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Napping all day

Katie31759Katie31759 member
in Attachment Parenting

I haven't posted on here before but I need some advice. My LO is 3 months old and he was taking 3 naps a day and then sleeping a 5-6 hour stretch at night till about a month ago. Then he started waking up every 2 1/2 hours at night or so and taking a long nap in the morning, one time 6 hours! So we decided to wake him up after 3 and see how that worked. He seemed less cranky for a bit. Well the past couple days he's been sleeping that 4-5 hour stretch at night but was impossssible to get down for his 2nd nap, so we decided to let him just sleep yesterday and he slept 5 1/2 hours. He seemed better for a while, but only took a short evening nap and was screaming when we were trying to put him down because he seemed over tired. Do you think we should let him sleep when he wants or wake him up after a few hours? I have no idea what's best for him! Thanks so much! 

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Re: Napping all day

  • maiastarmaiastar
    Hello! I know...the sleep thing/nap thing is so confusing.  I had talked to my pedi about this and the way she explained it to me was to never let my LO nap longer than there longest stretch at night.  That way they get into the habit that naps are shorter in the day and sleep is longer at night.  My LO usually naps two or three times a day (4 months old). Once around 9 for an hour, again around 11:30/12 for 20-40 minutes, and her longest nap is always around 2.  She will nap usually until 3:30 or 4...sometimes 4:30. I don't let her nap past 5. I just gently wake her by rubbing her hair or belly.  She sometimes will wake fussy but I nurse her and then we walk her around and entertain her with books and toys.  She's always still ready to go down to bed at her bedtime 6:30. Her longest stretch of sleep at night is between 3 and 4 hours.  I would say try different things and see what works best for you and your baby.  Follow his sleepy cues...my DD rubs her eyes, yawns, gets disinterested in toys usually about an hour and a half after waking.  If I wait any longer it gets harder to get her to sleep.  Your LO maybe trying to push his bedtime back.  What time does he go to bed? When we started DD bedtime routine at 2 months we tried 7 but on her own she told us she wanted bedtime by 6:30. Having the bedtime routine has worked great in getting her to fall asleep.  We start the same time every night, wipe down with warm burp cloth, lotion/pjs, goodnight book, nurses or a bottle, and down to sleep with white noise. 
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  • Katie31759Katie31759 member
    I usually start getting him ready for bed around 6:30 and he's in bed nursing around 7 and asleep by 7:30. Maybe I should start earlier? He just seems tired all day the past couple days. And hea so fussy when I try and feed him. The second I put him on the boppy he starts crying and won't nurse. I have to give him his pacifier a few times before he'll even try and latch. He only gets one or two bottles while I'm at work but doesn't do that with the bottles. And he doesn't do it when he wakes up at night either.
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  • pixieprincsspixieprincss member

    We were/are of the philosophy to let baby "drive" and wake or sleep as desired (we would gage based on his sleepy cues), with some extra encouragement to go to sleep when we are asleep (nursing in the dark, shushing, if nothing else--giving him a quiet toy to play with in the cosleeper while we slept, etc.) DS took about 5 naps a day only settled into night-time sleep mode until 10-11 until he was a year. (hence how he could fit in 5 naps) After that, he moved himself to a routine of two naps before 5PM and nighttime sleep around 7:30. But, our family and work dynamic allows us extreme flexibility and we have no problem with him not STTN. He woke every 2 hours at night from 7-12 months to nurse. I would latch him and then sleep through the rest, so it didn't really phase me. That doesn't work for some families.

    Our way was very free-form, but DS couldn't be a happier guy. I think that is another way to look at it--if your child is miserable (day or night), then address it. But, if your child is thriving even if your way may be outside of cultural norms or a certain method (be it AP or far from it), then heed that. I am a firm believer that--barring some sort of health condition--babies' natures are smarter than parent's methods and they are driven to eat, sleep, wake, etc. based on their unique needs that day, week, season, etc. Now, the reality is that sometimes life doesn't allow us the flexibility to heed that. But, if you can, great!

    So, my best advice is a) follow your intuition b) address things only if they are actually causing problems c) don't be afraid to change your methods. You'll find something that works then baby will change. Or, something will fail but then baby will change and that thing may now actually work.

    It sounds like you are already on that track, just hitting a road bump with the over-tiredness.  Also, your baby is still very young. My way may not be a fit for many families with, say, a 10-month old, but your baby is still super young. Before you know it, the 4-month wakeful may be here!

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    More Green For Less Green

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  • Katie31759Katie31759 member
    Thank you so much for the advice! We were definitely leaning more towards letting him sleep when he needs to. Its a little hard on me when he'a up all night because I work, but luckily only for 5 hours or so and my husband watches him during the day so we do have a lot of flexibility. Do they usually really calm down around 4 months?
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  • pixieprincsspixieprincss member

    Things tend to go haywire at 4 months. Then after that, they settle a bit, but aby sleep is anything but a linear path, IMO. Here are some helpful things to read...

     https://kellymom.com/parenting/nighttime/4mo-sleep/

    https://kellymom.com/parenting/nighttime/sleep/

    https://kellymom.com/parenting/nighttime/sleepstudies/

    I work full-time, so I hear you on the up-at-night being hard! Though I don't find it problematic or concerning, I do recognize that it makes it that much harder.  Luckily, my job is rather flexible, so whileI can't really get a nap in, I only have to get up early 2 days a week. DS tends to wake up at about 6-6:30 so DH gets up with him and I get some solid sleep until 7:30 or 8.

    imageimageimage

    image
    More Green For Less Green

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  • Katie31759Katie31759 member
    Thank you for the links! That's a lot of good information. I do work so maybe that's part of it, that he wants to nurse more when I'm home. Everything is such a learning experience when you're a FTM!! =)
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  • RandiWalshRandiWalsh
    We have also used the "let baby drive" way. There is so much pressure in some methods. But sometimes work/life schedules have to be considered for some parents. Being such a young LO u may have to wake to feed but I think if we are stressed out about searching and trying things baby is probably feeling that too. My son fell into his own routine and has adjusted that every couple months. He's 8 months now. And he wakes up at 7am, naps from 10-12, another nap from 3-4. And is in bed for the night at 8. At 3 months he was taking 3 or 4 shorter naps through the day, in bed at 8 and waking to eat around 3am then went back to bed till 7. My daughter had the 4 month wakeful period but my son didn't. So it may not apply to you either. Whatever you choose in the end will be the best thing for you and him.
    Mommy of two
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  • Katie31759Katie31759 member
    Yea, we've pretty much decided to let him do what he feels is best. He's just been SO cranky lately, but it's probably the 3 month growth spurt. He's not usually like that. He was up all night last night after sleeping for a 5 hour nap yesterday. It took 40 minutes to get him to sleep, and I had to rock him back to sleep the first time he woke up. Poor little guy!
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