Car Rides -- Where do you sit?

TheMrs1009 · April 2012

I was reading another thread and noticed most women in that thread stated that they did not sit next to their babies in their vehicles. DS is three months old and I have yet to sit in the front with DH; I always sit next to DS in the back. We try to practice AP as best as we can, and I sit next to him to keep him company, return his paci to him, and do my best to soothe him as soon as he becomes fussy. Of course, I didn't plan to do this forever, but I did plan to do it for a while.

However, now I am wondering how DS would handle sitting back there alone. I do miss sitting next to DH but I also love playing in the back with DS. Prior to reading that threas, it had not occurred to me to leave my little guy back there alone. I wouldn't leave him for 20+ minutes alone and awake in his crib, and I don't see the car being significantly different.

What do you do? If your kids are no longer infants, what did you do when they were really young?

RandomLurker · April 2012

I sat in the back with DD the first few car trips. After that I had to sit in the front since I get really car sick. If she cried, we pulled over so I could comfort her. I always talk to her when driving, even when she was infant. The fact that she is still RF has not been a problem as far as car rides go. She talks away and tells me what she sees, we sing together, etc.

StrawberryAlarmClock · April 2012

Haha.

I used to sit in the back but not because it was necessarily AP, because I was neurotic and though he'd suffer positional asphyxia or something. He looked so impossibly tiny in that huge car seat. I probably sat back there most of his first year doing the se thing you're doing: blocking the sun, chatting with him, etc... I never put much thought into it regarding amount of time alone, I think I was just fascinated by my baby and wanted to spend every minute with him. Do what makes you happy. Just don't start calling DH "the chauffeur" I don't think my DH thought that was nearly as funny as I did.

erbear · April 2012

LOL. I have never sat in the back with my kids. I usually drive but DH usually sits next to me. Every once in a while, he'll go back there on a long trip and hang out for a little but yeah...front seat for us.

sucredee · April 2012

I sat next to her on the 3 block drive home from the hospital. The rest of the time I drive (usually alone with DD). If my DH is driving I sit in the passenger seat. The only other time I sat next to her is when we were visiting my sister and DH was driving, sister's BF was in the passenger seat and we were in the back. DD wanted out when I was sitting next to her so she actually does better if she is alone or has someone other than me sitting next to her. When she was bitty she usually would sleep or just be content. If she started fussing I would usually just stick my arm back there and let her suck on my pinkie since she never took a paci (I'm tall so I could do that without having to turn around) She is RF still at 22 month but she has the mirror so I can see her and she can see me. We have had the mirror since she was like 2 or 3 months old. We do very frequent 1.5 hour drives and she usually is pretty content. We listen to music while driving as well.

la_chivita · April 2012

i was wondering the same thing! my lo is 10+ months and i'm usually running errands by myself with him but when dh and i are together i still go in the back with him....weird i know....i think i will slowly transition myself back to the front seat.

Marsee · April 2012

StrawberryAlarmClock:
I used to sit in the back but not because it was necessarily AP, because I was neurotic . . .

This. I'm a nutjob. I still have a lot of PPA and DS went through a phase of HATING his carseat, so I'm always in the back with him. And I feel really special when we go to grandma's and the effing dog gets to sit in the front with DH. . . Wink

ETA: I'm not saying you're a nutjob if you sit in the back. If you want to do it, do it. LO won't be a baby forever.

TheMrs1009 · April 2012

Interesting responses! Marsee, our DS currently hates his car seat too.

Like a pp said, I too think I'm going to return to the front. DS is losing interest in his paci anyways, and I otherwise can't stop him from fussing if there is an issue without pulling over anyways... The only thing is the stupid shade on his car seat doesn't completely shield his eyes, and I feel so bad when I see him squinting because the sun is in his little eyes. :-(

tslmom87 · April 2012

I always sat in front for the most part, even the drive home I sat in front.

sami1784 · April 2012

The only time I've sat in the back was during the 2 weeks I couldn't drive. Since DH was away with the military, my mom stayed with me the first week and my dad stayed the second week, so when we went anywhere, I sat in the back with R. With DH deployed, I've no choice but to sit up front because I'm the one driving when R and I got anywhere. When DH gets home in a few weeks, I still plan on sitting up front.

tokenhoser · April 2012

When DS was little, he usually slept. Now, he's perfectly happy in the back. I sit in the front - either driving or with my DH (we do the vast majority of our driving during the week while DH is at work).

