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June 2011 Moms
ladybug122
member
At my wit's end with sleep issues...
ladybug122
member
I am pretty certain we have the worlds worst sleeping situation for a 10 month old. Clara nurses to sleep for the night and at all naps. She naps on me (3 one hour long naps). She sleeps in our bed and wakes up 4-10 times a night wanting to latch back on so she can doze off again. Nursing to sleep needs to end - I'm just not sure how to do it. I am sooooo done with the battles of her arching her back and biting my nipples while I'm trying to get her to sleep, it used to be peaceful and nice for both of us and now it is just an ugly battle. And more than anything I want time to myself while she sleeps - I have no time to do homework or clean or just relax because she is always in my arms.
So here is what we have tried:
I read the whole Ferber book, and was determined to do the CIO thing (this was at 6 months) but she screamed so hard she threw-up after only 10 minutes. I cried and felt awful and gave up.
Then I read the No-Cry Sleep Solution. I have taken a lot of the advice from there. We have a consistent bedtime routine (dim the lights and quiet, pjs, massage, song, books, nurse) and a consistent bedtime (8:00). I make sure she has plenty of opportunities to eat during the day so she's not hungry at night. We introduced a lovie. I tried the Pantley Pull-Off, but Clara would wake up completely each time I took her off the nipple and be all worked up - so I didn't try that very hard. When she is up 10 times a night its hard not to just put her right back to sleep.
So now I don't know what to do next. All I know is I can't go on like this without loosing my sanity.
Thank you to anyone who read all of this! Any words or wisdom or similar experiences are much appreciated! TIA!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: At my wit's end with sleep issues...
I read both books and went with Ferber. No Cry was good and had some good suggestions that we also do in regards to routines but there were too many different options and I needed a solid plan. DD did really good with sleep training and we are very lucky.
Have you considered trying again? I know it's difficult, DD also only slept in my arms until we did Ferber then started napping in her crib with no nap training.
NCSS did not work for us. I just was too tired, working full time, and couldn't stick with it. A ferber type method was the only thing that worked for us. Others have had success with Good Night, Sleep Tight. I would highly recommend getting one of those books.
If anything, you may just try transitioning to the crib. Being away from the boob may help.
I have seen posters on this board and others have success with The Sleep Lady Shuffle and with Dr. Gordon's night weaning. They are both sort of in-between ferber and no-cry.
I have had some success with NCSS, but it has taken a while. I've been using her tips for almost 2 months. In the beginning, I'd only do the pull-off when she was basically already asleep. I'd put her down in the crib and she'd sort of blink and at least know where she was. Now she still nurses to almost asleep maybe 60-75% of the time, but sometimes she pulls off still awake (on her own!), I put her down, and she falls asleep. I've also been doing 2-3-4 nap schedule and I think that helped a lot.
Honestly, I don't know how much of it is tips from the book and how much is her just maturing sleep-wise. Around 9-10 months was the worst of her sleeping and now it is much better. She only wakes 1-2 a night usually and takes all her naps in her crib. Big hugs, I know how hard it is.
I had the same trouble at around 7 mos. with DS. DH and I both work full time, and the lack of sleep was causing us some major issues. The first change that I made was to nurse him before I put on his pj's, etc. On bath nights, our routine looks like this:
bath, diaper on, nurse, pjs on, brush teeth, read a book, put in crib awake
On non-bath nights, we nurse, diaper change, brush teeth, read a book or two, and again put in his crib awake.
We had no luck with the NCSS because we were too exhausted to stick with the routine and tried the Sleep Lady Shuffle and Ferber, but learned that the interval check ins made him more upset. We decided to go with Weisbluth and do full CIO. It was heartbreaking for two nights, but after that, he'll wimper a little, play, and eventually lie down and go to sleep. He does this for his naps as well. During CIO, I couldn't handle him crying, so I had to leave the house. I went for a run after the bedtime routine because DH was tougher than me. I am so glad I did it, but it was really heartbreaking at the time. Good luck!
I could have written the first part of your post. We also are desperate to stop co-sleeping and stop nursing to sleep. I have tried the Good Night Sleep Tight approach for naps and was having success with it, but we left town for a week and between that and starting to crawl at 9 months, it stopped working. I started reading Ferber and will try it on a weekend DH can take over in the morning and let me sleep. I'm so sleep deprived that bringing her to bed is easier.
I am going to try a night of staying up and doing the timed checks. I tried the Sleep Lady Shuffle for bed and gave up around 1 or 2am because I kept falling asleep for 20 min or so and then kept getting up. It might be easier to not sleep at all instead of the interrupted sleep. At least for me...
If you find something that works please post again. I'd love to get some ideas.
I, too, could have written this post myself. I bring a cooler to bed with 6 bottles. Usually by 7am, we have used 5 bottles and he's nursed at least 3 times.
We had some success for a while using his car sleep association, Scout (the green Leapfrog dog that plays music). Then he started teething and standing and all went out the window.
We are planning to wait until DS is a bit older to do any "training" because it just doesn't feel right to us. DS is constantly teething, sick or learning something new.
I went to a great sleep seminar that helped us a lot. I'll email the leader and see if she's ok with me passing along the handout to you. It really helped me understand a lot of the waking and ways to transition to more peaceful sleep.