XP: Anyone have a 3+ yr old who's still PTing?

kpips20 · May 2012

I posted this on the PT board but that board's dead. I thought maybe you ladies can help! I feel like the only mom whose 3 year old isn't fully trained yet. DS will go for 3-4 days where he's great - no accidents, takes himself to the potty or tells me he has to ge etc. Then all of a sudden he'll have 2-3 days where he'll have multiple accidents a day, especially if he's in the middle of doing something fun. He still refuses to poop on the potty and still wakes up in a soaked pull up in the am. I've tried every meathod under the sun and I'm not buying the "he's not ready" argument b/c he goes days without accidents. We've done sticker charts, M&Ms, etc and nothing seems to work long term. At this point I'm at a loss.

DTNZ4Ever · May 2012

DS is like that. He has been in underwear full time for about 3-4 months now. He will goes days with no accidents during waking hours then will have two accidents in a day. Poop the majority of the time happens in his pull up at naps or bedtime. He will poop on the potty but he has always had poopy diapers after nap and first thing in the morning so it seems to be his time. He is always soaked in the morning. He will occassionally have a dry diaper at nap time but normally he does not. Our pedi stated that over night dryness can take until 5 years old. I know my DS sometimes gets too busy and that is when he has an accident. I am normally on him every 2 or so hours to go potty if he does not initiate but sometimes we both forget. It is a process and it takes longer for boys. You are not alone don't get frustrated and just keep doing what you are doing.

ss+el · May 2012

Mine is just finally in underwear as of 2 weeks ago. He has only had 2 pee accidents since, but refuses to poop on the potty. I'm just chalking it up to still not being quite ready. He also has no example to aspire to, as most of the kids he plays with are neighbors, running around the yard, so it's not obvious to him when they're stopping to go use the bathroom.

Sorry, no amazing advice, we've tried rewards, undies cold turkey, etc. too. The thing that got him was visiting his cousins out of state. We told him there were no diapers or frog potty at their house, so he had no choice.

Just wanted to let you know, you're absolutely not alone.

Sawyerplus1 · May 2012

I don't really have any tips for you, but just wanted to say you're not alone. We didn't even start PTing DS until last august when he was 3.5. It was just the right timing for him.

Have you talked to his pedi about reasons he may be having trouble with consistency? A few tips I can think of (that you no doubt know) include: going to undies full time (except at night, if he needs them) including nap time, reward using the potty (we used gummy bears for pee and chocolates for poo, but it's important to know what will entice your LO), remind/ask/take him constantly, limit his fluid intake and/or closely monitor it, and make him clean up his messes (he has to take off his pants and underwear, put them in the laundry, get clean clothes, get a towel, wipe up his mess, etc. It's not punishment, but a part of the responsibility of making a mess like that).

Good luck to you!

kpips20 · May 2012

Thanks for the advice ladies. It's nice to know DS isn't the only one taking his weet time. I swear I'm going to deck the next mom who tells me their 2 year old PT'd in 2 days!

Brewtowngrl · May 2012

Normal. What worked for BM for us: I told DS I didn't care if he pooped in a diaper or pull up, but to ask me for one. Then i told him that he needed to poop in the pull up in the bathroom. Eventually he got on schedule for pooping so I knew that at 1pm it was time. I would ask him to try and sit on the potty for a few minutes and then he could have his pull up. One day I was so busy with DS2 that I ignored him for awhile. He closed the door and did it. Before that I was making a big deal about going, but really the kid just wanted some privacy to do his business. He never had a poop accident after that. We also had the Thomas Roundhouse on the fridge as his reward for going on the potty finally.

There is nothing you can do for night time. That is a development thing. Once he is ready he will start to stay dry. DS wore underjams every night till about a month ago. He liked the security even though he didn't ever wet it.

KarBear · May 2012

Yes. DD has been pee trained for a few months, but still has the occasional accident. She is far away from poop trained, though. Just last weekend we got her to poop on the toilet for the first time, but not since then. I'm really trying to be patient and not make it a big deal, but it is frustrating.

rsd12 · May 2012

While my oldest was potty trained at 2 yrs 9 months, it took him a year to go poop on the potty. It was painful, but we had to step back and let him tell us he was ready... once we relaxed, he did too! Of couse I potty trained my younger guys at 25 months (he was awesome) and the littlest at 28 months (he has more poop accidents than the other two combined). My oldeest stopped wanting a night time training pant at 4yrs old, my middle guy (he is 4) is no where ready, my littlest guy does not wear one and never wakes up wet.

Karma1969 · May 2012

My DS will be 4 in July and we are still working on it. He's wearing Pull Ups at night and still has a few accident during the day, especially if he's busy doing something.

I remind him all the time and I amlways make him go and try before moving onto a new activity. He tells me that I'm annoying him.

NJLH · May 2012

My girls are 3.5 and I'm having a rough, rough time. Its getting to be embarrassing since they're the oldest in their class and still in pullups. They have zero interest. You name it...I've tried it. Somethings gotta give soon.

fromvatobk · May 2012

Not only are you not alone, you are light years ahead of us here. DS is in pull-ups full time and will use the potty for the most part when prompted, but will not ask to use it and often insists he doesn't have to go. Sometimes he gets engrossed in what he is doing and just forgets the urge. He will poop on the potty sometimes and be so proud of himself for that, but will then also resists the suggestions to sit on it when he looks like he has to poop. For us, I think it really is a matter of his mind/body controls catching up a little and so we are consistently trying and reinforcing. Hopefully, he will just take off with it soon! AT least that is what I keep telling myself. Good luck to you.

ToBeMrsT · May 2012

No real advice, but you're definitely not alone. DS didn't potty train until right at 4. He just didn't care and now even though he is potty trained he still doesn't really care. He holds it forever, but he doesn't have accidents so I guess it's success...

akayf · May 2012

My son just turned 4 in March. He finally was potty trained a couple days after his birthday. He was trained for pee for several months before that but refused to poop in the toilet. He would hold it for ages and then finally hide in a corner whenever we were completely busy with something else.(like changing the baby's diaper or when I was cooking dinner) We had him underwear for awhile even though he was still pooping in his pants because if we used a pull up, he got lazy with peeing.

One day he finally just decided enough was enough and finally was trained.

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