2nd Trimester

giving your bambino someone else's breastmilk?!

Not gonna lie, I'm kind of weirded out.

A friend of mine on facebook just posted that she has "frozen breastmilk that is reaching it's expiration date. If anyone wants it, come and get it!"

Indifferent

To be honest, I was a little grossed out by the thought of it.  However, there were people who commented on her post saying that they would take it!  Am I the weird one for thinking this is a little *off*, or is this a normal thing that momma's do??  have y'all heard of this before?

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Re: giving your bambino someone else's breastmilk?!

  • If I couldn't BF, and I knew the mom and her health history, I'd much rather DS get BM than formula.
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  • imagemabenner1:
    If I couldn't BF, and I knew the mom and her health history, I'd much rather DS get BM than formula.

    Yes I agree

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  • 102007102007 member
    shrug. Donor breastmilk is pretty common for NICU babies.
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  • I know someone who was a self-proclaimed "milk cow" and pumped a lot while still BFing. She gave it to another mom who's son was a little younger. I don't think I would choose to do this for myself/my child but I don't think it's weird. 
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  • I TOTALLY agree with you.  It is a little weird to randomly list free breast milk on FB.  Even if I knew the mother I would still be hesitant to take someones breast milk, as there can be alot of things that people do/have that they dont broadcast to everyone.  I know there are breast milk banks, which I am totally fine with because the mothers and the milk go through a screening process when it is donated. This way you know the milk you are giving your child is safe and comes from a disease free mother. 

  • tfont33tfont33 member

    Go figure!  The thought seriously never occoured to me, but I guess it makes sense!  Whodathunkit!?

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  • Milk donors and banks are very common, but I would hope that these people who are replying to the FB post go through the right routes and have it screened, etc.
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  • It totally freaks me out too but I am a germaphobe and am funny about lots of things.  I do think BM is better but I don't think I would put that on FB!
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  • I am not weirded out by the concept of donor milk, I am however a little Tongue Tied about posting something like that on FB. Like some of the PP's said I might take it from someone I am close to but, other than that I would want to know that the milk is from a healthy mom.
  • skyejoskyejo member

    imageLILBIT1221:
    I am not weirded out by the concept of donor milk, I am however a little Tongue Tied about posting something like that on FB.

    My thoughts exactly.

    If I knew the person I'd so be down with using her breastmilk.  I think it's great that she's donating it because it costs and arm and a leg to buy it from a donor bank.

  • It is a little weird, I think it might be better for her to donate it to a milk bank.

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  • never heard of it. very strange.
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  • It's technically called a Wet Nurse and it was common during the Slavery period in America. They would use Slaves or hire them out to feed their babies. I know that HIV can be passed through breastmilk so I would probably never do it myself. But actually, my mom breastfed my cousin who is a few months younger than me for a while because my aunt was still figuring out how to breastfeed correctly and couldn't give her enough milk. I guess that situation is okay. 
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  • imagejfresh:

    imageLILBIT1221:
    I am not weirded out by the concept of donor milk, I am however a little Tongue Tied about posting something like that on FB. Like some of the PP's said I might take it from someone I am close to but, other than that I would want to know that the milk is from a healthy mom.

    This. Donor milk over FB=weird Donor milk through the right source=Yes

    Exactly....  When I first heard of donor milk I was kinda weirded out BUT then realized that is exactly what used to happen with wet nurses so it's not a new concept.

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  • kelnyckelnyc member
    It's actually quite normal in the fact that there are substantial breastmilk donation databases for such things. Just getting a bottle from a friend does seem a little odd to me, but I wouldn't judge anyone for it.
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  • image102007:
    shrug. Donor breastmilk is pretty common for NICU babies.

    If I can pump enough, I fully intend to donate mine. 

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  • Tash13Tash13 member
    imagelollypop1989:

    imagemabenner1:
    If I couldn't BF, and I knew the mom and her health history, I'd much rather DS get BM than formula.

    Yes I agree

    Yep!  And I would donate my milk to a NICU.  I don't see the big deal as long as you know the mother's health history.

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  • sosophsosoph member

    imageCoUnTryBB1:
    It totally freaks me out too but I am a germaphobe and am funny about lots of things.  I do think BM is better but I don't think I would put that on FB!

    The level of bacteria in pumped milk goes down as it sits out due to antibodies. It's also the only body fluid not considered a bio-hazard. And, your kid is going to eat things waay germier than someone else's breastmilk, so get ready.

    It's an odd approach, but there are also Fb pages (human milk 4 human babies) just for this purpose.

  • broomybroomy member

    I wish I had known about milk banks when I was having so much trouble breastfeeding DS. I still don't even know if there are any in my area, but I intend to ask if I have supply problems again.

    Not sure if I would take it over facebook, though. I'd feel more comfortable getting screened milk. But free BF is awesome, so I guess it would depend on who was offering.

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  • I gave away a bunch of my milk to a couple close friends and cousins because I was an over producer!  If my LO was on BM and I couldn't produce enough and I knew someone that had some and knew a little bit about them I would use theirs!
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  • Yep, you're the weird one. 

