annoyed at everyone's opinion
k80jane
member
We've only told immediate family so far, but it seems like everyone is shocked, and not happy. DD and this LO will be 18 months apart. DH and I are shocked, but THRILLED!!
We planned this, but didn't expect it to happen so soon. We started trying this month, (not very hard) because it took us over one year to conceive DD. DID NOT think it would happen this fast for us. Another reason we wanted to start trying now is that we are moving 8 hours away from all of our family (both sides) Summer of '13. So we wanted to have our next baby while we were still here.
i just feel like I owe everyone an explanation. With DD, everyone was expecting her for about a year, so when we announced her, everyone was happy, no questions asked. I'm pregnant, there's nothing I can do about that. DH and I are happy and I know that's all that matters. Just a little disappointed with our family's reactions.
Re: annoyed at everyone's opinion
Oh, no! {{hugs!}}
I have the fear of the same thing being said to me when I spill in a few weeks. This was unplanned for us, but we couldn't be happier. I know that some people will not be thrilled about this, but am going to try not to care what they think!
My girls are not quite 19 months apart. We didn't get any truly negative reactions, but a lot of people just seemed indifferent about the second baby (until she was born) and my mom still says "We didn't expect it so soon!" Which is especially hilarious because her first two are 11 months apart.
Don't feel like you own anyone an explanation. You and your DH made this decision for YOUR family, and you are happy with it. That's all that matters. When people get rude, just smile and change the subject. Once that baby is here no one will care how soon he/she came after their older sibling, they'll just be happy to have another LO to love.
DD1 Feb 2010
DD2 Sept 2011
I remember posting on this board when I was freaking out about being pregnant. I realize that "freaking out" isn't the most mature way to phrase what I was going through but man....it was hard. A lady on here post: "There is a reason why pregnancy is 9 months. It will all be okay."
I had finally gotten to the point when I was excited and hoping it was all going to work out. We decided to announce at the very end of DD's birthday party. We got dead silence. No one moved. Only our two close friends that knew smiled. All of us sat in horror as my and DH's family just stared at us. I wanted to cry.
Now, approximately 7 months later....everyone is SO excited. It took them some time. It took me some time. Just remember, there is a reason why pregnancy is 9 months.
I'm sorry! My boys are 15 months apart and we just shocked our family. They were even more shocked this 3rd time. I got more negative from strangers then anything. I get the your crazy when people see me with 2 little ones and pg again. I have learned to brush it off and keep going. I love having my boys close together and I woudln't change it for anything now.
I'm actually dreading telling everyone that I am pregnant again. First, our baby is only 8 months old, second, we already have three children, third, I'm 40 years old, and fourth, I have had two miscarriages and so not only do people judge just based on that but then if something happens with this pregnancy there will be a lot of "well, what would you expect" sort of responses.
So yea, I understand. The good thing is that normally once the baby is actually here everyone is very excited. It's hard to resist a baby.
Kelly, Mom to Christopher Shannon 9.27.06, Catherine Quinn 2.24.09, Trey Barton lost on 12.28.09, Therese Barton lost on 6.10.10, Joseph Sullivan 7.23.11, and our latest, Victoria Maren 11.15.12
Secondary infertility success with IVF, then two losses, one at 14 weeks and one at 10 weeks, then success with IUI and then just pure, crazy luck. Expecting our fifth in May as the result of a FET.
This Cluttered Life
OH MY GOSH I TOTALLY AGREE!!
Ive noticed it too, and brought it up to my DH. We are *THRILLED* when we announce it, with huge smiles on our faces, and we get alot of awkward pauses, and 'already?'s and 'wow you guys don't waste time'. (with the exception of both our parents, they are super excited) I was going to write a post about this earlier actually, on how little we have been congratulated on this PG. It makes me pretty sad actually.
I have a feeling we will get the same reaction when we announce on FB. Im pretty sure I'm going to make a caption to all who were wondering- YES, THIS WAS INTENTIONAL.
You know, just to make it clear
Big sister meeting little brother for the first time-
<a href="http://s326.photobucket.com/albums/k409/YellowMiles/?action=view
Unfortunately it's totally normal - especially when they are so close together.
The first pregnancy is like an event - like a wedding.
This was the reaction we got when telling my family (DD surprised them with an "I'm the big sister" shirt). Also, please note Abby going for my dad's cup while everyone was distracted.
The looks on their faces are priceless!
People have been generally very excited for us and I'm thankful for that, but my happiness regarding our second baby isn't contingent on anyone else's feelings anyway. Of course, we want our family and friends to be happy and supportive but NO ONE will ever love your children the way you do and that's especially true before they arrive.
There is a terrible culture of negativity surrounding parenthood and I choose not to subscribe to it. I love my babies and some days are tiring, but that's because I give them my everything and love them endlessly.
Congratulations!
I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living my baby you'll be.
- Robert Munsch
This. EXACTLY. Katemennenga, our first LOs are days apart and are second LOs will be too!
You are not alone. (Clearly, with all these other family responses...wtf?)
My parents are so thrilled, all the ladies in my mommy group are so happy for us, but my husband's family is, as they put it, "worried." I did take offense to this, as much as I tried not to. It has definitely changed things, I haven't spoken with his side of the family since we let them in on our happy news.... not because I'm mad at them, but just because now it's very awkward......
Told my MIL since she is with us until June. The first words out her mouth were " Ahhh, too soon. aren't you using birth control?" LOL
She then proceeded to tell me how she was going going advise DH on BC and finished with, "Don't have an abortion oh.."
Despite my nausea and crappiness that day, it was hilarious LOL.
Not planning on telling my own family anytime soon though I know my mom would be thrilled as she has been pestering me on stopping BF'ing to get ready for #2.