Single Parents

I get jealous

DD has recently started spending weekends with BD. THe last 3 weekends. Its great however, DD freaks out when BD drops her off. It breaks my heart...she is a total daddies girl and even though I have been taking care of her for 2 years its like suddenly I don't matter as much as dad. It honestly worries me.
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Re: I get jealous

  • My step daughter (well, not for much longer and possibly the only thing I will miss about my marriage) used to cry when her father and I would pick her up because she was leaving her mom, then after STBXH and I started spending more time with her she would cry when we would drop her back of to her mom. I think maybe your daughter is getting more comfortable with her father, which while it may be hard for you it is a good thing. Unless your child's father is not a good dad then its imperative that you encourage them to have a good relationship. I get how it would be hard, and I'm sure one day I will know exactly how you feel. Just remember that while you might not have the warmest feeling for him, he did help you make your daughter so for that you have to appreciate him- even if thats the only thing about him you appreciate lol.
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  • What you're feeling is completely normal. You do the majority of the caring and living and raising. But, Daddy comes along and you're forgotten in a heartbeat. There's nothing wrong with feeling jealous, or even resentful. Try not to let it show. It's good for your daughter to be with her father. 

    I felt the same way. It had been just her and me for 12 years, then he comes moseying into her life and she thinks he's the best thing next to Dove Dark Chocolate. I felt a little rejected at first.

    It's like they forget all about Mom. But, she didn't. Not really. Deep down, where it counts, she knows who takes care of her. If she stayed with him too long, she would start wanting to go home and ask for you. "Hey this is fun and all, but where's mommy?" I promise.

  • I feel you lady. Ever since Rome got to spend time with his daddy he never wants anything to do with me any more. It's great that they have a good relationship but it sucks to feel forgotten. I agree with PP, encourage it if he's good with her. Every child has a longing to have a good father in their life.

    Oh and P.S. Watch out for the d-bag S.M. guy. You know who I'm talking about. Total player and will say anything to you to make your heart skip a beat. I deleted him from my FB as soon as I realized what an idiot he was. He was saying the same crap to a dozen other girls as he was saying to me. I'm sure he's saying them to you now too. Just watch yourself, he's full of lies and you don't deserve a guy like that messing with your head. 

  • That sucks Crying  I know the feeling.

    Have you tried changing up your exchanges? My DS will freak out if either parent tries to drop him off at the others front door (or car for that matter). I'm not sure why. If we do the exchanges somewhere other than the doorway or car he's fine. We do them in the yard. We let DS run around for a minute then whoever is leaving says bye and goes on their way. Then DS goes inside. If we do that he's totally fine. Last Saturday I made the mistake of carrying him to X's front door since he was tired and he totally flipped out and yelled no daddy even though I know he loves spending time with X. He's done the same thing to me too when I've tried to help get him out of X's car.

  • Were you high when you posted that you two were getting back together?

     

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  • imagefauxshelley:

    Were you high when you posted that you two were getting back together?

     

    That's constructive.  

    EDIT; hadn't read the pot thing. That makes what you said funny, and I apologize. 

  • imagetifanico:
    imageFyreFlyeRush:
    imagefauxshelley:

    Were you high when you posted that you two were getting back together?

     

    That's constructive.  

    You definitely don't know this poster.  She is all kinds of crazy. And when Shelley asked if she was high, it was literal not figuratively speaking. 

    This.  She's been posting for as long as I can remember.  She and BD have a tumulteous relationship and they were both caught with pot.  One second she hates him, the next she's back together with him.  She just posted about getting back together with him here:

    https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/64540017.aspx

    Basically she makes zero sense.  The best part is she posts and runs and no one has a clue what she's going to say next.  But it is safe to say it will be something completely random.  Probably because she's high.

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  • imagetifanico:
    imageFyreFlyeRush:
    imagefauxshelley:

    Were you high when you posted that you two were getting back together?

     

    That's constructive.  

    You definitely don't know this poster.  She is all kinds of crazy. And when Shelley asked if she was high, it was literal not figuratively speaking. 

    I get posts and posters mixed up sometimes. Too many nearly identical ones to keep up with. I vaguely recall that, now that you mention it. She's all over board where ex was concerned.

  • imageFyreFlyeRush:
    imagetifanico:
    imageFyreFlyeRush:
    imagefauxshelley:

    Were you high when you posted that you two were getting back together?

     

    That's constructive.  

    You definitely don't know this poster.  She is all kinds of crazy. And when Shelley asked if she was high, it was literal not figuratively speaking. 

    I get posts and posters mixed up sometimes. Too many nearly identical ones to keep up with. I vaguely recall that, now that you mention it. She's all over board where ex was concerned. We were all that na?ve and hopeful at one point.  Maybe not with our kids' fathers, but at some point. Lord knows I was.  

    Yes, but this has been going on for YEARS.  It's time for her to wise up. 

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  • Yep, I agree. You posted whilst I was tapping. So, I took that part out once I read your post. 
  • imagefauxshelley:

    Were you high when you posted that you two were getting back together?

     

    Were you high when you responded to this?

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