I apologize now for the length of this post, but I am trying to work through things in my head and my brain isn't working right. I hope it makes sense....
I wanted a natural birth with my first. We went through Lamaze and had great plans but then she flipped breach at 36 weeks, my water broke at 37 weeks, and so I barely had time to wrap my head around a possible C-section before I was on the operating table. But she and I both came out healthy so that is all that matters.
This time around I am hoping for a VBAC and my OB supports me in that. I wanting to try for a natural birth (I think). Here is my issue. I was talking with a friend about her husband who has bad allergies and I said that it seems silly to be that miserable all the time when you can take something for it. (I have such severe allergies I can't ignore them and have no choice but to take stuff, and get shots). Now - I know that is different than trying for a natural birth, but it made me wonder how I can feel that way but want a natural birth at the same time...
I am not a big fan of medication and believe it is great when necessary but I try to keep what I have to take to a minimum. Neither my husband nor I take medication just to take it or if a nap/sleep will accomplish the same thing. Also we don't give our daughter meds at the drop of a hat (like MIL and others tell us to all the time). In fact, because she eats so much fresh fruit and veggies and loves to drink water, she doesn't even get juice. Just water and milk.
I want to try for a natural birth for various reasons - but mostly because I want to know that I can do it. But then I run into the problem with - how is that different than being miserable and not doing what you can. I kind of feel like a hypocrite.
I love the Native American culture and with my first I looked towards them and read up on them because I was using them as inspiration (course, never really got that chance but hey). But now I am torn because if they could have gone without the pain and all would they have? They did use herbs and other methods to try to ease childbirth. How is that different than meds today?
So basically I am split and most people look at me like I am crazy for even considering a natural birth. I am hoping some of you ladies can give me your insight/opinion on natural birth in hopes that I can sort this out before I have to make a decision about it.
TIA!
Re: Insight needed on Natural Birth Reasons
Here's my take--
When birthing naturally, it's not like you're just sitting around being miserable and in pain and doing nothing about it. There are a plethora of natural comfort measures that people have ready in their natural birth toolkit to use to manage the sensations of labor. They just don't happen to be drugs. You're not stoically going through some terrible experience just in principle. I think a lot of people in our culture have that misconception. The laboring mom and her support people are doing lots of things for comfort measures to manage things.
Practicing relaxation exercises, self-hypnosis, laboring in the shower, tub, TENS units, rice sock warmed in microwave, birth ball, making out, swaying, vocalizing, dancing, singing, changing positions, reframing labor terminology so as not to think of it as painful, cold washcloth on forehead, warm washcloth on perineum, visualization, mantras, counterpressure applied by a partner or doula, the very presence of a trained doula, laboring in the comfort and safety of your home, etc, etc. People will usually prepare for natural birth by getting ready to be able to use many of these options.
To me, a huge side effect of an epidural is that you drastically reduce your options for pain management, because you can't move freely to do many of these things. Sometimes you end up paralyzed from the waist down but still feel everything, which I think would be rough.
Think of planning for a natural birth as giving yourself many more options and keeping your options open. Sounds to me that you are a good candidate for it. You generally try to avoid medications and interventions unless they're needed. You can probably manage your labor just fine with all these things in your toolkit, and may not be miserable at all, and won't even need to think of drugs.
For me, labor and birthing naturally was not miserable at all. The contractions come and go, too, so it's not a constant thing.
Good luck, mama! Keep seeking out like-minded sources.
i have three different thoughts
1) i spend 9 mths making careful choices about what goes into my body while growing a baby, why would i stop at birth unnecessarily. some drugs can cause problems for baby.
2) taking pain meds can lead to a cascade of interventions, which again are not optimal to mother and baby.
3) i liken childbirth to climbing a mountain. hardwork and painful, but i wouldn't pop some drugs to make it 'easier' because how could i work with my body?
