Finished HSG on Friday

On Friday we went down to the local hospital for my HSG.  I am deeply amused by radiology departments; everything is funny: the radiologists, the rooms are cold and smell weird and are dark.  Plus, radiologist just have strage senses of humor.

 I was a little nervous, but only because I was going to get my body mildly invaded by a complete stranger.  I try to be gentle to myself in times like this.

 "Yes," I say to myself, "this is a bizarre situation.  It is RIGHT to feel a little weird."

We get a great nurse whom we later decide is smart, funny and has just a dry enough wit to get through the day.  Dr. X-ray is humorless at first.  I continue being my cheerful, irreverant self while my sweetheart stands in a lead apron and rolls her eyes at my jokes and general enthusiasm.  She is as silent as I am jovial.  I really do love seeing inside my own body using the miracle of modern technology, so when they pulled the monitor over, I was pretty stoked and let everyone know about this in no uncertain terms.

Yes, Dr. X was no OB-Gyn. He's not a vagina man so it wasn't really the best pelvic I've had. He wielded a square of gauze on a clamp to swab my cervic with betadine, which really felt like a pretty significant sized setup, I'll tell you. 

Overall pain reached a high of 2 on the old pain scale, but diminished to .5 once he quit the active party parts.  As he took the old-school speculum out and started injecting the dye I could really enjoy myself and ask all kinds of questions.

 "Is my uterus really as big as a cherry tomato?"

"What would "good" look like?"

"How much dye do you put in?"

And so on...

He finally broke down and chuckled several times and told me he was glad that I was taking it so well, that lots of women really seemed uncomfortable during the procedure.  I said, "Well, it isn't my first option for good times on a Friday, but I expect you'll forgive that."  He chortled and said he felt sympathetic because hiswife had done it.  I didn't get to ask if they were lucky enough to make a baby; I hope so. I think he really felt bad doing the procedure most times and was a little overwhelmed to find a patient staying up-beat and conversational; I think he really didn't know what to do when I didn't just lie there, white knuckled and speechless. I was glad when he could enjoy reading the results and tell me little insights and tidbits.

Long story shorter, I watched the dye fill  my triangular uterus and then sneak up the little wire-thin fallopian tubes and gush, all loose and unfettered, into my peritenial cavity, just like it is all supposed to do.  He said that it did exactly what it should and he didn't see any issues.

 I was pretty stoked.  And glad when he removed the pokey sticks from the ole' cervix.

One more box checked and on to the next...

 CageyMack