I have a flameworthy vent/threat

BeeBee08 · April 2012

The next person who comes on here and says that 5dt's are so much better than 3dt's and have a better chance for success should get a virtual throat punch.

First of all, it's very discouraging for people who have 3dt's to read garbage like that. And it makes people feel disappointed to hear their RE tell them they're doing a 3dt when they should feel elated that they have beautiful embies to transfer at any stage!!!

Second, there are SO many factors that go into making the decision between a 3dt and 5dt that you can't come on here and throw a blanket over everyone saying that a 5dt is BETTER. Neither is better for everyone. We pay professionals thousands of dollars to make that decision for us and whatever decision is made is the BETTER decision given the circumstances. Yes, there are people who have had success with 5dt when they didn't have success with 3dt's, but that is not the final factor.

And yes, I used capitals because I'm all jacked up on progesterone and for those of you who know me, which most of you should given the nature of this board, you know I'm not best friends with progesterone.

Rant over.

Mrs.McIrish · April 2012

Yeah, as a "2dt" or "no transfer" girl, those types of posts make my blood boil. Be thankful you have a decent embryo to transfer at all.. No flames from me!

joules12 · April 2012

::lurk in::

THANK YOU so much for this, BeeBee -- I agree wholeheartedly! I'm certainly still fairly new to this world, but I was having the same thoughts about a recent post I read (was either here or on IF).

::lurk out::

amy1004 · April 2012

No flames from me. I haven't been through IVF nor am I on progesterone and that makes me angry. Every protocol is different not better or worse.

Why can't people just be thankful that they are able to do a treatment and have embies?

theworms · April 2012

((HUGS)) cutie.

I have my own opinions on 3dt vs. 5dt which I will keep to myself. I've been on the boards for over 4 years and I've seen success with 2dt, 3dt and 5dt, it's about the 1 or 2 fighter embies that snuggle in for long haul.

The one thing I will say is to stay away from clinics that only do 3dt, if they don't have lab capacity to grow out to 5dt, I wouldn't want my embies growing their labs.

Faith722 · April 2012

Not flameworthy at all! We all have different experiences and ideas about what's best. It's def not a one size fits all. My experience has been: 5dt=BFN, 3dt = m/c, then BFP. I'm biased toward 3dt.

Ginger71 · April 2012

I haven't been on TB in ages but I saw this post and had to comment, Bee! You are absolutely correct. As a matter of faqct, when I had my 2nd m/c, I had a 5dt and my friend had a 3dt. She was so discouraged but guess what? She has 3 year old twins from that 3dt.

I miss my vets.

xoxo

theworms · April 2012

Ginger71:
I haven't been on TB in ages but I saw this post and had to comment, Bee! You are absolutely correct. As a matter of faqct, when I had my 2nd m/c, I had a 5dt and my friend had a 3dt. She was so discouraged but guess what? She has 3 year old twins from that 3dt.

I miss my vets.

xoxo

We miss you too cutie!

How are you?

abvernon · April 2012

No flames from me. Every protocol is different. Like worms, I would want to have my options avaialble when then time comes ( 2dt, 3dt and 5dt). If my RE only limited me to one type of transfer, it would raise an eyebrow from me.

rockpaperlove · April 2012

We have all seen plenty of great stories of success with 3dt's...and 2dt's...and 4dt's...and 5dt's...any of the given transfer days is the point I am trying to make. I don't think your post is flameworthy. Making it a transfer, no matter the day, is a huge victory that should be celebrated and appreciated.

Edwina.McDunnough · April 2012

I have done mostly 3dts and there is a time and place for those, as well as for going to blast, but I seriously don't like clinics that will not let you do a 5dt because of your age or because it doesn't fit their scheduling, even when they are fully capable. The day of transfer is something that you should be comfortable with and not forced upon you, and obviously every person has their own circumstance with different priorities.

As for what is better, of course it's better to have a large number of high quality embryos than not, but we don't really get a choice in the matter, do we. It's better to get a BFP on a crap cycle than a BFN on a promising one, I'll tell you that.

naybird · April 2012

No flames here! I had success with a 3 day transfer. My 5 day transfer of "perfect blasts" failed.

