WWYD about this H playing league sports situation?
I'm kind of bargin' in here. I'm currently pregnant with #2 (and we will be 2U2).
Here's the lowdown:
H is in a Thursday night bowling lead 35 weeks out of the year.
H is in a slow pitch softball league for about 10 weeks.
He really likes being in these leagues, but it's almost an entire year of H being gone one night a week. He is gone right now to a bowling tournament. I am at home dealing with nausea and trying to finish up a huge assignent for a graduate class I'm taking. This wouldn't be an issue but my son has awakened 3 times already sobbing (which is WAY out of character for him), so I've had to go up and comfort him so pretty much I've gotten a half page of a 7-10 page paper written.
I'm just a little overwhelmed right now.
These league sports are his hobby. I hate to ask him to give them up, yet I haven't gotten to enjoy more than a couple of nights doing my hobby (my horse still gets brushed...but I haven't ridden since my son was born) since my 2nd trimester of my first pregnancy.
Would you be asking H to give up his hobbies totally? partly?
Any advice is greatly appreciated.
Re: WWYD about this H playing league sports situation?
I may not be the bset person to advise on this topic, as my H's hobbies can be enjoyed from home. (My biggest problem w/his hobbies is the cost, not the time he puts into them.) But as a pg mom of 2u2 (who's not even in school) I knoow it's hard to get things done without help.
On one hand, bowling is one night a week. On the other hand, it's a good portion of the year. So I think I'd ask him to find a league w/a shorter season, or maybe choose between bowling and softball.
Hobbies are important, yes, but when dealing w/2u2 I think those things need to be put aside for a bit. It sucks, and I totally miss my hobbies, but I still get time to myself and just choose more carefully what I want to put my time & money into.
Great advice! Thanks.
Could he cut back on the time spent on the hobbies?
My DH is an obsessive hunter & fishes when he can. I know he loves hunting so I try to remain calm during the Oct-Dec season but by the end of it I've had enough. He has cut back since having DD, but it's hard. After Thanksgiving he goes to camp from Friday to the following Saturday or Sunday! I plan things by myself so he can take a turn at parenting DD by himself. It's only fair, and helps my sanity.
ETA: Things may change again this year, we're due with #2 in Sept.
I agree with this and with the previous poster who said you should also take one night a week to yourself. My husband cut back to playing basketball just one night a week after our son was born (he used to also play on Saturday mornings). One night a week is very reasonable.
Yes, this. 1 night a week is reasonable. It seems like this particular night is just a bad confluence of events. You said you would have been fine if your little guy hadn't (uncharacteristically) woken up 3 times.
I agree with PPs... try to stay ahead of the game on your HW if possible, and make sure you get your 1 night a week too!
No, I wouldn't. But I would totally make a point of doing something 1 night a week as well. Riding your horse, going out with friends, the gym, whatever.
DH is in three sports, Sunday am Monday and wednesday pm and works real late on Thursday's. He doesn't come home before going to his games on the weeknights. I have 2u2 and it's hard but he will never give up his sports so I plan to go out Friday nights when I can and on Thursdays I sometimes have a mothers helper (teenager) come over that we pay. If he ever said anything about the $20 I sped for the help than he can just stay home and be the free help, he's never said anything.