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June 2012 Moms
MWM0903
member
Things you wish you would have known...
MWM0903
member
As my pregnancy progresses and things continue to change I think to myself, "man, I wish someone would have told me about that". There are so many things that happen when you are pregnant that no one tells you about, not even the books. What are the things you wish someone would have warned you about before you experienced it on your own? I will start...
I wish someone would have told me that as your belly gets bigger it gets more difficult to wipe your butt!
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Re: Things you wish you would have known...
This is my second pregnancy, so there aren't any huge suprises on the pregnancy front. But for after the baby is born I wish I had known:
1. Baby blues are real, and they're nothing to be ashamed of. I had these images of the whole world dissapearing when they placed DS into my arms as I would be consumed with love. Yes I loved him, but I also felt numb and unattached. I was ashamed of my feelings and didnt' talk to anyone about them. I especially didnt' want DH to know because I was afraid he would think I was a bad mother (which couldn't have been further from the truth!). My mom finally caught on and called me out. It wasn't until I started talking about it that I started feeling better. This time, I'll know what signs to look out for.
2. Breastfeeding is effing HARD! You'd think that since we've been doing this since the beginning of time, it would be easy. But, bleeding and black and blue nipples are a reality for many breastfeeding moms. It did get better, but it took 3 visits to the lactation consultant and 3 weeks of blood, sweat and tears to get there.
Lol- It gets even harder to wipe if you get hemmies.
This is a great idea! I wish someone would have told me about:
-Healing- I was not prepared for the bleeding, pads, stiches, peri bottle, sitz baths and generally feeling like I had a bowling ball sewn to my backside.
-Meconium- basically the first few poos are like extremely sticky tar bubbles. Probably the only use for baby oil I can think of is to remove it.
- The "suicide" hour- It's actually more like three hours and it's normally around dinner time (though with DS it was 9pm-midnight). He screamed and nothing I did would help, no feeding, swinging anything helped. This was every night for the first 8-9 weeks.
-How hard Bfing is for many women. Between latching, supply issues, engorgement, mastitis etc...it can be really tough. Was so glad someone did tell me about nipple sheilds. They were a life saver! I Bfed with them for the first 6 months until LO could latch on his own.
My belly hasn't itched once. I think I used the cream once, just to see what the fuss was about. Ehh, nothing to write home about.
This for after the baby comes.
For birth, I wish someone would have told me that your water breaks OVER and OVER again. And, that it's a completely nasty experience.
Haha! I keep joking with my husband that I need help. HAHAHAHAHA!
He said he's going to get me one of those sticks that you attach the toilet paper to. You know, the ones that you can find in the Carol Wright catalogs. lmao
Haha...This for sure!
Blessed with our beautiful girl May 30/2012 - BFP June 20th/2013 - Naturally MC June 30th/13.
BFP Aug 1/2013
This! The first few times I had growing pains I was scared shirtless. And since no one told me it could feel like you were being stabbed over and over again I had to keep calling my MW to talk me down from my tree so she could tell me I wasn't about to mc. Now I'm like, "ah stabbing pain again? Guess I'll go be useless for a couple of hours til it passes, whatever. "
Also my second pregnancy so real surprises here, although being pregnant with a toddler at home is much harder.
For after giving birth there are 2 things I wish I would have known.
1st: For the first few weeks everytime you cough or sneeze you might pee a little, the pads are for more than just bleeding.
2nd: Breastfeeding is HARD. For me it was very emontionally hard, DD had lots of latching issues and almost everytime we would try she would get very pissed, It was very hard to here her cry in frustration.
That once your water breaks you will keep leaking and leaking...yeah gross
Getting the internal catheter to monitor contractions hurt like hell to get inserted. I had this done before my epidural and I think it is the one part of labor that had me in tears.
The night sweats that came after giving birth.
To seek assistance sooner for PPD/PPA.
Another vote for how hard BF'ing is. I shed many tears the first week or so over it. But, it will get easier if you have a good support system and keep working on it.
Goodbye little angel(7/22/2011)....see you in heaven
Goodbye my second angel (9/18/2011)
Aparently I am the only woman on earth who didn't know morning sickness could last all day and could last all pregnancy. Luckily it didn't last all pregnancy but I was still suffering up until 18 weeks. I had a number of women in my life who had experienced ms but they never told me about it.
I wish someone would have told me I will feel a heavy head pressing against my vagina. All I kept hearing was "wait till he starts kicking your ribs" which is nothing compared to the griding he likes to do against my cervix!
I wish I knew that my energy would suddenly go away on the 3rd tri. I was doing great until last week or so.
I wish I knew that every single time someone sees me they would make comments about my body and estimates on LO's size without being asked...
Definitely this! It is not okay to talk about a woman's weight or shape - even during pregnancy. For some stupid reason people think pregnancy means free range to say whatever stupid thought they have in their head. And why is that we put up with it? (Can you tell I'm super hormonal today?) But fo' realz why do we feel such a need to respond politely or gently ignore people who are flat out being rude to us?
Factor V Leiden Homozygous, Advanced Maternal Age
TTC #1, 5 yrs, PCOS, Femera + Ovidrel.
IUI#3 BFP, DD 5/31/2012
TTC #2, 2 yrs, PCOS, Femera+Ovidrel
IUI#2 BFP!
Totally forgot about those!
