Success after IF

? about swimming lessons

I don't know how to swim. And I am terrified of the idea of learning for myself.

A little water goes up my nose and I am a hypreventalating mess...

I do not want this for CC, I want her to lear to swim as early as she can not only so she can enjoy the water, but so she can be safe around it too.

I want to get lessons for her, but would my lack of knowing how to swim take away from her learning ?

How involved is the instructor as opposed to the  person who brings the child for the lesson? If the instructor individually shows how to blow bubbles in the water, that's fine, but if I'm the one who's supposed to show CC how to do it after the instructor demonstrates , well that's going to be a problem...

And I can't just send CC to a lesson with say ,my mom, because she doesn't know how to swim either... and neither does my brother ... or father... or CC's God mother ( see a trend?)

What can I do?

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Re: ? about swimming lessons

  • My lessons with Jack don't start for a couple more weeks, so I can't speak of how they will be.

    But my suggestion would be for you to go take an adult swim class on your own first.

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  • I think it's time to confront your fears! :)

    The water is shallow and goes to about your waist. At this age you are mostly just holding the baby in the water to get her used to it, sitting on the edge of the pool and helping her move her legs and arms, etc. For example, my class used to empty a bucket of balls into the water, and we would walk around the pool with our LOs so they could catch all of the balls. You don't have to put your nose or face under the water necessarily, unless you want to. Good luck, hun!

    Side story: My mom didn't know how to swim growing up, and when she was in high school, they were down at the lake, and one of the guys tossed my mom in to be funny. It scared her to death. So when she had kids, she vowed we would be proficient swimmers so we would never have to deal with that. I am so glad my mom did that for me, and I'm trying to do the same for Lilian so she doesn't have to be scared. 

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  • I'm with you.  I hate the water, I can barely stick my face under the running water in the shower!

    And then I married a college swimmer (now a coach) and bought a house with a pool.  Oh the irony! :)

    As for swim lessons, you (or another adult) will need to take her.  But at her age, it's probaly just about getting wet at this point... I don't think they do the whole stick your face in until they are like 4, so you have a little time.

     

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  • imageOrangeSmoke:

    I'm with you.  I hate the water, I can barely stick my face under the running water in the shower!

    And then I married a college swimmer (now a coach) and bought a house with a pool.  Oh the irony! :)

    As for swim lessons, you (or another adult) will need to take her.  But at her age, it's probaly just about getting wet at this point... I don't think they do the whole stick your face in until they are like 4, so you have a little time.

     

    Not necessarily true. They had Lilian putting her head under water starting at 4 months. They have a natural instinct for what to do. It was quite amazing to watch how natural she was, and now she's a little fish that loves the water. 

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  • We started DD in a tiny pool at our house (I am not sure if you have a yard or not living in NY) this got her use to water that wasnt a bath tub.

    We started swimming lessons 3 years ago -- she was 18 mos -- all the lessons were done with an instructor and about 10 or so parents and children. They are very involved and teach the child everything, we were int he water with them, the water level was my chest maybe. It wasnt deep at all. The instructor shows you everything to do with your child and you practice with them.

     I dont think you necessarily have to practice with them -- but from my experience, children look to you for guidance and to make sure that everything is ok. They are big mimickers.

    Can you maybe practice this on your own in the bath tub to help alleviate some of your fear?

    I think it is great that you dont want her to be afraid of the water, I am sure it is difficult. 

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  • I think it depends on where you go.

    Dillon goes to the YMCA and their "lessons" until age 3 is just getting familiar with the water. At 6 months, you kind of hold them and walk around the pool. You practice "scooping" motion with their hands by throwing a duck and them going to get it (them reaching for it is the scoop) and you holding them on their stomach. You are encouraged to dip them under water, but it is not mandatory. Other games and songs encourage them to not fear the water and have fun in it.

    Dillon is 2.5 now, so he is encouraged to kick now and jump in the water (with me catching him), but he will not actually swim by himself with the help of a bubble until next years class - that is without parents in the pool with them. 

    I can't really swim either, the water is about chest high on me at the deepest point. I just walk around the pool with him. 

