What's the protocol if someone gets a BFP? Is it ok to announce here?

janabananac · May 2012

I don't have a BFP but if I did, I would be reluctant to share it on this board, I know how hard it can be to see those around you getting KU. Although, if it is someone on this board it means that they had TTTC and made it through so maybe it's inspiring?

I was just wondering how this is handled. I imagine this is a problem we would all like to have.

tombomb84 · May 2012

Typically, people who are new to the board are asked to refrain from posting their BFPs. It is hard to be happy for someone that is not part of the community yet. Also, a warning in the title is appropriate so that those that are having a bad IF day can avoid the post if they want.

MsGMChick · May 2012

tombomb84:
Typically, people who are new to the board are asked to refrain from posting their BFPs. It is hard to be happy for someone that is not part of the community yet. Also, a warning in the title is appropriate so that those that are having a bad IF day can avoid the post if they want.

Yes

kristykay123 · May 2012

I'm glad you posted this. Not that I'll be getting one anytime soon but it's good to know.

tombomb84 · May 2012

kristykay123:
I'm glad you posted this. Not that I'll be getting one anytime soon but it's good to know.

I hope that isn't true, KK. I am going to be optimistic for you!

ShelleyBQ · May 2012

I absolutely understand the idea behind this, but I am curious how "new" or "old" you have to be to not offend people? I don't anticipate a BFP anytime soon (though I'm hoping) but I try to be a part of the community as much as possible, despite only having been around for a couple months. Even so, I don't think people really "know" me.

notquiteblushing · May 2012

The best I've been able to discern is:

1. Don't post a BFP if you haven't been a member for at least two months

2. Don't post a BFP if you haven't been TTCing a year, diagnosis or not

3. Don't post a BFP if you get KU on your first treatment cycle unless you joined the community a few months before that happened

4. Joining the community means people know who you are and stuff, you post at least a few times a week.

Anyway most people on this board lurk on others so it's not like you disappear into the ether when you get your BFP. If you are reluctant to post it here, you can post it on first tri and people from here and elsewhere can wish you well elsewhere.

LollipopsAndCrisps · May 2012

I obviously don't speak for everyone around here, but I'd say that, if you feel like you have to ask whether to post your BFP here, you shouldn't.

I don't plan on doing so, if or when that time comes, just because I'm not a reg over here.

maggie2324 · May 2012

On the IF board, it is standard to announce with a benign post title like "Beta #1" or "So I POAS this morning..." NOT to say "I'm so happy!!!!! (BFP)"

I think that is the best and most respectful way to do it, in addition to the things PPs said.

kristykay123 · May 2012

tombomb84:

kristykay123:
I'm glad you posted this. Not that I'll be getting one anytime soon but it's good to know.

I hope that isn't true, KK. I am going to be optimistic for you!

Thanks Big Smile I need it!

MJ14323 · May 2012

sctiger52408:
I have been on the board for a few months and just had my second IUI, but I won't make a BFP post. I might just say something in one of the check ins that I got a BFP and can be removed from the check in list (don't know the etiquette for that though), but I will probably just quietly move on and will be removed from the check in after I go for a few weeks without posting. I'd rather be safe than sorry and not be insensitive.

This.

maggie2324 · May 2012

sctiger52408:
I have been on the board for a few months and just had my second IUI, but I won't make a BFP post. I might just say something in one of the check ins that I got a BFP and can be removed from the check in list (don't know the etiquette for that though), but I will probably just quietly move on and will be removed from the check in after I go for a few weeks without posting. I'd rather be safe than sorry and not be insensitive.

I wouldn't be offended if you made a BFP post because you've been around long enough and post often enough (IMO). If you don't agree, you should AT LEAST post it in a check in. That's not insensitive when you've been posting for well over a month!

mrskitton · May 2012

LollipopsAndCrisps:

I obviously don't speak for everyone around here, but I'd say that, if you feel like you have to ask whether to post your BFP here, you shouldn't.

I don't plan on doing so, if or when that time comes, just because I'm not a reg over here.

This

whoberry · May 2012

I really like to see BFP posts 99% of the time. I wish more people would feel comfortable posting them, I like to know what treatment worked for different diagnoses. Sometimes I lurk over on PAIF to get that info but most of the time I would rather not go on PAIF b/c I don't want to read the rest of the post titles.

I'm curious- if you wouldn't post your BFP would you come back and post on the Grad Check-In? What do you think the protocol is for posting there?

Edit: Fixed typo

EmilyB15 · May 2012

I personally like seeing BPF's on this board. It gives me hope that other ladies who have been struggling with infertility are getting BFP's and moving on! I think I would be really depressed if no one was ever able to move on! Every time I see one of those posts I think 'Ok, she was able to get pregnant after all of her struggling. I can do it do. Just keep trying!' It keeps me positive.

candyreesecup · May 2012

whoberry:

I really like to see BFP posts 99% of the time. I wish more people would feel comfortable posting them, I like to know what treatment worked for different diagnoses. Sometimes I lurk over on PAIF to get that info but most of the time I would rather not go on PAIF b/c I don't want to read the rest of the post titles.

I'm curious- if you wouldn't post your BFP would you come back and post on the Grad Check-In? What do you think the protocol is for posting there?

Edit: Fixed typo

This! Personally, I like to see BFP post more because it's encouraging to know ppl in similar shoes can get preg via medication, iui, etc. We haven't seen too much lately though Sad

notquiteblushing · May 2012

candyreesecup:
whoberry:

I really like to see BFP posts 99% of the time. I wish more people would feel comfortable posting them, I like to know what treatment worked for different diagnoses. Sometimes I lurk over on PAIF to get that info but most of the time I would rather not go on PAIF b/c I don't want to read the rest of the post titles.

I'm curious- if you wouldn't post your BFP would you come back and post on the Grad Check-In? What do you think the protocol is for posting there?

Edit: Fixed typo

This! Personally, I like to see BFP post more because it's encouraging to know ppl in similar shoes can get preg via medication, iui, etc. We haven't seen too much lately though

There's TWO in the IUI check in post.

ChrisH22 · May 2012

whoberry:
I really like to see BFP posts 99% of the time. I wish more people would feel comfortable posting them, I like to know what treatment worked for different diagnoses. Sometimes I lurk over on PAIF to get that info but most of the time I would rather not go on PAIF b/c I don't want to read the rest of the post titles.
I'm curious- if you wouldn't post your BFP would you come back and post on the Grad Check-In? What do you think the protocol is for posting there?
Edit: Fixed typo

I agree with this. And the other 1% of the time if I can read something in the title that gives me an idea what may be coming I just don't click on it.

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What's the protocol if someone gets a BFP? Is it ok to announce here?

Re: What's the protocol if someone gets a BFP? Is it ok to announce here?

IF, 5 losses, 1 son, 1 on the way.

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