Need some advice (preg. mentioned, not mine)

foxxy1 · May 2012

My cousin invited DH and I to her college graduation in June. She's currently two months pregnant and will be close to four when I see her again.

I want to go to her graduation and I know a lot of our extended family will be there as well. It'll also be the first major appearance we'll have since Ethan's birthday (we really kept to ourselves these past few months). Everyone knows the story with Ethan and my cousin and her husband came to his memorial. Even though there's a bit of an age difference between us (I'm older by 10 years), we're pretty close.

Does anyone have any advice? Her graduation is six weeks away so I'm trying to mentally prepare myself. We also have Ethan's godmother's wedding the following weekend where we'll also see another pregnant couple so I'm trying to mentally prepare for that as well. Ethan's godmother did say she understood if we didn't go but I really want to support her because we've been friends since middle school and she's helped me a whole lot throughout the years.

Ugh. I'm still getting used to this new normal.

Petunia844 · May 2012

I'm sorry it's so hard to get used to, and I totally understand. I will say that at 4 months she probably won't really look very pregnant, and I'm not sure why...but for me that helps. I can also say that in most cases the anticipation of having to do things like this is always worse than the actual event. Normally I feel a weight lifted, like "ok, I did that...and I'm ok." I hope it goes ok for you. ((hugs))

Heatherhah · May 2012

I know for me with my SIL and DH's cousin I was okay seeing them when they weren't further along. It hurts a ton now seeing them so pregnant and knowing that I was struggling to get pregnant was hard after losing Sydney. But I think Petunia is right it is harder sometimes in our minds then it actually is to see the person. Good luck with what ever you decide.

Heather

magdalina.h · May 2012

If it were me, I would go. These are two milestones that can't be redone, like a family BBQ. The preparation is usually a lot worse than the event. If you have to have a melt down, have a melt down. Everyone should understand. If they don't, they deserve to be punched

foxxy1 · May 2012

Thanks, ladies! I'll update everyone how everything goes. Chances are, we'll probably go to both. The graduation is in San Diego so it'll be a nice time to get away for a weekend. She graduates at 8 in the morning so that would leave the rest of the day to ourselves once she's done.

johnnys june · May 2012

magdalina.h:
If it were me, I would go. These are two milestones that can't be redone, like a family BBQ. The preparation is usually a lot worse than the event. If you have to have a melt down, have a melt down. Everyone should understand. If they don't, they deserve to be punched

This!!! And what Petunia said. I think the anticipation is way worse than the event.