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adopting after bio children w/ special needs

Jenny952Jenny952 member
in Adoption

I hope it's ok to post here.  I have a 5-month old baby who was born with a birth defect.  It's not a genetic condition, but DH and I are still very concerned about having another bio child, as the odds are greater that future children could have this same condition.  We would like more kids, and we've started talking more about adoption.  Has anyone been in a similar situation?  Want to tell me about how you made your decision?

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Re: adopting after bio children w/ special needs

  • CaptainSeriousCaptainSerious member
    I'm sorry your little one was born with special needs.  Without knowing more details, all I can say is that it's perfectly natural to want to turn to adoption as a means of having more children without the same condition.  I just want to caution you that adoption is in no way a guarentee against having a child with special needs, especially if you are considering domestic, infant adoption, in which most families are matched during the pregnancy.  Even in cases of older child adoption, you may not always be aware of special needs until they arrive later in life.  I adopted my oldest when he was 7, and although we knew about his most serious condition (needed immediate cardiac surgery), it wasn't for another year or so until we discovered he had dyslexia.  Similarly, we knew my youngest might have a condition known as neurofibromatosis, but all our independent research didn't tell us that 25 to 50 percent of children with the condition have learning disabilities (we adopted him when he was 5).  In addition, there are other issues that come along with adoption that you should consider before making this choice.  adoption is a wonderful way to build a family, but I just wanted you to know that it, like any time you add to a family, includes risks.  Whatever you decide, I wish you the best, and am happy to answer any questions related to adoption or my limited knowledge of getting help for special ed kids.
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  • KathWKathW

    I am in a similar situation. I am curious as to the Birth Defect. My son was born with a serious Defect, Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia. The cause is unknown and many drs say it isn't genetic, but the odds increase dramatically of having another baby with CDH once you have one. 

     We have decided to not have any more natural children and are currently foster parents. We hope that someday it will lead us to a child eligible for adoption, but are ok if it doesn't and it is just the 3 of us. 

    Katherine Proud Mommy and Foster Mommy
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