How do YOU bedshare? — The Bump
Attachment Parenting

How do YOU bedshare?

Our intention was to have our daughter in the arms reach, but she's here and I can't sleep with her that far away and she doesn't do well on her own either so she sleeps snuggled up with me. 

I'm just curious how do others sleep with their babies? I read someone say they couldn't lay on your arm until they're older, but that's where my little girl has been since day 1, so is that just a personal comfort thing? How do you sleep? =)

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Re: How do YOU bedshare?

  • My DDs always layed on my chest while sleeping, or I would lay them in the crook of my arm and kind of curl around them [if you can picture that]. Sounds like what you are doing. That's how #3 will sleep as well!
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  • image dmfan897:
    My DDs always layed on my chest while sleeping, or I would lay them in the crook of my arm and kind of curl around them [if you can picture that]. Sounds like what you are doing. That's how #3 will sleep as well!

    This is what we did as well.

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  • Give her some time, just because she's not sleeping in the co-sleeper at this point doesn't mean she won't later on. I used to nurse my kids down, and then move them away from me into their own spot (we have a king-size bed), something like that might work with her. When they get bigger, then they tend to sleep in the space under my armpit (if I'm lying on my side and my arm is up under my head). They were both big side-sleepers, too.
    DS1 - Feb 2008

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  • When DS was a newborn he often slept on my chest or curled up in my arm. Once he was a little bigger he slept/sleeps under my armpit. I think if her body is supported (not just her head on your arm) you should be good
  • DS slept on my chest until about 6 weeks when it started not seeming as comfy for him. He likes back sleeping so he sleeps on his back next to me. I tend to need to change position frequently which sometimes wakes him up so I have taken to sleeping 'below' him, kinda curled around him from the bottom instead of the top how most mamas seem to. Works quite well for us and eases any lingering fears I have of rolling on him.
  • When DD was little she slept on my chest. After a few weeks she started sleeping next to me while I curled around her. I also couldn't stand having her so far away. She now refuses to sleep in bed with us. She likes her own space and I miss her. 
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  • When she was a newborn she was curled up in my arm, almost like a cradle hold but laying beside me, if that makes sense. After a couple months she just laid on her own, usually at least a foot away from me. We have a queen-size and it was just the two of us on it, DH slept on a separate bed beside us.
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  • image dmfan897:
    My DDs always layed on my chest while sleeping, or I would lay them in the crook of my arm and kind of curl around them [if you can picture that]. Sounds like what you are doing. That's how #3 will sleep as well!

     

    This is what I do, I wear a long sleve shirt and keep blankets around my waist. I usually have her sleep in the crook of my arm and curl my legs by her feet then put my other arm over her stomach. Now that she is getting older she doesnt always sleep in the crook of my arm.

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  • image pepomntpat:
    When DD was little she slept on my chest. After a few weeks she started sleeping next to me while I curled around her. I also couldn't stand having her so far away. She now refuses to sleep in bed with us. She likes her own space and I miss her. 

    Oh my Goodness I so agree..DD1 still bedshare with us but DD2 only wanted to cosleep until she was about 2 months old!!! Now she sleeps in her own crib in her room. Which is great that she sleeps so well by herself but I missed out on some serious snuggles! 

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  • vitanvitan
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    Like pp DD slept on my chest. Well, when she was first born, there wasn't much sleeping cuz she would sleep on my husband's chest while he was awake & I slept and vice versa. When she got a little older, I slept curled around her and she would sleep on her side nursing. That's how we still sleep but she latches off and sleeps on her back.
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  • At what age is it ok for them to sleep with their head on your arm? My LO has been doing this quite a bit, I didn't know it wasn't ok. 

    Is this a "bad for their body" issue, or a potential suffocation risk? 

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  • She started in a cradle next to our bed but that didn't last long. The cradle is gone now and she sleeps next to me. I try to put her on her back but she likes to turn towards me and put her feet on my belly. In the past month or so sometimes I've been putting her in the crook of my arm when I nurse her and we'll both fall back asleep like that but it kinda hurts my arm so most of the time I prefer to just have her next to me. I think it is a personal comfort thing.
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  • DS slept on my chest for the first two months or so and then on his side next to me to nurse with my arm around him.  With DD she slept next to me and then would unlatch and lay on her back, she'd be between DH and so after the first few months I was able to roll over and actually get comfortable instead of killing my shoulder every night for two years trying to cradle her like I did with DS. 

    Now DD just comes into bed when she wakes up in the middle of the night and usually settles in and decides she's comfortable sprawled sideways across my face or taking up all the pillows.

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  • DS slept on our chests until about 2.5  months when all of the sudden he decided he wanted the co-sleeper. He is in his crib now, but we do bedshare for naps (hey mom and dad need naps too!). Now, I nurse him on my side and I scoot away from him when he is done.
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  • Now it's a free-for-all since LO is mobile but he used to sleep laying next to me, his head at boob-level for "easy access" and me on my side facing him.


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  • LO slept with me, on his side curled up facing me under my outstretched arm, or on his back until about 2 weeks ago... Now we have side carred our crib and he sleeps very well in that.
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  •  I struggled with him in the bassinet, then RnP for the first 2 months.  Finally, I gave up after having to put him back down (sometimes taking up to an hour) up to a couple of times an hour, I gave up and brought him in bed with me.  I sleep on my side curled around him and he sleeps snuggled up on my breast. He is under my armpit with his legs draped over one of my legs. 
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