My sanity and comfort is important, too. I like conversing with my husband and not being carsick. If my baby was miserable, I would comfort him, but if he's happy (and he's always been happy in the car) I'm not going to spend my time doing a song and dance routine.

SirSleepsALot · April 2012

I sat in the back w/ both my kids on their rides home from the hospital and a few first trips but that's it. Back to the front seat.

GrayGhost13 · April 2012

I still sit in the back if my DH is driving. It just makes it easier to comfort DS if he gets bored or grumpy. DH and I can still talk even with me in the back, and it's less stressful to be able to see and talk to DS if he needs me.

StefandTodd · April 2012

I sat in the back until we moved LO to the convertible car seat at about 4.5 months. Prior to that, he cried constantly in the car and HATED it, so I would ride with him every time. Now though, he's totally content and happy back there, so I don't always ride with him. If we're going on a longer trip (like the 2 hours to my IL's), I will ride in back though still. Just depends how we're all feeling.

FrauElyse · April 2012

I sat in the back the first few times, but DS and I started going places pretty early without DH so DS got used to being in the back by himself. We talk to him, etc. If he gets really fussy or something, we pull over and sometimes for longer trips I sit in the back for part of the trip while he's awake. The rest of the time he just sleeps or chews on his lovey anyway. My being back there doesn't seem to add to his entertainment any (that sounds terrible, but it's true).

laurynfaerie · April 2012

Aside from the ride home from the hospital (my mom drove, and my sister was sitting shotgun) I've only sat in the back if he was going nuclear. I almost always sit in the front with DH. I feel like a child sitting in the back.

TheMrs1009 · April 2012

So I sat in the front today for the first time since I was pregnant....

DS didn't make a peep for the entire trip!! Crazy! DS was happier and I enjoyed being up front with DH.

CurbsideProphet · April 2012

DD hated her car seat as newborn, so usually someone would sit in the back with her. Once she started daycare at 4 months she had to sit in the back herself. Not sure when I started sitting in the front when DH and I were both in the car, maybe around 5 or 6 months. On long car rides we sometimes put someone in the back seat with her to help entertain her for longer.

jenni888 · April 2012

la_chivita:
i was wondering the same thing! my lo is 10+ months and i'm usually running errands by myself with him but when dh and i are together i still go in the back with him....weird i know....i think i will slowly transition myself back to the front seat.

This is exactly what I do. Obviously he can handle being back there by himself just fine because I drive that way with him several times every week. For some reason if someone else is doing the driving, I want to be back there with him "just in case". Heh.

[Deleted User] · April 2012

Only once, when she had a meltdown on a two hour drive home. But she loves being in the car. I like glancing back in the mirror and seeing her looking out the window and cooing to herself. I don't think there's anything "non-AP" about letting the baby have happy, unoccupied time to herself. Isn't one of the points of AP to foster independence?

Glad the first time went well!

ladybug122 · April 2012

I always sit next to my DD (she is 9 months old), or someone else sits by her if I'm driving. I avoid driving alone with her at all costs because she freaks out (I have tried everything to comfort her - everything!) and cries until she throws-up. So I really have no choice to other than to sit by her, because she does fine if I am beside her. I hope that once we get to switch to her new car seat she will like it better....probably not likely though.

duffmaker · April 2012

Now I'm not judging, but I never understood the need or desire to sit in the back with LO all the time. I rode in the back on the way home form the hospital and since have a couple times when DD was especially fussy and I couldn't feed her right then (she only ever fusses in the car if she's hungry), or if say it was super snowy or rainy out and I was too cold/wet/lazy to walk around the car and get in the front. If she loses her paci and starts to fuss, I'll just turn around in my seat and watch us in the mirror and put it back in her mouth. I AP, bed share, I was finally able to EBF around DD's 2 month mark, I baby wear but the thought of riding in the back with her never occurred to me.

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