    Donated breastmilk is still > formula 

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  • I donated my milk regularly from the time DS was born until he was 15 months old.  I chose to donate to a public milk bank where all the recipients had prescriptions for the milk.  As someone pointed out, milk from a milk bank is pricey (partly to pay for the screening and quality control), but sometimes insurance will cover it, and most milk banks have charitable funds to help with expenses.  I was very happy with my choice and plan to donate to the same milk bank once DD is born.  

    Actually, I just read that the AAP updated their policy on breastfeeding to state that all preemies who cannot receive milk from their own mothers should receive donor human milk.  Breast milk is best for all babies, but the benefits for preemies in particular are HUGE.

    I had a friend who asked if I would give her some milk.  She was going back to work and didn't have an adequate freezer stash.  I felt weird about that because (A) giving her milk meant less for the milk bank and (B) by that point, her child was nearly a year old and I felt that she could do part formula and part breastmilk w/o any harm to her baby.  I did give it to her.  Once.  After that, I told her I couldn't supply milk for both her and the milk bank.  So, yeah, I find posting about your milk on FB to be weird, and I honestly think I would use formula before accepting non-screened milk from someone, even a friend.  I'm very big on breastfeeding (my DS never had so much as a drop of formula, and I nursed him for over 2 yrs).  I would have a really tough time if I couldn't nurse my baby, but I believe formula is a perfectly acceptable alternative for healthy, term babies when the mom simply can't breastfeed.

    If anyone wants to learn more about milk banks and why donor milk is necessary for sick or premature babies, a great resource is the Human Milk Banking Association of North America.

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  • Not weird at all. I donated breastmilk to two moms I connected with on FB (through Human Milk 4 Human Babies). My milk was not screened and neither baby had any problem with it.

    If I couldn't breastfeed for whatever reason, I would seek donor milk before using formula. And yes, I would probably find donors on Facebook.

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  • steverstever member
    imagelollypop1989:

    imagemabenner1:
    If I couldn't BF, and I knew the mom and her health history, I'd much rather DS get BM than formula.

    Yes I agree

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  • Thai527Thai527 member
    I am a NICU nurse so the concept is not foreign at all and can be life saving. It is odd to exchange BM among FB friends or friends in general. Milk from donor banks is appropriately screened and stored. Even milk from a 'close friend' is scary to me. There are many friends who don't discuss medical history or share that info with one another. What if they don't even know they have a disease yet? Formula is not poison...tainted BM/blood/bodily fluid can be.
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  • I couldn't do it.
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  • byrne15byrne15 member
    I personally would never give my child someone else's BM.  For more than one reason.

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  • TwizzleTwizzle member

    I was a milk donor when I was BFing because my freezer was overflowing.  I did have to complete a screening and blood test to do it though.  It was great because they provided bottles and would even come to my house to pick it up.  I plan to do it again this time.

    I would donate to a friend who needed it or take a donation from a friend if I was in dire need.  But I don't think FB is the right place to do it.   

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  • I think after you breastfeed for awhile you stop thinking of it as booby-juice and more of just like milk like you'd get from a cow.  If I knew the person and wanted extra milk for my kid, I'd be fine with it. 
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  • Hopefully I'm never faced with that decision, but I would definitely use donor milk over formula as long as the donor was screened thoroughly & adhered to basic safety guidelines when pumping (sterilizing before each session, using new containers, freezing promptly, handwashing, limiting alcohol/caffeine, etc). I had a huge oversupply though so I'm not really anticipating the need for a donor.

    I had several hundred ounces in the freezer when DS decided he wasn't going to take a bottle no matter what, so I donated them. It was a good feeling to know I was helping another mom/baby pair out. As a mother, I would never donate BM that I wouldn't want my own son to drink & I think this is probably the mentality of the donors who would offer their own BM.

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  • I personally would not take it from ANYONE from facebook, even if she was a realllly close friend. If I had a twin sister, I might consider it, if we were close. I don't think I would take it from a donation center either. I might give breast milk, seeing as breast feeding can greatly reduce your chances for breast cancer the longer you breast feed.

    I used to work in childcare and one of the teachers was feeding one of the babies a bottle of breast milk. Somehow, she mixed up the bags and didn't even look at the bags to see whose name was on it, and fed the baby (boy) one of her neices bags of breast milk. Obviously, that is a HUGE issue in a child care setting. The teacher almost got fired for it. But that's a different story. If something like this happened to me or my child, I would pull my baby out of that daycare. It just hit all my wrong buttons.

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  • I really don't see the big deal with donated milk acquired privately or through something like HM4HB.  These women are breastfeeding their own children, right?  I really doubt that women with communicable diseases or who are using drugs (legal or not) that are incompatible with breastfeeding would offer milk to other mothers.  I'm sure the vast, vast majority of women who care enough about breastfeeding to donate to other moms can be trusted to provide healthy milk.  Let's give each other a little credit.

    It might feel a little strange the first time feeding another woman's milk to my daughter, but certainly no weirder than feeding her a bottle of water with some powder mixed in.  And when you think about it, what's more strange: feeding your kid milk from another woman or milk from another species?

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