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Working Moms
Freaking out about infant care costs/what did you do?
All the places I'm researching cost around $2700 a month for infant care. Many of them don't allow mom to visit during the day, you can only come during drop off and pick up times. I don't like that. Plus, I can't afford $2700 a month. Yikes.
I would love if my mom could help, but she's fighting cancer, so I don't think she can deal with a new baby - or at least not until the baby is six months and can sit up a little bit. My grandmother is 87, so that's a no go. MIL doesn't live here. And, my own sisters have jobs.
Hubby doesn't work on Wednesdays so that's one day taken care of, at least. But I confess I never really thought about infant care until, uh, just now. I took it for granted that my grandmother kept me and my sisters until I was five.
My boss has a nanny and an au pair. She also makes, like, 22x what I make.
How do people do this?!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Freaking out about infant care costs/what did you do?
They stay-at-home if they truly can't afford daycare. Or get creative:
-Find a SAHM who wouldn't mind watching your baby for cash.
-Work opposite shifts than your DH, eliminating childcare needs.
-Work at a place that provides daycare (like the daycare itself)
-Look into a nanny share.
-Beg family members
All have their PROs and CONs.
Look for inhome daycares, here they are probably 60-70% the cost of centers.
We are actually have a SAHM watch our daughter and doing that we are saving about 35% of center costs and don't have to pay for days we don't use like when we are on vacation, holidays or sick days.
So I live in a HCOL suburb outside of Boston and infant care is $700 a week (2800 a month). I'm not really much help, since my mom watches DS, but when I researched it in my area, a nanny share was cheaper and in home care the cheapest. You could look on care.com for a nanny share. ( a friend at church uses it).
I agree with what pp said about trying to alternate hours with DH (if that works with your line of work).
In home daycares tend to charge the rate for infants as they would for a five year old. $2700 a month is too high, I pay slightly more than that for 2 kids in Milwaukee. Good luck!
See if your county has an office of families and children- ours provides referrals for both daycare centers and licensed in-home facilities. This is where we found our provider (an in-home center)- it is MUCH less expensive than the daycare facilities, and the hours are more flexible. I am also in a HCOL area.
In our county, daycare providers are not allowed to forbid parents from dropping in. I would seriously side-eye any place that didn't want me to be able to see what goes on during the day.
I work in downtown Chicago and live right outside of downtown. The places around here range from around $2100 to $2700 a month. The 2700 a month place looked fab online, but it's a no-go for me. I did find a Kindercare after one PP said to look for that. (I've always seen them, but didn't know they offered infant care.) That one is about $1400 a month for an infant, according to someone who had a kid there five years ago. I'm sure the prices have risen since that time. And nope, I'm not having twins.
The Chicago board is pretty dang on quiet, so not many people are a help there. But Craigslist and Children and Fam are a good idea, so I'll poke around there. I did find out today that the YMCA offers infant care, so though I'd prefer to find something in downtown Chicago, I'll swing by there too.
Now I more fully understand why all my mom friends made the move to the 'burbs... I'm also researching the child care tax credit. That should help some, even though it looks like it varies according to income. I'm also going to sign up for the child care flexible spending account through my employer. Do your daycare centers give you a receipt to turn in to your spending account manager? How does that work?
I don't live in Chicago but the suburbs. You can use this referral site to gather information on various forms of child care (ie centers, in home) You just have to provide them with some information and they will email you a list. You would be surprise how many locations are in your area that you were not aware of.
https://www.inccrra.org/
DTNZ4Ever et all,
Thanks for this website. On it immediately. Hadn't heard of it before.
First, take a deep breath.
Second, where do you live? 2700 for one child in daycare?! I live in NJ, where childcare is NOT cheap, and I paid less than that for TWO kids (including an infant), for fantastic care with low child to cargiver care.
While we don't pay 2700, our costs are high and require a huge "gulp" every month. But, less quality care wasn't something we were willing to do, so we sacrifice. We don't take big vacations or buy new cars. We don't go out on dates (we have them in, sometimes ordering in but usually just watch tv with a glass of wine), whereas before kids we spent our "spare" money going out alot. I'll be honest, things are tight. But we looked at all the expenses (including childcare) and accepted as best we could that it still "makes sense" financially for me to keep working and pay the childcare costs. My daughter starts kindergarten next year so we'll be very happy to not have that to pay for anymore (still will have our son's, though....).
I'd start looking for less expensive quality care. I never heard of anyone paying that much money for even two kids at daycare centers. Good luck!
Also, I'd add that centers NOT permitting a parent to come whenever they like is NOT the norm. I don't trust that. It's your child, you should have access whenever you want. Where we are, many of the moms stop by at lunchtime to play/nurse their babies. It's welcomed.
My suggestion is to go and look at every single place in your area (I know it's a lot of work--if there are 100s, then obviously narrow down). Make a checklist of things important to you and call ahead to ask about it. Then go in (w/o apptmt, if you can) to get a "feel" for the place. If centers are really that expensive near you, consider a Nanny, who you might find for less than that.
We had to make a lot of sacrifices!
I honestly don't know what we'll do when it's time for #2. If I do get KU with #3, I may have to stay home.
Look at in home daycares, and look around for nannies. Not all of them cost a ton of money. You can also see about smaller centers.
$2700 is a lot- yikes. You must be in a HCOL area! Even in Cambridge, MA it doesn't cost quite that much.
We have an au pair, and it's surprisingly cheaper than A LOT of DC options! If you live in a HCOL it's a good option. The agency cost's around $7,000 for the year (that is an up front cost) and you pay the au pair $200 a week for 45 hours (flexible schedule). The rules are no more than 10 hours per day, and 45 hours per week, they need 1 day off a week and one weekend off per month (your choice as to when that is).