STM here too, so again not a lot of surprises except that this pregnancy is so not like my first. So here are mine for after birth:
1) I totally agree with PP about the baby blues. Anything and EVERYTHING made me cry after DS was born. There were times I thought I was cracking up and my poor DH didn't know what to do to help me. I told him to just leave me alone and let me cry. My poor friend called me a few days after I got home and I burst in to tears the moment I picked up the phone.
2) The constipation after a c-section is horrific, I've never experienced anything like it. I would have rather have given birth naturally 10 times over than endure the pain of the first bowel movement after my surgery.
3) I agree with PP about breastfeeding too. It is hard, although I was totally prepared to not do it if it didn't work out for us. I supplemented in the hospital and will do so again, and my son still breastfed until 4 months (when I went back to work and couldn't keep up with the pumping, I'm going to work on my stash much earlier with this baby). This time around I am not going to let them be so quick to use the shield because it was a PIA to always have a clean one to use when I was nursing DS. I'd rather not have to use one if I don't need to.
4) And finally, I wish I had known not to be so adamant about certain things before DS was born. For example the whole "I researched what I have on my registry and am upset I didn't get it" stuff (this was not a complaint I had, but I see it come up a lot on this board). I can't tell you how many trips we made to BRU to get different items because what I thought I wanted totally didn't work for us. Or, the things I didn't think were necessary that I became life savers. I have been through several bathtubs and have a pack n' play that never got touched because they were what I thought I needed, but didn't end up being what worked for us. I have bags of binkies that we tried out before we found one he liked. Before DS was born, I swore he would sleep in his crib from day 1...no ifs, ands, or buts about it. DH and I came home and we both looked at each other and said "where's he going to sleep?". It took us about a week to find the rock n' play which is where DS slept until he was 4 months old and transitioned to the crib. And don't even get me started on how many strollers we've been through...
Buy maternity clothes AS SOON as you need them. I waited and waited and one day, literally none of my clothes fit. I got to spend like 60 bucks on clothes I will wear for 10 weeks.
I wish I had bought some comfy nursing bras (like the sleeping kind) when I first got pregnant. I had to buy all new bras when I got pregnant, now I feel like I have to go buy all new nursing bras- I have one and I am waiting to make sure I can do it before getting more!
Drinking water is really important- that would have saved me some worry and guilt around 20 weeks.
1. Don't be shocked if at your first check up for LO and the Dr/Pedi tells you that the babies clavical/collar bone is healing nicely. It's not anything uncommon for the babies collar bone to fracture during delivary when the shoulders come out.
2. The after birth pads are as thick as half the pack of diapers you have at home for LO and you won't walk or sit straight til you stop using them.
3. Again on the breastfeeding...i didn't know that while even pumping you can aggrivate the scabbing on your nipples and you can pump "PINK" milk. Yes ladies, it's blood in the milk. Pump & dump that batch but don't unlatch LO if you think you're nipples are bleeding. Lactation consultant said the babie saliva keeps the blood from entering their system.
4. Last but not least...after you have the baby (if vaginally at least) you will feel like everything you have inside of you is going to fall out through your vajay jay. It's more pressure than you feel now. I convienced myself it was gravity pulling my organs back where they belong.
That I would be so TIRED. And there is nothing I can do about it. It's a deep in my bones can't get myself motivated fatigue. Like the baby is literally sucking the life out of me.
That even the most basic movements-getting off the couch, turning over in bed, reaching for the water-would be a struggle. And that going up and down the stairs would cause me to sound like I just ran a marathon.
That I would hate maternity clothes and my baby weight so much. I seriously loath them both. I dread getting dressed in the morning, and want to cry when I think about how I look right now. I feel like I have a great body image, but this pregnancy has done a number on my self confidence. I can hardly look in a mirror without wanted to run away.
That I would loose my taste for things I love, like Chipotle. I still can't think of getting a burrito from there without gagging. Thanks, morning sickness.
That finding a boy's name would be so dang difficult. We're terrified that we'll be leaving the hospital, and the only name we'll have is Baby U. Yikes!
That baby's kicks and punches would HURT! And that he would be pushing on my ribs which HURTS! I had no idea-I thought it was this great joyful thing to feel the baby. Nope, he HURTS.
That the time at the end would drag by so slowly.
Running Blog
My oh my can I relate to many of these posts! I'm so glad I read this because many of these comments have me rolling with laughter and I severely needed it today! This is my 2nd so I feel like I'm more prepared.
-Definitely sitting on the toilet to throw up in the trash can, not to mention "tinkling" a wee bit every time I cough, sneeze, etc.
-Baby movement hurts like heck! and the pressure on your cervix and arse from the inside is insane!
-The after birth experience- felling like your lady bits were flipped inside out and flapping in the wind. The lower half of my body felt like a deflated balloon for a couple of days.
-How painful PPD actually is and it's ok to get help-unfortunately I didn't and severely suffered through it without realizing what it was.
-BFing isn't for everyone and it is ok- breast feeding may be healthy for babies, but if it doesn't work...then it simply doesn't work.
Ha! I feel your pain on this one!!! I have peed on the floor so many times from the exertion of vomiting or even just dry heaving.... bleh!
i kind of wish people would stop telling me things. I have three aunts who are convinced that im a teenage mother and know nothing about babies (i'm 23 and am great with babies).
Also, i wish i knew that leaning backwards makes you dizzy. im 35 weeks now and even leaning back on the couch makes me feel very very bad.
Yes, this!