Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

all the tests were just "wrong".

I POAS tuesday, got a faint line so I POAS Wednesday and Thursday and got BFP's. I had one test left, so just for fun I POAS sunday morning only to get a negative. I was crushed! My husbands says all the tests were just wrong and I was never pregnant. I felt the implantation cramps, sore boobs and the dizziness.  I KNOW i was pregnant. I know my husband is just trying to spare me the heartache of another loss, but it is really upsetting that we won't just let me grieve so i can move on. I hate that he is making me feel like I made this all up!! The bleeding started this morning, and in a way I am glad I POAS yesterday so, its not a surprise to me to wake up bleeding this morning. I am soo thankful for this board for all the support from people who understand that I was pregnant. I am sorry that we all have to be here, (((HUGS))) for everyone who ever has to be a part of this board.
BFP #1 03/2010 EDD 11/18/2010 DD born 11/03/2010 BFP #2 12/02/2011 CP on 12/05/2011 BFP #3 12/28/2011 EDD 09/10/2012 Missed mc @ 9w3d on 02/09/2012 D&C 03/06/2012 BFP #4 04/24/2012 EDD 01/02/2013 CP on 04/29/2012

Re: all the tests were just "wrong".

  • I read your post on TTGP, too, but didn't realize it was also your DH who was saying this. A positive HPT = a pregnancy unless you're taking some fertility meds or maybe if you're on the hcg diet. I'd just let the other people go, but if it were my DH, I'd tell him he needs to explain to me how I got several BFPs using different tests if I was never actually pregnant. I'm so sorry you're dealing with this on top of the loss. You were pregnant.

    BFP1: DD1 born April 2011 at 34w1d via unplanned c/s due to HELLP, DVT 1 week PP
    BFP2: 3/18/12, blighted ovum, natural m/c @ 7w4d
    BFP3: DD2 born Feb 2013 at 38w4d via unplanned RCS due to uterine dehiscence

  • He decided to tell me they were all wrong last night as I was telling him i hope i started bleeding soon so i didn't have to wait forever like I did after my missed mc. I am soo mad at him right now, hopefully i cool off, and he pulled his head out of his a$$ before he gets home from work tonight. I can't deal with him AND my family thinking i am just crazy.
    BFP #1 03/2010 EDD 11/18/2010 DD born 11/03/2010 BFP #2 12/02/2011 CP on 12/05/2011 BFP #3 12/28/2011 EDD 09/10/2012 Missed mc @ 9w3d on 02/09/2012 D&C 03/06/2012 BFP #4 04/24/2012 EDD 01/02/2013 CP on 04/29/2012
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  • imagekelly321:
    I'm so sorry you're dealing with this on top of the loss. You were pregnant.

     

    Thanks for that! :) I really appreciate it.

    BFP #1 03/2010 EDD 11/18/2010 DD born 11/03/2010 BFP #2 12/02/2011 CP on 12/05/2011 BFP #3 12/28/2011 EDD 09/10/2012 Missed mc @ 9w3d on 02/09/2012 D&C 03/06/2012 BFP #4 04/24/2012 EDD 01/02/2013 CP on 04/29/2012
  • Oh wow! I do not know what I would do to my H if he said that to me.  You were pregnant and you are NOT crazy.  Everyone else that thinks you are, are the ones that are crazy.  I am sorry you are going through another loss and people are not being understanding.  I am glad you have this board to help you in a time where I am sure you feel alone.  I hope your H come arounds and realizes he is not making things easier for you.  You can PM me if you need to talk or vent or anything.  I am so sorry you are going through all of this.
    BFP#1 02/19/12 missed mc 03/30/12 1st D&C 05/16/12 2nd D&C 08/17/12 
    BFP #2 06/26/13 EDD 2/26/14 Hoping for my rainbow baby!
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  • I'm so so sorry for your loss.  My story is very very similar to yours (BFP last tuesday, BFN on thursday and friday, the bleeding started friday evening/saturday), but my doctor said it was probably a false positive.   I hope your DH comes around soon. Big hugs.

     big brother 5/30/10  *  cp 4/27/12  *  little sister 2/25/13

  • I think guys think they are helping a lot of the times, when they are clearly not.  The other night, my husband tried to "reassure" me by saying it wasn't a baby yet.  He was really truly trying to make me feel better.  lol  Boys are just stupid sometimes.  I really believe the saying that women are moms as soon as they get a positive pregnancy test, but men aren't dads until they see their child.  I know it's not 100% for all, but I think it's fairly accurate.  They just don't GET it.  They don't understand, and it makes it harder for us and for them.

    I'm terribly sorry you're having to go through this though.  It sucks.  :-(


    Missing our little turkey.
    Estimated Due Date 11/13/12 | Natural Miscarriage 4/17/12

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  • I'm sorry. :( ((hugs))
    imageimage After 2 years of trying with PCOS, 7 rounds of Clomid/Femara, and 2 early miscarriages, we finally found success. :) Due on April 24, 2013! Beta 1 (16 dpo): 477, Beta 2 (19 dpo): 1568, Beta 3 (21 dpo): 3560 Aug 24 - 5w ultrasound - 1 8mm gestational sac Aug 31 - 6w ultrasound - 1 empty 15 mm gestational sac - possible blighted ovum - Beta 41,716 Sept 7 - 7w ultrasound - 2 sacs, heart beats, and fetal poles - TWINS!! Baby A measuring 6w4d, Baby B measuring 6w6d BabyFruit Ticker
  • So so sorry!!  I agree with PPs that men just don't make that bond the same way we do.  For me, I was pregnant and bonded and excited the second that blue line showed up.  Whether it is a chemical pregnancy, or you only knew for a few days before losing the pregnancy, it is a devastating loss.

    I had to have a sit down with DH because he wasn't saying anything right.  He told me he was just trying to make me feel better, but I told him that minimizing the situation "it wasn't a baby yet", "we knew for such a short time" etc. was NOT helpful.

    Maybe tell him how what he is saying makes you feel.  We are all hear to listen though.

    <<hugs>>

    TTC #1 since November 2011
    ** BFP #1 - M/C at 6 weeks 4/13/2012 **
    ** BFP #2 - expecting a little leprechaun!! EDD 3/21/13 | HB 7/30/2012 (6w3d) **
    NT Scan 9/4 - looked great! | Grow, baby, grow!!! | A/S 10/29

    ***All AL always welcome***
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