Hi ladies! My sister is throwing us a coed shower in early June at a super cool new bar/restaurant nearby; it's very vintage-y/speakeasy style, and it will be on a Sunday afternoon from about 1 to 4pm or so. We're super excited for it!
But I have a question: is it tacky/bad form to have a cash bar? I thought it would be ok since it *is* a baby shower, and on a Sunday afternoon, if people decide to have a drink beyond what is being provided (soft drinks, coffee, tea, and tons of appetizers), then that's up to them.
But what do you think?! TIA!
Re: Co-ed Baby Shower at a Bar/Restaurant - cash bar ok?
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I side eye cash bars.
Thanks for weighing in, everyone!
It's really split pretty equally between a bar & restaurant. People come for drinks after work, then stay for dinner, and others come for dinner then move to the bar.
It's normally not open during the afternoon - however their older, more established sister bar/restaurant upstairs *is* open all day - so we'll have the place to ourselves.
I think she's going to see we they can do maybe a wine and beer or two, and maybe a bloody mary or something as an open bar, and then if people want anything beyond that, that can be cash. Good compromise?
But she is providing drinks and food. There just happens to also be the option to buy alcohol on the premises.
This is how I see it. Alcohol is never a necessity, at any function, honestly. Our wedding reception was dry because of numerous alcohol problems on each side of the family so we had an early reception to allow everyone to do what they wanted with their mid/late afternoon and evening. All food and other drinks were provided.
Especially for a baby shower, alcohol is not a necessity. I went 25 years without touching alcohol and DH has never drank. It's a little unfortunate that it's seen as something that is required at all times. There is absolutely nothing wrong with someone wanting a drink, but I don't think it's a problem to have guests buy their alcoholic drinks AS LONG AS all other beverages (not just water) and all food items are provided.
blog! thescenery.net
If the bar is set up specifically for the party... Very tacky. If its just there and open normally... Not tacky.
You should only provide what you can afford. If you can't afford it, don't have it.
I agree with this. I normally think cash bars are tacky, for weddings and such. But if you're having a party, and there happens to be a bar in another part of the restaurant, I don't think it's a big deal. I personally would provide at least wine or beer, but if people really want a drink - they can make their way to the bar.
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Here's my thing- a regular "women's only shower", I wouldn't expect alcohol and wouldn't think to order any.
However, if it was a co-ed shower, to me, that means more of a party than a shower. And as such, yes, I'd be more on the side of "expecting" some kind of alcohol. That doesn't mean open bar - but I would provide something. Wine and beer, perhaps.
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Since the party is at an actual bar, I would probably expect to be served alcohol. Can you maybe include wine or sangria in with what you're providing, or mimosas and bloody marys if it's brunch time? Then if people want something other than that, they can pay for it themselves.
Or if I'm misunderstanding and the place is really more of a restaurant that happens to have a bar, then I think it's fine to include regular drinks and have people pay for their own alcohol.
I just wanted to mention that it's not OP who will or won't be providing alcohol, it's the hostess, her sister. It seems... wrong... for OP to say, "you also need to buy all my friends alcohol." As long as you're in a space away from the bar and everyone has food and beverages, I don't think the presence of the option to wander over to the bar and buy alcohol is rude.