October 2011 Moms

ot: my 3 year old uses curse words in his everyday vocab. wwyd?

we live in a very large apt complex, ppl are always outside. we are outside most of the day. my Ds has picked up on all our neibghors fowl mouths. It seems like every other word that comes out of thesse ppls mouths our curse words. i have always tried to move ds out of ear shot when they start cursing but it dont always work. over the past month he has really started using bad words. not just saying $hit when he drops something but sentences like: f**k it,im not eating stupied $hit! he evens uses GD! i bet he uses words like that 1,000 times a day. i have tried to teach him those are bad words and just cause he hears them dont mean to repeat. he just gets worse every day. its embrassing to go somewhere cause his language makes me look bad. how can i stop his cursing and would it be wrong to tell ppl outside no to cure?

Re: ot: my 3 year old uses curse words in his everyday vocab. wwyd?

  • How much attention is he getting when he uses these words?  Negative attention is still attention, be careful not to feed the beast!!!

    I would not make it a big deal at this point I would just tell him that he is a nice boy and nice boys use nice words and tell him the proper or nice word  to use instead.   

    I think I would stay inside too!

    Edit to add

    If it doesn't improve with gentle correction then try timeouts.  (1 minutes x age) 3 minute time out.  Remember that he needs to be told why he is having a timeout.

    Positive reinforcement works! and maybe easy to implement then having 1000 timeouts in a day.

     

    siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894 photo siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894-1_zpscf1469c3.jpg
  • UFCaseyUFCasey member

    imageWoodsie:
    What does ot mean?

    I'm guessing off-topic maybe?  I have to admit I chuckled a little a 'fowl mouth'. Sorry OP, I have no advice, other than threats of soap in the mouth perhaps? 

  • Loading the player...
  • UFCaseyUFCasey member
    ETA: Missed the part where he was only 3 - nix the soap mouth threats.
  • What Penny said, and do you have to hang out with these foul mouthed people?  I would find a new area to hang out at.
  • imageUFCasey:

    imageWoodsie:
    What does ot mean?

    I'm guessing off-topic maybe?  I have to admit I chuckled a little a 'fowl mouth'. Sorry OP, I have no advice, other than threats of soap in the mouth perhaps? 

    image 

    siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894 photo siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894-1_zpscf1469c3.jpg
  • trust me these ppl are not friends. its hard to keep a 3 yr old inside all day and we only have one car and my bf drives it to work, so we cant go to parks or other places to play. i thought this would be a ok place for kids. they have space to play, we all share a big front and back yard and theire are lots of kids. Like i said there is always ppl out and its not just adults that are using these words, its the kids too. we are planing to move in the near future cause i dont wont my kids talking like this. As far as friends go, we have lived here a year and i barely know anyones name.
  • we cant afford to move at this time, we have looked into but just cant however we are saving all we can so we can move soon. we did not realize it was so bad when we first moved but now i realize their are lots of problems here. just last week we were outside and this boy who was maybe 5 yrs old was playing with my son. then i heard the boy say look "im shooting up" he had a stick poking his arm. needless to say we quickily went inside.
  • imagestarlite24:
    trust me these ppl are not friends. its hard to keep a 3 yr old inside all day and we only have one car and my bf drives it to work, so we cant go to parks or other places to play. i thought this would be a ok place for kids. they have space to play, we all share a big front and back yard and theire are lots of kids. Like i said there is always ppl out and its not just adults that are using these words, its the kids too. we are planing to move in the near future cause i dont wont my kids talking like this. As far as friends go, we have lived here a year and i barely know anyones name.

    I would  POLITELY correct adults and children speaking this way in front of my children. 

     
    siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894 photo siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894-1_zpscf1469c3.jpg
  • imagepennysuedog:

    imagestarlite24:
    trust me these ppl are not friends. its hard to keep a 3 yr old inside all day and we only have one car and my bf drives it to work, so we cant go to parks or other places to play. i thought this would be a ok place for kids. they have space to play, we all share a big front and back yard and theire are lots of kids. Like i said there is always ppl out and its not just adults that are using these words, its the kids too. we are planing to move in the near future cause i dont wont my kids talking like this. As far as friends go, we have lived here a year and i barely know anyones name.

    I would  POLITELY correct adults and children speaking this way in front of my children. 

     
    this is what i feel i need to do but i dont know if i have the right. i wouldnt want someone telling me how to talk, but then i dont use bad language like they do
  • imagepennysuedog:

    imagestarlite24:
    trust me these ppl are not friends. its hard to keep a 3 yr old inside all day and we only have one car and my bf drives it to work, so we cant go to parks or other places to play. i thought this would be a ok place for kids. they have space to play, we all share a big front and back yard and theire are lots of kids. Like i said there is always ppl out and its not just adults that are using these words, its the kids too. we are planing to move in the near future cause i dont wont my kids talking like this. As far as friends go, we have lived here a year and i barely know anyones name.

    I would  POLITELY correct adults and children speaking this way in front of my children. 

     
    this is what i feel i need to do but i dont know if i have the right. i wouldnt want someone telling me how to talk, but then i dont use bad language like they do
  • i have even went to the landlord about this. She put flyers in everyones door saying that part of the lease agrement is to respect your neigbhoors and that using bad language outside where you can be heard is disrepectful. It didnt change anything.
  • If kids are saying something naughty this is what I would say...

