I'm not sure how I feel about our speech therapist.

GreenEyedGal · April 2012

So this chick has been giving him st for almost 6 months now and at first I loved her. In fact, I still (mostly) do but the way she's been bribing him lately is getting annoying.

For example, today she busted out her iPad. Immediately I knew this wasn't going to end well because my son LOVES Angry Birds. To say that he's obsessed, is an understatement. He plays on my phone so an iPad is like heaven to the kid. She wouldn't let him take a turn playing until he said "more". He has trouble saying it so he was getting frustrated with both himself and the st. So then she would say "You're not going to say 'more'? Ok, then only I get to play" and then she would turn her back on him and say "Wee, this is so fun!". I mean, really? He immediately started crying and screaming and my heart broke into two because she just seems to be teasing him. I know she has good intentions but can't she try another way? I had to suggest putting that thing away because it was clearly not working.

She does this every week with a different object/toy/bubbles, etc. She'll tease/bribe him until he starts crying and I find it annoying and frustrating!

Then on the progress report, she wrote down that he "cried and screamed during activities", but she didn't put why. He was a happy and just fine throughout the session until she busted out the iPad so I hate that she's making it sound like he started crying out of no where..

Am I being a softie? Would you feel the same way?

MBandBud · April 2012

Okay, my first reaction, honestly, was WTF?!? Seriously? This isn't st to me, this is bribery. Granted I don't know much about st, but this just doesn't seem right for any time of behavior adjustment. The part that put me over the edge was the 'wee, this is so much fun'. Uh, no. Siblings do that to each other and we tell them it is not kind and not approriate. Adults don't do that to children, and certainly not professionals that are there for behavior adjustment. Unacceptable and I personally would be calling and requesting a change. Never mind the report she gave. Sorry, this hit a nerve with me. I'm still saying in my head "are you kidding me?".

sasa625 · April 2012

I'm a speech therapist and I can't say that I would ever use this tactic. Granted I work with school-age kids (and haven't done early intervention since my grad school days) but the goal is to make it fun, not frustrating! She should've documented why he was frustrated/crying as well. If you like her and want to give her another chance, I would definitely talk to her about what happened and maybe suggest not using the iPad. There are plenty of other ways to engage a toddler!

lnle · April 2012

sasa625:
I'm a speech therapist and I can't say that I would ever use this tactic. Granted I work with school-age kids (and haven't done early intervention since my grad school days) but the goal is to make it fun, not frustrating! She should've documented why he was frustrated/crying as well. If you like her and want to give her another chance, I would definitely talk to her about what happened and maybe suggest not using the iPad. There are plenty of other ways to engage a toddler!

agreed. sounds like she was trying to motivate him with positive reinforcement but that she chose a behavior that was too difficult for him to do. So she either needs to choose an easier word for him to say and then work up to the more difficult ones, and/or choose a different reward. The way she went about it almost makes it seem like she thinks he is "refusing" to say certain words - like if there is a strong enough reinforcer that he'll suddenly "decide" to start saying really tough words.

[disclaimer: I'm not a speech therapist, but I am a psychologist]

GreenEyedGal · April 2012

Ok, at first I didn't know if I am overreacting or if I had a right to be concerned but now that you guys stated that that's just not right, I'm definitely going to talk to her next week or even call her sometime this week. And yes, absolutely no more iPad!

GreenEyedGal · April 2012

lnle:
sasa625:
I'm a speech therapist and I can't say that I would ever use this tactic. Granted I work with school-age kids (and haven't done early intervention since my grad school days) but the goal is to make it fun, not frustrating! She should've documented why he was frustrated/crying as well. If you like her and want to give her another chance, I would definitely talk to her about what happened and maybe suggest not using the iPad. There are plenty of other ways to engage a toddler!

agreed. sounds like she was trying to motivate him with positive reinforcement but that she chose a behavior that was too difficult for him to do. So she either needs to choose an easier word for him to say and then work up to the more difficult ones, and/or choose a different reward. The way she went about it almost makes it seem like she thinks he is "refusing" to say certain words - like if there is a strong enough reinforcer that he'll suddenly "decide" to start saying really tough words.

[disclaimer: I'm not a speech therapist, but I am a psychologist]

Granted, after she noticed that he couldn't/wouldn't say "more", she did give him the option of saying "please". He would say "tee!" so she would let him take a turn, which lasts all of 2 seconds on the iPad, then she would take it away and refused to give it back until he said either "more" or "please" again. Cue tears.

LALASEPT05 · April 2012

I was just looking at articles on teachmetotalk.com today and the speech therapist that writes this blog actually does use bribery as a tactic. In the article I was reading though she talked about using food or something they love and also talked about the fact that she has to balance with causing frustration because a child will not learn if they are frustrated and angry. Maybe you can talk to her about the tactic and how to better balance motivating him with frustrating him. Good luck!

MBandBud · April 2012

Yes, maybe her realizing what a hot button Angry birds is will help. Sorry if my reaction was inappropriately strong, but I just felt for your DS!

JillRock96 · April 2012

No, the way she handled it does not sound appropriate. I am not a speech pathologist, but I do complete psychological and educational assessments with preschoolers. I do use reinforcement (e.g., "when we finish this puzzle, we can play with the trucks for five minutes"), but NEVER in a teasing way like you described. It can be tricky to find something that is motivating for them but not so motivating that it becomes frustrating. I can tell you that if my approach let to tears and frustration, I would be adjusting my approach for sure.

I would talk to her next time and explain that though you feel she had the best intentions, from an outside perspective, it looked like teasing -- and he was clearly getting frustrated and upset. If that doesn't work, talk to her supervisor.

GreenEyedGal · April 2012

JillRock96:
No, the way she handled it does not sound appropriate. I am not a speech pathologist, but I do complete psychological and educational assessments with preschoolers. I do use reinforcement (e.g., "when we finish this puzzle, we can play with the trucks for five minutes"), but NEVER in a teasing way like you described. It can be tricky to find something that is motivating for them but not so motivating that it becomes frustrating. I can tell you that if my approach let to tears and frustration, I would be adjusting my approach for sure.
I would talk to her next time and explain that though you feel she had the best intentions, from an outside perspective, it looked like teasing -- and he was clearly getting frustrated and upset. If that doesn't work, talk to her supervisor.

Thanks so much for your input, very well said. I'm definitely going to talk to her. Luckily his 6 month evaluation is coming up next month which will be done by her supervisor so if his ST doesn't change, I'll for sure be talking to her.

MBandBud-I feel/felt bad for him too! I started getting flashbacks of when I was a kid and other kids would do that to me. My heart was breaking for my son when tears were streaming down his little face. This mama is on the prowl!

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