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  • imageroselln2:
    imageOrangeSmoke:

    I'm with you.  I hate the water, I can barely stick my face under the running water in the shower!

    And then I married a college swimmer (now a coach) and bought a house with a pool.  Oh the irony! :)

    As for swim lessons, you (or another adult) will need to take her.  But at her age, it's probaly just about getting wet at this point... I don't think they do the whole stick your face in until they are like 4, so you have a little time.

     

    Not necessarily true. They had Lilian putting her head under water starting at 4 months. They have a natural instinct for what to do. It was quite amazing to watch how natural she was, and now she's a little fish that loves the water. 

    I agree -- DD was sticking her head under water also at a young age in lessons. I cannot get her out -- she loves the water. and at 4 is a very good swimmer. She can swim on her own in deep water. Hasn't mastered strokes yet but she can keep her head above water.

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  • We started my son in swimming lessons at 6 months.  It was important to me that he learns to swim and is comfortable in the water.  My mom had all of us taking lessons when we were babies and we are all very comfortable in the water.  My MIL doesn't know how to swim and didn't have any of her children learn and I didn't want this for my son.  My husband had a friend teach him how to swim a little bit in high school and he's now comfortable in the water, but doesn't really know any strokes or anything.

    In our class they have the parents blow bubbles with the kids to help teach them how.  We go in water up to my chest.  They also have the kids going under water as soon as they will tolerate it.  My son started going under at 6 months, but other kids still won't do it at 2 years (although I think many of those recently started lessons and haven't been exposed to water since they were infants).

    I would recommend either taking lessons on your own first or talking to the instructor before the first class and explain to her your fear of the water.  I know the instructors we've had would have been glad to offer a bit more help if they knew you weren't comfortable.  I do think it's important that you learn how to swim a bit, whether it's just learning with your daughter or taking classes on your own.  Once she's able to swim, you'll want to be able to go in the water with her.

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  • Based on reading the responses, I would definitely keep in mind that everyone's experience is different -- not all infant lessons are in shallow water and/or many infant lessons do have the babies put their heads under water.  You can probably check out the lessons in your area before signing up, just to get a sense of what happens in those particular classes.

     

    I will tell you my experience with my 15 month old.  She's been taking lessons for ~6 months now and we're in pool water that is either up to my waist or chest (we move around in different depths).  My daughter dunks her head under the water, blows bubbles in the water, and "swims" (she sort of stretches herself out, puts her face in and kicks her legs and floats from me to her instructor (maybe 2-3 feet).  She also jumps into me from the side of the pool and they fashion a little slide and she lies on her belly and slides into the water to me as well.  I'm very comfortable in water (grew up swimming competitively) and generally am expected to help demonstrate some things after the teacher has shown her (like blowing bubbles) but I rarely have to get completely wet (I could if I want but I haven't dunked my head when she's gone under).

     

    I think it's great to start your daughter at a young age as it will let her be more comfortable with water.  My 15 month old doesn't mind getting dunked or anything b/c she's been doing it for so long....my older daughter didn't start swim lessons until she was 2 and while she loved the water and is a great swimmer now at 4 years old, it took her longer to be comfortable putting her face in, etc.  

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  • We just started Avery's swim lessons last week. They did have the parent demonstrate to the child to blow bubbles in the water. YOU CAN DO IT MEL!!!
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  • Well, I tend to agree with the first poster, this is a great time for you to take swim lessons.  First, it's great that you want your daughter to learn.  Fantastic.  But who will she swim with?  Neither of my parents were proficient swimmers and as a result I never was either, but I did take lessons throughout my childhood, problem was if I wanted to practice I couldn't with either of my parents and as a single child that meant that every summer it was like starting new.  I basically never got better until I took several semesters of adult beginning swimming in college.  Second, everyone's swim class is different.  In ours the kids are encouraged at every lesson to go underwater.  At some point I had to stop going because there were parent demonstrations and I've never mastered the skill of not getting water up my nose.  So DH takes DD now.  Talk to the instructors and get a feel for what this class will be like and decide if you can do it while taking your own class :)
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  • Thank you for all the responses !

    Believe me when I tell you, it is too late for me to learn, I am just too afraid.