    "Hey, my son really likes playing with you, but you need to watch your mouth, because we don't want him saying naughty words anymore."

    If they don't stop go inside.  The kids will either learn that they can't talk like that around you or they will just stop hanging out by you.

    If adults are talking crude...

    "Hi, what's your name?"  "Hey ____, can you do me a favor? My son has picked up a pretty bad potty mouth lately.  I would really help me out if you can watch what you say when he is in ear shot.  Thank you!"

    I think most decent people would not be offended by this, they simply are not aware of their habits.

     


     

     

    siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894 photo siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894-1_zpscf1469c3.jpg
  • imagestarlite24:
    i have even went to the landlord about this. She put flyers in everyones door saying that part of the lease agrement is to respect your neigbhoors and that using bad language outside where you can be heard is disrepectful. It didnt change anything.

    If you are friendly with people and get their respect they will respect you, and they will listen to your requests.

    siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894 photo siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894-1_zpscf1469c3.jpg
  • I cuss in front of my kids and unless it's like a kids birthday party I'm not going to correct another adults language. I have just explained to E certain words are for adults just like certain activities and that I don't want him saying them in public because they aren't nice but if he feels he must say them to do so at home. By not forbidding it it becomes uninteresting and he will correct the older kids in the neighborhood who think they sound cool. 
  • imagecantalopes24:
    I cuss in front of my kids and unless it's like a kids birthday party I'm not going to correct another adults language. I have just explained to E certain words are for adults just like certain activities and that I don't want him saying them in public because they aren't nice but if he feels he must say them to do so at home. By not forbidding it it becomes uninteresting and he will correct the older kids in the neighborhood who think they sound cool. 


    This will be us as well. I curse like a sailor and I am probably not gonna change that. Time and place, though. If he does it at home, sometimes - ok. If he curses out grandma, not ok. Get my drift?
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • imagepennysuedog:

    If kids are saying something naughty this is what I would say...

    "Hey, my son really likes playing with you, but you need to watch your mouth, because we don't want him saying naughty words anymore."

    If they don't stop go inside.  The kids will either learn that they can't talk like that around you or they will just stop hanging out by you.

    If adults are talking crude...

    "Hi, what's your name?"  "Hey ____, can you do me a favor? My son has picked up a pretty bad potty mouth lately.  I would really help me out if you can watch what you say when he is in ear shot.  Thank you!"

    I think most decent people would not be offended by this, they simply are not aware of their habits.

     


     

     

    In an ideal world this would be perfect! However, I have lived in apt complexes like the one described and (please, don't take offense, pennysuedog, no offense is meant) if I had said anything about those cursing, I would have been laughed at and it would have gotten much worse. People that curse like that AND teach their kids about 'shooting up' don't care what you think and won't be afraid to tell you. In some places you could very well get shot for 'telling someone how to talk' (I find this truth very sad) Good luck, IMO you will have to move. I hope you prove me wrong!!Wink

    imageimageBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • imagejeanniez:
    imagepennysuedog:

    If kids are saying something naughty this is what I would say...

    "Hey, my son really likes playing with you, but you need to watch your mouth, because we don't want him saying naughty words anymore."

    If they don't stop go inside.  The kids will either learn that they can't talk like that around you or they will just stop hanging out by you.

    If adults are talking crude...

    "Hi, what's your name?"  "Hey ____, can you do me a favor? My son has picked up a pretty bad potty mouth lately.  I would really help me out if you can watch what you say when he is in ear shot.  Thank you!"

    I think most decent people would not be offended by this, they simply are not aware of their habits.

     


     

     

    In an ideal world this would be perfect! However, I have lived in apt complexes like the one described and (please, don't take offense, pennysuedog, no offense is meant) if I had said anything about those cursing, I would have been laughed at and it would have gotten much worse. People that curse like that AND teach their kids about 'shooting up' don't care what you think and won't be afraid to tell you. In some places you could very well get shot for 'telling someone how to talk' (I find this truth very sad) Good luck, IMO you will have to move. I hope you prove me wrong!!Wink

    Wow!  Maybe you can tell I was born and raised in the suburbsWink

    siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894 photo siggy1-16-13_zpsbc591894-1_zpscf1469c3.jpg
  • imagejeanniez:
    imagepennysuedog:

    If kids are saying something naughty this is what I would say...

    "Hey, my son really likes playing with you, but you need to watch your mouth, because we don't want him saying naughty words anymore."

    If they don't stop go inside.  The kids will either learn that they can't talk like that around you or they will just stop hanging out by you.

    If adults are talking crude...

    "Hi, what's your name?"  "Hey ____, can you do me a favor? My son has picked up a pretty bad potty mouth lately.  I would really help me out if you can watch what you say when he is in ear shot.  Thank you!"

    I think most decent people would not be offended by this, they simply are not aware of their habits.

     


     

     

    In an ideal world this would be perfect! However, I have lived in apt complexes like the one described and (please, don't take offense, pennysuedog, no offense is meant) if I had said anything about those cursing, I would have been laughed at and it would have gotten much worse. People that curse like that AND teach their kids about 'shooting up' don't care what you think and won't be afraid to tell you. In some places you could very well get shot for 'telling someone how to talk' (I find this truth very sad) Good luck, IMO you will have to move. I hope you prove me wrong!!Wink

    yes you are right i would be laughed at and would prob make it worse.
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"