Ugh, why do I lurk on my old BMB? (Pregnancy mentioned)

BootsOrHearts · May 2012

I feel so close to those women and I want to keep track of how they're doing but it was hard today to see a whole bunch of 'felt the baby move', 'dad felt the baby kick' kind of posts. That's what I should be writing right now instead of this pity party post.

It is sweet to see so many of them with the badge they made me in their siggies, that chokes me up every time, that they cared enough to do that for me and my little guy.

I'm in such a weird place right now, I like being able to post some support for the women on the Loss boards and I hope it helps, but I also feel like I still need a lot myself. The only thing that helps me is to think about the future and how that will be me again some day soon.

Ok, pity party over!

funny bunny · May 2012

It's so sweet that they are wearing that badge.

I try not to do this to myself, although every once in a while I venture there..and run myself into an abyss of emotions. *Hugs* I know how you feel.

panacea05 · May 2012

It hurts. I try not to think where I "should" be right now, but that's next to impossible. I know I can't go near my BMBs. No good EVER comes of it.

I'm with you--thinking about the future is the only thing getting me through the present. It WILL be us again someday!

raashton · May 2012

I am so sorry, sweetie. It hurts and I totally understand that desire to keep tabs on a group that you felt you deserved to be a part of always.

That is so sweet that even though you feel you don't beling there anymore they continue showing you their support.

ChloBub · May 2012

(((HUGS))) That badge is really sweet. It's really hard to be on the BMB board, though. If you're anything like I've been, you'll find yourself checking it less and less. I'm sorry it's so hard. We all get it.

Actingdiva09 · May 2012

It's a strange balance, supporting others while still grieving. It's something I've come to embrace and kinda understand, because those who are also grieving are going through the same emotions and experiences, and understand your pain the best. It makes me very grateful for this board!!

I understand your desire to lurk and I'm SO glad they have a badge for you! I'm so sorry for the pain that those topics bring... I know how much it hurts. It's totally not a pity party, it's you letting out your pain, and that's why we're here for each other!!!{{{hugs}}}

psychmajormom · May 2012

I know what you mean honey! ((((huge hugs))))

luvsdogs2 · May 2012

That is so sweet that they did that for you. ((Hugs))

csspencer · May 2012

I still lurk at times and I always kick myself after I do...((Hugs))

Mrs.E.07 · May 2012

I'm so sorry. I was on the Oct board too. In fact, it looks like we got our BFPs on the same date :-( I have managed to avoid the board completely, despite feeling tempted pretty often. But I also wasn't on it for as long.

((((hugs)))) to you.

nkemp · May 2012

That's a tough one. It really shows your heart that you are trying to check in on the group. That's not something that I have been able to do. ((hugs))

BootsOrHearts · May 2012

Thanks ladies. You are awesome. Hopefully I'll be posting a big fat positive result over there soon!

xxswebbxx · May 2012

BootsOrHearts:
Thanks ladies. You are awesome. Hopefully I'll be posting a big fat positive result over there soon!

HUGS. I hope you do too.

lsuhoneybadger · May 2012

(((hugs))) to you boots

April! · May 2012

Why do we do this to ourselves? Ugh. I'm glad I'm not the only one. It's so hard, and hurts so much. I hope your BFP comes soon too! ((hugs))

s.alarie · May 2012

You must have been part of your BMB since you got your BFP, so I can only imagine it's nearly impossible to not wander over there to check on them.

I'm glad you're here, even though I'm sad you have to be. The beautiful thing about a loss board is the balance of old and new--you get to see the progression of working through your loss. Those who are fairly far out from their loss are not only a source of information, but can show us that there is light at the end of the tunnel. Experiencing a pregnancy loss is often a woman's darkest, most depressing time. There are so many who have made it through, and you will too.

Big (((hugs))) for you. That's what we're here for.

beachbum4304 · May 2012

(Hugs). I think it's great that they made you a badge and are supportive. And I think you are a better person than me for still wanting to be supportive!! I couldn't . . I used to go to my BMB and then I just had to quit.

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Ugh, why do I lurk on my old BMB? (Pregnancy mentioned)

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