You need to provide a room for them and food. My au pairs tend to go out a lot to eat with their friends. I cant' say that I spent more than $40 extra any given month on food, and I'm not sure if that was them, or my kids just growing! The only extra cost is $500 for the year towards their educational classes, and if you want them to drive you have to add them to your insurance (so that is an optional cost).
Since your DH is home on Wednesdays, if you choose to have the au pair "off" that day you can have her work on Saturday nights instead, and get a free "date night" with your DH!
All in all it's not bad for around $17,000 per year (around $1,400 per month). I'm not sure how close you work to home, but of course you are more than welcome to stop by anytime! It's not an option for everyone, but it's a great one for us!
Our LO attends an accredited in-home daycare. It's quite a bit cheaper. I can call and drop in whenever I'd like to. There are not as many kids so he gets more individualized care. Our other option was to work different shifts so we wouldn't need daycare.
Holy cow...you need to search elsewhere. I like to think my LO is at a great school...not Muffy and Buffy great...but a great Montessori school in a really good neighborhood and we pay $1300/month. Albeit I don't know where you live or anything.
Budget budget budget...you may not get to go out as often...but were you really thinking you were going to with a newborn?
Most places should let you drop-in...honestly, is this even and honest and valid post?
1) I can't imagine that $2700 places are your only option, even in Chicago. You work in downtown but live outside? I'd use the options in your neighborhood, not your work area.
2) Formal centers (the easiest to find via google searches) will be the most expensive; then nanny shares; then in-homes. In-home providers vary a lot in quality & price. Virginia keeps a public record of inspections & violations of every state-licensed in-home care provider so I used that in my search.
3) Yes, make use of the childcare flex account, which allows you to put in up to $5k. Some employers also offer some discounts/reimbursements. If you & your husband can stagger your schedules so that one of you works early (6:30 - 3) & the other works late (9:30 - 6), then you can minimize the number of hours your little one spends in care, so that can also reduce your costs.
4) If you higher a nanny, you become an employer and need to pay various taxes & file paperwork, etc. If a SAHM wants to start her own in-home daycare but keep it small and only have 1-2 extra kids in her home, then it's a lot like having a nanny except a) you lose the convenience of it being in your own home and b) she's not technically your employee. Sometimes that's the cheapest and easiest way to go.
Good luck, you can definitely find something cheaper.
When I signed up for DCFSA it was 5k/yr max, that includes any employer contribution. Not sure if it is different for other family dynamics than mine.
Silly question, if you can't visit your LO whenever you want how can you BF on your lunch break if you wanted too like many parents do?
re preggersin2011... I had all these visions of breastfeeding over my lunch break, which is why I want baby downtown with me. But that's not gonna happen with those costs. It's too early to talk to my boss about it, but I'm also going to see if they might let me work from home for one or two days a week - at least for a month or two. If I can get baby to six months old, the prices start to drop at these care centers.
I did sign up for the care website. Never heard of that before either. There seem to be a number of inhome options in my neighborhood. Most of them are religion based, interestingly. Few have web sites or are listed on the BBB site. To the Chicago mom who suggested the NPN network. Thanks! I'm signing up for that too. Had no clue these networks existed.
If I do in home daycare, I won't be able to drop in and check on baby. I confess I watched the hand that rocks the cradle and I had a dream about someone else breastfeeding my baby! I won't do that again.
Regardless of the cost difference, I would not put LO in daycare far from home, even if it is close to work. What if you switch jobs? What if your DH needs to pick up or drop off? What if you have the day off, but want to take LO in for a few hours so you can get stuff done around the house? What if LO HATES riding in the carseat and screams all the way into down and all the way home? Just some things to think about.
DS born Dec 10, 2013
I definitely can commiserate - the centers in downtown chicago are about $600 per week for infants; it definitely eclipsed my salary when we had DS. To compare, the in-home where he has been for the past three years is $275 per week; they ask that we not visit because they have a flow to their day, and when other kids see you there they start looking for their mommy and/or daddy. Any time I needed to pick up DS or adjust his schedule I did what I needed to do; but there are a few things I would recommend.
Liscensing is a must; with thurough background checks. My in-home is a converted house so they live on the top two floors and have a finished basement for the actual DC space with a seperate refridgerator and bathroom.
The thing I liked best about the inhome is that DS is with the same people every day, as there are no shift workers, or turnover to contend with. Noone is making minimum wage(and thus not that invested), and noone cutting corners on cleaning because this is their home.
I worked in a center as a teen in the summers, and I can say I genuinely loved my kids, but I can also say that a larger institution will have to do things differently simply because of its size.
I live in Chicago suburbs in a HCOL/wealthier 'burb. $2,700 is insanely high. The nicest, most prestigious daycare center here charges $350/week or $1,400 a month - and that is where your kid can eat all organic and has a 'curriculum' each week.
If I were you, I would look into a nanny share or au pair. Another great idea is to find a SAHM who wants to make some cash and will watch your child. Try care.come or sittercity. You could even hire a nanny through an agency and pay less than $2,700/month!!
There are not excellent daycare center options in the city. The nice ones like Creme de la Creme or Kensington are in the 'burbs. But you certainly have many options. Take your time, do your research...you will find something that works for you.
Pregnant with Baby #3
CP#1: March 2011
BFP: June 2011; DD born Feb 2012!
CP#2: February 2013
BFP: March 2013; DS born Nov 2013!
Baby #3 due: August 15, 2017