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Can I disown my mom?

MrsRiceARoniMrsRiceARoni member
in Pregnant after a Loss
So my mom and I generally aren't the best of friends, but we get along much better now that I live a different state. But I just got a card in the mail from her, a mothers day card for the "mom to be" that's all good and fine, I know she's excited about me being pregnant again and everything. But inside it talks about this new baby and how exciting it's going to be when baby is here etc. Not a single word about Noah??? Ummm hello you were there when I delivered him just over a year ago! Does he not count??? I'm so mad at her I could scream!
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Re: Can I disown my mom?

  • Allycat11Allycat11 member
    ((hugs)) Other people can be so insensitive, I am sorry she did not mention him at all.  We all know you are a mom to a handsome angel baby. 
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  • TA110980TA110980 member

    imageAllycat11:
    ((hugs)) Other people can be so insensitive, I am sorry she did not mention him at all.  We all know you are a mom to a handsome angel baby. 

    This.  I couldn't have said it better.  **hugs** 

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    BFP#1 - 09/12/11, EDD 5/18/12 - Stopped growing at 6w3d, m/c induced 10/14/11
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  • cannoliohcannolioh member
    I'm sorry. I don't understand why people can't seem to recognize our angel babies or the fact that they are who first made us mothers. It hurts even more when it comes from our parents for some reason. 
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  • JulesDianeJulesDiane member

    Maybe she was worried about stirring up your feelings? I would let her know how you feel about her forgetting about Noah, and I bet the next time she will know that it is okay to talk about him.

     

    ((hugs))

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  • WearingRedWearingRed member
    While I agree with you ladies let me to be devils advocate. She might have been trying to not bring up something that would upset you. And I can understand where that feeling comes from no matter how wrong it is to ignore an angel!

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  • LoveOfMikesLifeLoveOfMikesLife member

    Yes for that you can disown her. I "get" the not trying to hurt you comments but NOTHING I repeat NOTHING hurts worse than having your child "forgotten" about. Even with a new pregnancy you will be thinking about Noah on mothers day and I personally believe that people use the "I didn't want to upset you" excuse to make themselves feel more comfortable with the situation. 

     

    ((hugs)) mrs rice..... It's hard and it's only going to get harder the farther along you get. 

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  • tetiananinatetiananina member

    imageWearingRed:
    While I agree with you ladies let me to be devils advocate. She might have been trying to not bring up something that would upset you. And I can understand where that feeling comes from no matter how wrong it is to ignore an angel!

    I agree but either way I'm sorry that it upset you when I'm sure that's not what her intentions were. ((hugs)) know Noah is smiling down on you wishing you a Happy Mothers Day! 

    BFP: 01/08/11 EDD: 09/15/11 Natural MC: 02/03/11
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  • MrsRiceARoniMrsRiceARoni member
    Thanks but I don't think it's a matter of not wanting to hurt my feelings, I think I've made it quite clear to my family that I'd prefer if they acknowledge him than just pretend like he never existed. My mom of all people should know better, she lost a son too, but hers was to SIDS at 2 months old. I grew up alway knowing about him, he was never a secret. So why does everyone refuse to talk about Noah?
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  • quezzoquezzo member
    imageLoveOfMikesLife:

    Yes for that you can disown her. I "get" the not trying to hurt you comments but NOTHING I repeat NOTHING hurts worse than having your child "forgotten" about. Even with a new pregnancy you will be thinking about Noah on mothers day and I personally believe that people use the "I didn't want to upset you" excuse to make themselves feel more comfortable with the situation. 

     

    ((hugs)) mrs rice..... It's hard and it's only going to get harder the farther along you get. 

    This exactly. Hugs too you! 

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  • weddedwifeweddedwife member
    Ouch. I feel for you mama. My mom was in the delivery room when Nathaniel was born, and she has only ever talked about him a few times. She never brings it up. Ever. It's like it never happened. We are supposed to go to dinner w/ my parents tomorrow, I dread that they will not acknowledge him at all.
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