Working Moms

Any moms of 3 here?

I've been back to work since January and with the cost of daycare for DD1 and a nanny for the twins, most of my pay checks pay for child care.  When it's all said and done, I take home maybe $400 a month.  The biggest reason I work full time is for insurance.  I am the primary for all of the kids so we are all double covered.  I pay $88 a month for medical and dental for all of us.  But DH just got a new job and his insurance is WAY better than it was with his last employer so we are leaning toward me cutting back to part time or even quitting.  Even though I take home $400 a month, between gas, work clothes (I work in an office and have to dress professionally), lunches out, occasional stops at Starbucks, etc. I wonder if we are actually paying more out than I'm bringing home.  I really should do the math.  Anyway, just wondering if there are other moms-of-three who work full time?  Everyone (co-workers, friends, relatives, random people) think it's silly for me to work at all.
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Re: Any moms of 3 here?

  • I am!  I have to work for insurance as well because DH owns a small business and does not get insurance.  I don't pay for daycare for 3 though, so financially it is not as bad.  My oldest is 10 and in school, my mother watches my youngest during the day.  Only my 4 year old is in daycare and I get a discount on child care because my job is affiliated with his preschool.

    Would love to work part time though.  Seems like it makes sense for you to cutback if your DH can get insurance! 

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  • I work FT, and we HAD an au pair.  DH has been unemployed for 9 months so we could not continue to pay out $$ for childcare.  Here's the scoop when things were going well (and we hope to return to quickly)  DH worked FT and I worked PT (25 hours per week) we had an au pair to cover when I was at work, and the children that were preschool age (this year we have 2) go to preschool three mornings per week.  We didn't feel that they needed FT preschool and since we have the au pair at home we saved a lot of $$ just by doing M,W,F 9am-12pm.

    Right now DH and my mom watch the kids (he recently acquired a few PT jobs, but it is no where near making ends meet) and we were able to keep DS2 and DD1 in preschool for the rest of the year.

    When DH gets back to work I will probably work FT until the littlest is in preschool (hoping to be set financially) then I can cut back to PT.

    Also, if you LOVE your job, who cares if you are "breaking even" some people don't want to stay home, and if you aren't planning to continue to SAH after your kids get into school you might want to consider keeping active in your field.  It's hard to get back into some jobs when you have a huge break in employment, even if it is to care for your kids.

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  • I was working full time until two years ago.  I dropped to part time and love it.

    Can I ask why your nanny doesn't watch all three kids?  That could be a savings for you.   

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  • I believe if you were to stop working that your DH could claim head of household on your taxes and you'd get a bigger write off.  So that alone might make up for the $400 you bring home.  If someone prepares your taxes you should ask, or you could probably check online on the IRS site too.  Other things to keep in mind is that if you are home you can probably bring your grocery bill down (spending time to find deals on food and more home cooking - less eating out).

    Anyway, we are kind of in the same boat.  My salary pretty much covers daycare and school (ODD goes to private and YDD will be starting this fall) and all the money I dump into my 401k.  Unfortunately DH is self employed, so I have to carry our insurance, so that in the end is what it comes down to for us.

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  • Depends on how you feel about working. If you love your job, it's still "worth it" to work, and it's financially smarter for the long term. I'm working for insurance also (good coverage for the whole family) but my DH is self-employed, so no chance he will suddenly get good insurance on his own. When baby 3 arrives, I want/need to make a job change, even though I am nervous about it. I just do not want to keep commuting and working FT with my DH's long hours & weekend work, and three very small kids. I'd love to work PT, closer to home...but losing the insurance is a huge financial hit if we have to buy our own policy. Not 100% sure how all will work out for us but I am really hoping to make some kind of change.
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  • Why do you have daycare and a nanny?  I would rather pay the nanny a bit more and keep all 3 at home (less running around, less spent on DC).  Also, benefits are important, as my DH keeps telling me, and they do make it worth working in many cases.  Sit down and do the math.
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  • I will continue to work, but I carry the benefits with no option for DH to carry them.  And, my older 2 children are much older and out of daycare (although, summer camp isn't cheap either). 

    FWIW, you will still go out to lunch and Starbucks if you SAH or work PT, so I wouldn't really factor that into your decision.  

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  • Working full time here. My salary covers daycare and our mortgage and a few other bills. I have a great health insurance plan that we really need, and dh is only contract so we would actually be out more money if I didn't work due to ds' medication costs.

    Daycares and nannies aren't forever, so you'll have the gap in salary illiminated in time. If things are tight, drop the Starbucks. I work in a corporate office too, but I'm very concious about sticking to a clothing budget. I sometimes shop second hand and only buy on sale. 

  • imageluvmagoldn:

    I was working full time until two years ago.  I dropped to part time and love it.

    Can I ask why your nanny doesn't watch all three kids?  That could be a savings for you.   

    DH and I feel daycare is really important for DD1. She stayed home with my mom from 4 months to 18 months old. Its so important for her to be around other kids and adults. Also, it would be more expensive for her to stay with the nanny. She will charge us more to watch one more child. If we ask her to take her to preschool , she charges extra for that. And I'd have to leave my minivan at home for her so I'd need a new car to get to and from work. Overall, daycare is the better choice for DD1.
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  • I don't have 3 yet but I will be working after the twins arrive. I too carry insurance and DH's insurance is terrible. I probably bring home about $1200/mo after all is said and done but I would probably work if I brought home $400 because a) I need to get out of the house and b) I have a really good pension so while it's tempting to say the limited $ isn't worth it, in the end, it's worth it. I work in a school system so I get the benefit of being home for a few hours before dinner and have school vacations off along with a part time summer schedule. We did decide to to pull DS from full time daycare and only put him in part time to make more financial sense...in place of daycare on those days the nanny will bring him to activities with other toddlers. All that being said, if it doesn't make financial sense for you and you want to stay home then why not switch to DH's insurance and try it out or cut to part time to see if it's even something you want to do.
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  • This should be a best-interests call, not a money call.

    BUT, if you're looking that the numbers you should factor in the cost of staying home as well.

    If it is important to you that DD1 be around other kids, you will presumably keep her in some kind of preschool or class.

    You will still want to go out to eat/stop by starbucks, and you will now need to get food for the kids (or atleast DD1) on those trips as well.

    Your gas bill will likely go up if you are going around to playdates and parks.

    Unless you are really disciplined, you will probably spend more on activities (you go through a lot more playdough, stickers, etc when you are home, plus you'll want to do things like head to a museum or playplace on a rainy day) and on furnishings (when you are home, you tend to notice more things that you "need" -- whether it's a kids picnic table or new dishtowels or matching 4th of July shirts).

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  • I have 3 kids and work full time.  The money thing isn't a question b/c childcare is only about 40% of my take home plus I have great benefits (health, 401k plus match, flex spending, etc).  But to the other poster's points, you really need to factor in other benefits as well as lost pay for being out of the workforce keeping in mind that once your kids are in school, the childcare costs go way down. 
  • Daycare is about 30% of my pay during the school year and thank goodness, less next year when DS1 is in school FT (Prek4).  

    During the summer, its typical 50% of my income; however, I am looking into the boys and girls club (right in front of my work) for DD during the summer.  Its so much cheaper ($12/summer) and no income guidelines.  We are going to go check it out...

    It's still worth it for me since I still bring home majority of my income and MH also is a small business owner and I carry our insurance also.   I also have a 401K and other benefits (don't forget to factor those).  I can tell you my grocery bill is higher when I staying at home with the kids.  Seriously 2 days worth of sandwhiches = 1 loaf of bread.   We also do more activities because we get bored in the house...


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