Siggy warningAdvice for friends wanting to support Mom with loss today

Natalie&Mark · May 2012

Our birth month board turned into a very close-knit group, and eventually migrated to a private Facebook group. One of the cheeriest, most helpful, supportive, wonderful ladies delivered today, only to have her son not make it. We're all devastated, and between the ~280 of us, have taken up a nice sized donation. We don't know details, but thought you ladies might have the best ideas.

Proposed so far:
Peace Lily plant, Star Registry, Prepaid Visa (toward memorial or funeral expenses or WHATEVER they want/need), Restaurant gift cards

Thoughts?

Carolee · May 2012

I added a warning to your title - your u/s picture might be hard for some women here to see...just a heads up. I'm so sorry to hear about your friend's devastating loss. At the top of the board, there is a link to a sticky post titled "How to Help" that might give you some good ideas. I think the ideas you have are good. You might want to consider using some of the money to pay for some meal deliveries or something like that. I'm glad your group is trying to be there for your friend.

pb127 · May 2012

Carolee:
I added a warning to your title - your u/s picture might be hard for some women here to see...just a heads up. I'm so sorry to hear about your friend's devastating loss. At the top of the board, there is a link to a sticky post titled "How to Help" that might give you some good ideas. I think the ideas you have are good. You might want to consider using some of the money to pay for some meal deliveries or something like that. I'm glad your group is trying to be there for your friend.

Ditto all of this!! Please be careful- some of us are May 2012 moms with losses, so your pics and tickers are really painful.

Thanks for the warning Carolee. Right Hug

MrsRiceARoni · May 2012

I think offering it to help with her funeral expenses is nice. I know when Noah passed away, we were not prepared to pay for funeral expenses on top of all of my medical bills from the delivery. We were fortunate enough that my ILs offered to pay for the burial/funeral expenses but we still have not gotten him a head stone.

Petunia844 · May 2012

Carolee:
I added a warning to your title - your u/s picture might be hard for some women here to see...just a heads up. I'm so sorry to hear about your friend's devastating loss. At the top of the board, there is a link to a sticky post titled "How to Help" that might give you some good ideas. I think the ideas you have are good. You might want to consider using some of the money to pay for some meal deliveries or something like that. I'm glad your group is trying to be there for your friend.

All of this. Sometimes I don't understand why people come here to ask us help without worrying about hurting the amazing women on this board who are all mourning too. I know you mean well and I'm so sorry for your friend...but I get frustrated by this.

Natalie&Mark · May 2012

Thank you for adding the warning. I'm SO sorry that didn't occur to me yesterday. I was heartbroken, and my head was clearly malfunctioning. I appreciate the feedback so very much, ladies, thank you.

samakasrc · May 2012

I'm very close to the women in my birth month board via their facebook group. They sent me flowers and a personalized necklace with my babies names on it. I was flaborgasted when I recieved it.

xxswebbxx · May 2012

MrsRiceARoni:
I think offering it to help with her funeral expenses is nice. I know when Noah passed away, we were not prepared to pay for funeral expenses on top of all of my medical bills from the delivery. We were fortunate enough that my ILs offered to pay for the burial/funeral expenses but we still have not gotten him a head stone.

THIS. When I was told my Olivia wasn't going to make it the only thing that kept doing threw my head was how the hell are we going to afford a funeral. We prepared to bring a baby home not burry one.

It's also very nice all you ladies did this for your friend. Obviously this is a very hard time that gets harder for us because alot of our "close" friends become very distant.