Elizabeth 5yrs old Jane 3yrs old
Also, keep in mind that you're drawing a comparison between pregnancy/childbirth and an illness (in other words, something that needs a medical fix in order to make one healthy). Instead, you should be drawing a comparison between a birthing EMERGENCY and an illness (something that needs a medical fix in order to make one health). These are more accurate analogies:
A healthy pregnancy/birth is to a day when one has no allergy symptoms (in both cases, there there is no need for intervention).
A complicated pregnancy/birth is to a day when one has bad allergies (in both cases, there is a need for intervention).
Do you see how that rationale makes more sense? Pregnancy and birth are not diseases or illnesses. They are healthy
. A pregnancy where something goes wrong needs intervention. These are two VERY different situations, so don't beat yourself up by putting both of those circumstances into the same bracket.
Thanks Ladies!! Those makes lots of sense. And I agree - I was linking two things that shouldn't be directly linked. And it isn't like I would be going in unprepared - I would have things to help - just not meds. That really makes lots of sense and makes me feel better!
I obviously had to get a spinal tap for my C-section with my first and ended up in lots of pain. You know how you leg starts to hurt when falling asleep but if you move it - then it is ok. Well, I got this sensation but couldn't move my leg and the pain got really really intense and was just awful. Why risk that again if I can use other methods and do what my body does naturally.
Thanks!!!!
I agree with this also.
However, I don't think wanting an awesome, natural birthing experience where you feel connected to the process is an invalid reason in and of itself either. It's just as valid reason as moms who choose to not feel the labor as intensely and get a epidural right away - personal choice for how they want to experience that life situation.
After going through two very different, but amazing, natural births I would say that although I liked the idea that a baby without drugs in their system might have a little leg-up on learning to breast-feeding and bonding, that wasn't my real motivation. It was b/c I have attended and seen natural births and they were amazing, life-changing events for the moms not to mention the observers. The natural birth experience is more for the mom than on how the kid turns out IMO. I wanted to experience that and had such a crazy happy, blissful high after the birth of my first that I wanted it again with my second kid. IMO giving birth naturally was more akin with acomplishing a goal like finishing a marathon or racing a bike race and the end prize of a precious little baby was way better than a finishing medal.
...baby #3 is here...
Ooooo this too.
I don't often say it because people look at me like I'm insane, but having had two natural,although two quite different birth experiences, I LOVE giving birth.
Elizabeth 5yrs old Jane 3yrs old
This is a great post, and you've gotten some great responses. The only thing I'd add to the list is the word empowerment, which has already been alluded to. For me, it's definitely about birthing on my own terms and feeling like I climbed that mountain. I've heard women say, after delivering a baby naturally, that they feel they can do ANYTHING. (And I want to create a happy, powerful memory with my birth that I'll think of with joy rather than regret.) Watching "The Business of Being Born" shows some pretty incredible natural births-- and it definitely shows that nature can take its course without a lot of interventions just fine.
Good luck! :-)
...............the papeete blog...............
I have suffered migraines for most of my life. So as anyone who knows me will tell you, I am JUST FINE with painkillers. I am usually the first person to be all "Fill me with the sweet bliss of unconsciousness and fuzzy painfree clouds! Pills, needles, gas mask, whatever, get to it!"
But I went without epi or other painkillers for my childbirth.
My reasons were numerous. One, that I wanted to be in control of my body and fully cognizant during this really freaking important moment of my life. Two, the fact that regardless of how many friends and relatives who said "It's too painful!" I somehow believed that if women did this for centuries without an epi, I maybe could too. Three, intervention CAN lead to intervention, and due to my allergy to Lidocaine and clotting factors in my blood/blood thinners during pregnancy, I did NOT want a C-section and neither did my OB, my family doctor, or my perinatologist. Four, I am scared witless of having anything touch my spine, let alone a needle. Eek! Five, I can't stand not being mobile or staying in one position for long.
So yeah, natural for me. Even with the induction.
If it makes you feel any better, it sucks while you're going through it, but seriously, as soon as you have the baby? Your body starts wiping out the memories of the pain VERY EFFECTIVELY.