Body Image and Being Self-Conscious...

[Deleted User] · April 2012

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beccajanedowning · April 2012

I feel the same way. I also gained over 40 pounds leading up to getting pregnant, then added 20 with the pregnancy. I feel like I look like a cow and DD constantly eating doesn't help the image.

DH keeps saying things like "It'll come off" and "you just had a baby" as well but he just doesn't understand that I feel ugly. It also didn't help that we spent Easter with his family - including his cousin who had a baby one month before DD and is now below her pre-pregnancy weight. And tall.

Like PP said, investing a small amount in clothes that fit right now did help. I have jeans I can wear that don't fall off like my maternity ones and actually fit over my thighs unlike my pre-pregnancy ones. I started WW (although I threw that out the window the past week learning to eat dairy and soy free for DD) and have been trying to get in at least a short workout in the mornings. Realistically I know that these things will help. But right now I do feel gross - especially after seeing our pictures from Easter.

*hug*

michnthecity · April 2012

I am right there with you. I gained 50lbs and only feel like I have lost the obvious ones that go away after having the baby, I still have 30 to lose. I have been exercising like crazy, breastfeeding, counting cals...it's not "flying" off. I went clothes shopping yesterday at Ny and Co to get some things for when I return to work next week. I stood at the cash register and sobbed. I'm not exaggerating here. I had to explain to the women at the checkout that I just had a baby and I'm really upset and how large I've gotten. I had to order a size of pants they didn't have in the style I wanted. They were really nice about it. Although it's nice to wear pants that button, they are still tight and not as comfy as the elastic waist band pants I've been wearing all during/after the pregnancy. This sucks, there's just no two ways about it. The only thing to do is to do something about it, eat better and keep moving.

megaloo27 · April 2012

I also gained 40 pounds while ttc. I was so stressed about it. I feel yor pain, I tried on a dress today and I looked so lumpy and gross. I am having a bad week too, so I don't have much encouragement. On a lighter note, you can't be a heifer because that is a cow that hasn't had a baby

SmittyPants · April 2012

You're not alone. I can't stand looking at myself in the mirror. My body changed more than I thought possible (my rib cage is bigger and not going back to normal... WTF?) and none of my cute clothes fit.

However, I agree with previous posters. Take a little bit of cash and purchase some clothes that fit. I went to Target and got a pair of jeans and a few tops. It really helped me to stop feeling so dumpy.

Huahine · April 2012

Love that link LibraryChica.

My husband got so upset with my referring to myself as a cow that I eventually stopped. Not uddering those hateful words has actually helped my self image.

New clothing, waxing, pedicures and haircuts have been a huge help too. And every day I shower and do my hair and makeup, even if I don't plan to leave the house. It helps me feel better if the image in the mirror looks more like the old professional me.

SoonToBeMsP · April 2012

Huahine:
Love that link LibraryChica.
My husband got so upset with my referring to myself as a cow that I eventually stopped. Not uddering those hateful words has actually helped my self image.
New clothing, waxing, pedicures and haircuts have been a huge help too. And every day I shower and do my hair and makeup, even if I don't plan to leave the house. It helps me feel better if the image in the mirror looks more like the old professional me.

Pun intended?

footnotegirl · April 2012

First off, there is not a direct link between health and weight. You really can be healthy at almost any size. Being fat doesn't automatically make you unhealthy, being thin does not automatically make you healthy.

Secondly, your body just did AN AMAZING THING. You grew a whole other person inside of you and then delivered her. That's not going to happen without some perfectly normal changes to your body. Some of these changes may be permanent (a widening of the hips for example). Some of them will be temporary (loose skin, lower abdomen pudge). But none of them make you ugly or unhealthy.

Thirdly, try to remember that it is more important for your daughter to see someone who loves and respects herself than who is the 'right' weight. Feeling bad about yourself because you put on extra pounds due to a totally normal process is not healthy for your daughter to see.

I lost 70 lbs last year before getting pregnant. I had been obese my whole life up to that point and I seriously could not lose the weight and make the choices I needed to until I learned to love myself exactly the way I was. That involved buying and wearing clothes I felt comfortable and pretty in at the size I already was and giving up thinking about 'my size' and what it should be rather than what it really was. Once I did that, I was more able to focus on actual healthy choices rather than focussing on just losing weight. And for the first time, I actually lost weight. More importantly, I've lowered my blood pressure, heart rate and cholesterol and raised my energy levels.

Huahine · April 2012

SoonToBeMsP:
Huahine:
Love that link LibraryChica.
My husband got so upset with my referring to myself as a cow that I eventually stopped. Not uddering those hateful words has actually helped my self image.
New clothing, waxing, pedicures and haircuts have been a huge help too. And every day I shower and do my hair and makeup, even if I don't plan to leave the house. It helps me feel better if the image in the mirror looks more like the old professional me.
Pun intended?

Of course! So glad someone caught it.

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