Rant away, darlin!!! I know what a witch progesterone can be!!!

Aegis2005 · April 2012

No flames here.

I also get annoyed by people who want to know stats of retrieved/fertilized/frozen etc - to "compare to my stats". Every person is differernt - and different clinics have different standards on freezing.

Gregermis · April 2012

. I agree 100%!!!

steveandkim2 · April 2012

I hope you don't mind me posting, but I couldn't agree more. I've had BFNs from 3dts and 5dts. I created large volumes of embryos and always had a number to freeze and it took me multiple IVF/FETs to get pregnant.

I also feel the same way about when people talk about their embryo scores. I transferred "perfect" scored embryos and ended up heartbroken. When my RE told me that my embryos from my last FET were "so-so" I cried for days because based on everything I read on here I didn't have a snowballs chance in hell (the nurse called them the JV squad). I thought for sure it wouldn't work. Well guess what - my lowest grade embryo is my beautiful son and I don't think there could be anything more perfect.

I agree with Worms. I think it comes down to the right embryo being transferred to your body at the right time. I hated hearing those words in the 2 years I was cycling, but looking back now, they make sense.

njohnson1972 · April 2012

As someone with DOR and very few embies each time, the one time I made it to a 5dt, I was thrilled. For me, it was the 1st time that I actually had more than 3 embies still going strong at day 3. It was a big hurdle for my embies. It was the 1st time that we got to wait and see which would be the best versus just putting them all back. That just never happens to me. I only made 2 eggs at my last cycle, so we did a 3dt. For me, doing a 5dt means that my body made more eggs, which is a friggin' miracle.

So yes, it was a goal I strived for. I only made it once out 4 IVF cycles

ForTheLoveOf Pink · April 2012

Yes it has been a hot topic of late! For me, I agree with BeeBee it is hard to hear when some ladies get their soap boxes out. Yes, 2dt, 3dt,5dt....they all have their sucesses and failures! I try to have faith in my RE and hope that he and his team will do what is best for me and my potential success. As with anything "scientific" there are studies that can back up anything....search the net and you will find something backing your claim.

Sloane99 · April 2012

*applause*. I couldn't agree more. We are not doctors, what worked for some cycles and not for others has much more go into it than day of an embie transfer, and odds are even with details from the OP we have no idea what all went into that decision.

I agree with Worms and Edwina that I have more trust in labs themselves that a) have the capabilities to handle any transfer and b) make the decision medically, not based on their cycle scheduling or vacation plans.

mm29 · April 2012

Edwina.McDunnough:
The day of transfer is something that you should be comfortable with and not forced upon you, and obviously every person has their own circumstance with different priorities.
As for what is better, of course it's better to have a large number of high quality embryos than not, but we don't really get a choice in the matter, do we. It's better to get a BFP on a crap cycle than a BFN on a promising one, I'll tell you that.

I agree with this 100%

eponine7682 · April 2012

Aegis2005:
No flames here.

I also get annoyed by people who want to know stats of retrieved/fertilized/frozen etc - to "compare to my stats". Every person is differernt - and different clinics have different standards on freezing.

This!! I hate that too! No flames here either! That is like saying that if you didn't do it my way you won't get pregnant. GRR!

jlcrane78 · April 2012

My office only does 5dt. I have no choice. I've heard several people mention it's better for the embies to grow inside you vs. in the lab. I'm definitely not opposed to 3dt if that holds true. Every situation is different, and obviously my doctor's 5dt policy hasnt helped me much.

DeputiesWife · April 2012

Ginger71:
I haven't been on TB in ages but I saw this post and had to comment, Bee! You are absolutely correct. As a matter of faqct, when I had my 2nd m/c, I had a 5dt and my friend had a 3dt. She was so discouraged but guess what? She has 3 year old twins from that 3dt.

I miss my vets.

xoxo

hi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mitzi Bishi · April 2012

Send those that think 5dt's are better my way. With "no known issues" I have had 4 transfered at day 5 and only c/p's.

It sucks all around when people imply something is better or not the "norm", because like you said the professionals use the information they have for the best possible outcome.

We're all doing the best with what we have and IVF isn't fail proof or the step to jump to due to impatience.

