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Natural Birth
Should I?
I don't know wether I should go natural with my Labor or not? I have half of the mothers telling me it's not that bad and the other half telling me not to be stupid and just go with the epidural. Does anyone have some REAL advice they could give me on deciding what to do? As of now, if there are no complication, I want to go natural... Is this just something I'll have to decide in the delivery room???
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Re: Should I?
My advice: prepare for birth, decide when you get there. You do not need to make a hard and fast decision either way, because you don't know how your birth will go and how you will deal with it physically, emotionally, and mentally.
What you can do is concentrate on preparation (which is a good thing to do anyway, because epidurals don't always work 100% anyway).
Of course, you can decide right now if you want, but if this is a hard decision to make for you - then, don't worry about it.
It's a very personal decision. But, it was one of the most liberating and empowering experiences of my life...and I want to do it again. Very few women I've known that have done natural child birth regret the decision. My advice, research natural child birth and be prepared for it. Learn breathing techniques. Get some books, read the birth stories here, watch videos of actual natural births, either at home or a birth center or hospital. Ask for experiences. Take classes.
If you get to the hospital and it's too much for you, know it was still the right decision for you. It's easier to go into the hospital planning a NB and change than it is to not have planned one and decide you want it at the last minute.
This.
DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)
If you wait to decide in the delivery room, odds are you will go with an epidural. You really need/should be somewhat prepared for coping with the pain and staying relaxed and your head needs to be "in the game" because drugs can sound pretty tempting when you feel like you might die of pain/exhaustion.
I've had 2 med free and 1 epidural and I would be lying if I said the epidural wasn't nice. It was only in place for 30 minutes before pushing so I didn't have it long and about 20 of those minutes I had a "hot spot" where the drugs had no effect at all. Still excruciating and painful and extra hard to get through since I was in bed then, even though it was only the size of a silver dollar. That sucked.
But after the fact, I can say that what I felt afterward was much different with the epidural. Sure, there is still a feeling of accomplishment - you just gave birth!!!! But feeling everything, using your own adrenalin to get through that last bit and then the complete rush after baby comes out and the pain just disappears is absolutely awesome and something I didn't feel with the epidural. It was 3 contractions of pushing and then there was a baby. Super exciting but not the same kind of rush.
I'm hoping for another med-free birth this time (#3 was the epidural) but know my bodies limits now and will not be as opposed to an epi if that will help things along again (induced with #3 and couldn't relax through the horrible pit. contractions so I stopped progressing. Once I had the epi in I went from 5-6cm to 10cm in 30 minutes.)
Do your research for sure, but if you do think you want to go med-free, I would highly recommend looking into some kind of relaxation method (bradley worked great for me).
You don't need to make a decision right now. Learn about natural coping techniques now. Give them all a shot when you're in labour. Learn about your options for pain meds and the side effects for each. Make sure your support team (spouse, friends, labour support people?) know ways to help you through. When you get there, decide what you want. All that matters is that you know your stuff and make an informed decision that is right for you.
I went natural, but I know women who were adamant they were going to go natural and then got the pain meds and felt like failures later because they "caved." I almost caved myself, the first time around- it was only because of a supportive nurse that I didn't. But we shouldn't feel like failures for opting for the pain meds, and if you aren't 100% sold on the idea of a natural birth right now, then don't stress about it.
I'm not going to lie- labour can be crazy painful. Some women seem to luck out and have easier labours but I'm not one of them. That being said, it is doable- you can handle it. You have to decide if you want to handle it- if it's worth it to you. That might not be something you can know until you're actually in labour.
I haven't gone through it yet either (although I assisted a good friend in her natural labor)--looking forward to it in just a few weeks--but I just want to add my 2 cents to what everyone else is saying: don't listen to your friends who ridicule your decision!
I would guess the friends who are telling you it's stupid not to get an epi are either a) women who weren't prepared for natural labor and therefore needed the epi or b) women who never even considered natural labor
I've been preparing, not only techniques but preparing my mind that "Yes, I'm going to do this; I can do this." You need to go in with an expectation that you can do it. Naturally, I'm aware I might "cave" and get the drugs, but I know that's not what I want and I know it's possible to have a great experience without them. With that knowledge, I feel more prepared for labor.
If natural is the way you want to go, go for it! As for your friends, either don't share the choice with them or tune them out. It's not their body or their baby; it's yours. Do with it what you will.
I agree. I spent A LOT of time reading and preparing, but I also knew I wouldn't be one of the people who was disappointed in myself if I "caved," having no idea what to expect as a FTM. In the end, when I asked for "something" it turned out I was 10cm and was pushing withing 5 mins. I tried to prepare to hold out until it was too late for the epi anyhow.