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Venting! SD's BM is in town -- no Thanksgiving Dinner.

CampanitaCampanita
in Blended Families

I don't know if I should be mad at my DH or at my SD's BM.  Maybe both!!  BM lives in Oregon, hardly calls her daughter, not involved at all, unless she wants to speak to my DH -- to play f*cking video games online!!  But, a couple days ago when I was doing my grocery list my DH says, let's skip the turkey and all that jazz -- BM is going to be in town and she will take SD with her.  I feel so angry!!  So all I do goes unrewarded and cannot have a family holiday!  But whenever this selfish beast wants, she can take all the fun days.  I'll be the one to deal with a kid who didn't shower for 4 or 5 days on Monday because BM is the fun, cool mom and I'm the mean SM who enforces all the rules.

 I decided to make the dinner just for me . . . because I'm sure DH will go over to his ex in-laws!!   AAAAAAhhhhhhhh!!

Sorry.  But, thanks for letting me vent!!

 

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Re: Venting! SD's BM is in town -- no Thanksgiving Dinner.

  • mhwoodmhwood member

    Wow.  It definitely sounds as though you and your DH should sit down and talk about his relationship with his ex.

    Keep in mind the big picture...you are doing what you are doing because your SD needs a stable and loving female figure in her life. 

    Good luck! 

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  • J+RJ+R

    Im confused... your DH's ex wife sits and plays video games with him online? So it sounds like they are friendly?

    Also - he is still close with the ex in-laws? In a way I do understand that... My parents are divorced yet still go over to each others parents on holidays.  Are you at least included in on that???

     Im sorry that your feeling hurt and angry :( I would be angry also. It sounds as though you guys are friendly (at least your DH is) with the ex - would you be able to invite her over for dinner? And then allow your SD to stay with you guys?
     

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  • PlannedChaosPlannedChaos
    I know it's hard, but in the grand scheme, it's you she'll remember being there for her.  Why not do t-day for just you and your DH though? 
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  • sprky79sprky79 member

    I just want to make sure I perfectly understand what I just read:

    ?

    Your husband will ditch you on Thanksgiving to hang out with his ex inlaws.

    You married him why??

    Seriously, people. If your faith in humanity is destroyed because your parents told you there was a Santa Claus and as it turns out there is no Santa Claus, you are an ignorant, hypersensitive cry baby with absolutely zero perspective. - UnderwaterRhymes
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  • Mrs.SesaMrs.Sesa
    imagesprky79:

    I just want to make sure I perfectly understand what I just read:

     

    Your husband will ditch you on Thanksgiving to hang out with his ex inlaws.

    You married him why? 

    I was wondering the same thing???

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  • Littlejen22Littlejen22 member
    Yeah, I am confused too.  Why is your DH playing video games with his uninvolved ex?  And why is he ditching you to go to his ex-inlaws without you even if his kid is there.  Either you go too or he does not go.  If my DH suggested that I sit at home alone on Thanksgiving while he has dinner with the ex he would be looking for a new place to live - and I am serious.  And there is no way in he!! he would be playing video games with the woman that could not bother calling and asking how SD was doing.  You need to seriously get therapy or a divorce.
    Jen - Mom to two December 12 babies Nathaniel 12/12/06 and Addison 12/12/08
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  • Mrs.Astros_FanMrs.Astros_Fan
    You definitely have a DH problem....for lots of reasons.  I would be raising holy h*ll if my husband was playing video games online with his ex, while she was being the absent parent.  And I hope you're joking about him going over to his ex in-laws!
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