I also tire of the "it's 5dpt and I should see something". It all just stresses others out who are searching for answers themselves.

Every single step should be celebrated, but not paraded.

All the comparing and high falutin is out of control.

vanessagorc · April 2012

I agree w Edwina and worms and this one...

I'll add that I have beef w people spouting off info based soley on what their clinic does. What works for some, won't work for another. And to act like YOUR clinic has it all figured out, is just F-ing laughable.

I have done both 3 day and 5 day. For ME, a five day works better bc my embies all look good at day 3, and tank on days 4 and 5. So we need to weed out those good looking ones, that are just going to crap out. BUT I'm talking about ME! I don't assume this applies to everyone.

My clinic does well over 3000 IVF's a yr, and does both 3 and 5dt's. I feel like the option should be there for both. I'm very fortunate to have access to some of the best healthcare in the world. Again, I know not everyone is in the same boat.

STL34 · April 2012

I was always told a 5dt was better than a 3dt. But, after two failed IVFs with 5dts and a successful third IVF with a 2dt, I don't know if I would ever do a 5dt again!! 2dts rock!!

Seriously, it is a personal decision. If you don't have a lot of embies to choose from, doing a 2dt or a 5dt doesn't really seem to make a difference (at least that is my experience).

Roxie5739 · April 2012

bellalou32:
AMEN TO THAT!! Thank you for posting this! I get so P.O'd when I see posts about 5dt being better than 3dt! It's annoying, discouraging, not a proven fact, and just plain ignorant.

Ditto. People try to put IVF and other treatments in a box and compare too much. Like what worked for you, what did your RE do etc etc etc. I am an avocate for supplements as I think it helped me, but may not work for the next gal. Everything about IVF is a mystery machine and our RE's try proven methods or advice to try to make it work, There is just no guarantees which ever way we go

BAKERMOMHDS · April 2012

Mitzi Bishi:

Send those that think 5dt's are better my way. With "no known issues" I have had 4 transfered at day 5 and only c/p's.

It sucks all around when people imply something is better or not the "norm", because like you said the professionals use the information they have for the best possible outcome.

We're all doing the best with what we have and IVF isn't fail proof or the step to jump to due to impatience.

I also tire of the "it's 5dpt and I should see something". It all just stresses others out who are searching for answers themselves.

Every single step should be celebrated, but not paraded.

All the comparing and high falutin is out of control.

This.. I couldn't agree more. I never knew TB existed years ago when my husband and I started this journey. Then, I found TB..started posting..and quickly realized, I can't do this. I mostly lurk every now and then now for this very reason...

I am unique, my body is unique, what works for me most likely will not work for someone else. My journey will be unique.

AmCheri · April 2012

Could not agree more. 5dt posts always make me feel like a loser because I know my chances of ever seeing a 5dt are nonexistent.

Bethany1026 · April 2012

no flames here...I was all in a tizzy my virgin round because I wasn't doing a 5dt....I wish you had posted this last year )

progesterone = Devil

PennyLane26 · April 2012

::peeks in::

Thank you for this post. I post on IF and had my first 3dt done on Saturday. I was discouraged by responses from other poster regarding 3dts. As if it isn't stressful enough to transfer, no one wants to hear that theirs was all for nothing. Go girl!

::heads back to IF::

JillAly · April 2012

I hope it's ok to respond - your post had SAIF welcome - I feel like I have to respond to this. Both my kids came from 3dt's. My 5dt's never worked. My RE said something I will never forget. She said "there are people who believe 5dt is better but there is no place better for an embryo to snuggle in and grow than inside you. I mean really? Do you want a cold petrie dish or a warm uterus?" I'm a believer!

newsbaby · April 2012

I'm sorry I rarely post on this board but I felt compelled to chime in because that is something that has always bothered me!!!!! My twins are a result of a 3dt. I remember my RE called me at work and I had to leave for my 3dt. I was so pissed and worried bc it was drilled in my head that a 5dt was better and its obviously not always true.

Want a personalized experience?

I have a flameworthy vent/threat

Re: I have a flameworthy vent/threat

Choose Another Board

Search Boards