    My mom has a pool at her house, it's like 4'11 I believe.

    I get in there but I only walk around in it..and I just worked my way back up to that.

    A few years ago I was lounging on a floaty thing and I fell off while readjusting :/

    Logic would say that if I am 5'3 and fell to the bottom of a 4'11 pool the easiest way to not actually drown would be to stand up.

    Yeah, my brain did not process that and I was actually drowning at the bottom of the pool until my brother pulled me up.

    I wish I could say why the water makes me so scared .. 

    Similar to Orange Smoke, I have to hold my breath to wash my face in the shower!

    I think it has to do with my being asthmatic and knowing how horrible it is to be extremely short of breath and not having a quick remedy for it..

    I DO NOT want any of this for CC, I want her to be unafraid and confident in the water. If she can be a champion Olympic swimmer so be it ! Even if I can't really get in the water with her.

    I guess I should do some research and see who offers lessons near me and what exactly they entail and hope my fear does not hinder CC not even one tiny bit...

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  • It truly is never too late but, if you are not at a place where you can consider taking lessons then I really wonder what you think CC will get out of the lessons.  Your fear, no matter how well you try to control it, will prevent you from taking her swimming.  I don't even understand how your Mom has a pool when no adult can actually swim.  That is pretty spectacularly dangerous IMO.  I know this is harsh, but growing up without parents who could swim was always an issue for me.  Then again, we lived in a state with no water so it wasn't as much as an issue as it would have been if say, my grandmother had a pool.
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  • imageGypsyEsq:
    It truly is never too late but, if you are not at a place where you can consider taking lessons then I really wonder what you think CC will get out of the lessons.  Your fear, no matter how well you try to control it, will prevent you from taking her swimming.  I don't even understand how your Mom has a pool when no adult can actually swim.  That is pretty spectacularly dangerous IMO.  I know this is harsh, but growing up without parents who could swim was always an issue for me.  Then again, we lived in a state with no water so it wasn't as much as an issue as it would have been if say, my grandmother had a pool.

    What I'd like for CC to get out of the lessons is confidence. So that if she joins girl scouts or goes to sleep away camp ( two things I never got to do but hope she would like to do), or even on vacation ( like college Spring Break) when she's a lot older she can have fun and join in the water activities and not hang back like I had to do because I was too afraid.

     

    The pool at my Mom's came with the house when she bought it with my Step dad.

    He was in the Army and Navy, so he can swim. But he's not the cuddly cute kind of Grandpa so I don't see him being able to take CC for lessons though to be fair I haven't approached him with the question.

     

    ETA: I didn't take anything in your reply as harsh, you make a valid point which further feeds my desire for CC to be able to swim on her own

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  • I agree with others that you should consider taking lessons yourself before getting CC in the water.  Think about it this way.. you are going to the trouble of bringing her to swimming lessons so she can enjoy the water, right?  In no time, she's going to want you to take her swimming someplace (a pool, a friend's house, etc..).  What happens if she's in the water and starts having trouble?  You should have the confidence to be able to help her in the water yourself.  Accidents happen by the water all the time with kids.. you can get to a point where you can at least jump in if you need to.  I'd call around and ask for programs that help adults.. you can do it!
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  • If you have a true phobia, then you may not be able to take an adult swim class right away.  You could look into cognitive behavioral therapy for phobias/anxiety - https://srcbt.org/do-you-need-help/phobias  I think you really need to be comfortable with being in the water/swimming for your daughter because you are usually going to be the adult who is most closely watching her and closest to her.  Even if there is a lifeguard, you have to be collected enough to direct the lifeguard to your daughter if she goes under or is struggling - if you panic or freeze, you can't help her.  A phobia is not your fault, but it can usually be treated/overcome.  Good luck!
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  • imageMelicakes:

    My mom has a pool at her house, it's like 4'11 I believe.

    Perhaps hire someone to come to your moms pool and do private lessons there. This way they can hold your DD if you are not comfortable. And maybe over time with your DD you will overcome some of your fears.  Usually you can find a college student who is lifeguard cert. and swims to come to you and be reasonably priced.

    GL!

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