Hopefully last childcare related post: wwsaifd?

naflmj · April 2012

I am sorry this is long and the formatting from my phone stinks but I could really use some feedback. We had thought we'd go with a nanny for the ease of getting out of the house in the morning and put G in preschool a couple days/week for socialization. Well, he misses pre-school cut off by 1-2 months depending on the school so our only options would be centers which a) I really don't love and b) we really can't afford on top of a nanny. So, we are kind of back to square one.We can either have a nanny and G would be stuck home with the twins and no kiddo's his own age or send them all to daycare and just deal with the hassle of getting them out in the morning and scrambling to get everything done. I see pro's and cons to both but the biggest thing pushing me to daycare is he's asked every day he hasn't gone (we cut him to part time due to my leave) to go to his daycare. His daycare can't take 2 infants so it means a new daycare but one I'd be comfortable with and think he'd flourish at. If we did the nanny, we could get him in gymnastics and maybe one other class but I worry about a nanny being able to get him to them when the babies are still young. DH wants to do a nanny because he doesn't want to deal with drop off (he'd have to based on our work and daycare schedule) and doesn't think Graeme needs the socialization/structure and I think you can tell I'd prefer to send them to daycare. WWSAID?

armywife76 · April 2012

I guess my main question is do you think the nanny can handle all 3 and still have time to take G outside and do all the things he'll be begging to do this summer? If so, that might be easiest in terms of drop off/pick up, but I'm sure you could handle that, too if you decided to go the DC route. Do you have family in the area who don't work and could take DS to the classes you're talking about? One thing to think about too is the extra germs at DC and the work you could potentially miss if one, two, or three got sick at different times and passed it around. Having a nanny would keep a lot of that down. Not sure if I helped you decide, but maybe a few things to think about. GL!

pinkcallalily · April 2012

Knowing how much my son loves daycare, I don't think I could ever pull him out. I lost my job last fall and we left my son in daycare part time because he loves it so much (it also gave me time to job hunt). We had to put him back in full time a couple months ago because of restrictions I was given for the rest of this pregnancy. He actually seems much happier being there full time than he was only part time. We will go back to part time once this baby is born and I hope he does well with it.

My son loves the interaction he gets at daycare and talks about his friends and teachers more and more everyday as he's learning to communicate more. I really don't think he would be happy with a nanny or even home with me everyday (even if we were going to classes a couple times a week).

I think dropoff with a toddler and twins will be difficult at first, but I also think everyone will get into a routine. I would lean towards putting them all in daycare, but this is mostly because we've had such a great experience with our daycare.

Imanurse03 · April 2012

It does sound like you'd prefer the daycare option. Personally, I'd go with daycare, too. I'd worry about a nanny being able to devote enough time and energy to your older child. What is the cost difference between nanny, gymnastics, etc vs daycare?

I'm sure you'd get into a routine quickly with dropping all 3 off at daycare. Yes, it will be hairy in the beginning but you'll (your DH) will get used to it.

Yes, you may have more illnesses to deal with at daycare but to me, that's just part of going to daycare. Not sure this helped any but good luck with whatever you decide!

naflmj · April 2012

Imanurse03:
It does sound like you'd prefer the daycare option. Personally, I'd go with daycare, too. I'd worry about a nanny being able to devote enough time and energy to your older child. What is the cost difference between nanny, gymnastics, etc vs daycare?

I'm sure you'd get into a routine quickly with dropping all 3 off at daycare. Yes, it will be hairy in the beginning but you'll (your DH) will get used to it.

Yes, you may have more illnesses to deal with at daycare but to me, that's just part of going to daycare. Not sure this helped any but good luck with whatever you decide!

This is my concern. If they were all a bit older I wouldn't worry so much but I know infant twins are going to be a lot of work. Cost wise, it's basically a wash which is why we can't do nanny and a center part time. I wish it didn't come down to cost but I can't put us in such a tight place that we'd be dipping into savings, just not fair to the family.

And no, while my mom just lost her job, she is 45 minutes away and will be actively looking for work so while she could help with Graeme's activities short term it's not a permanent solution (and she's a bit of a flake). He won't be in daycare for the summer because he never is so family members are going to help with either the twins or bringing him places.

dundasgirl · April 2012

Is there anyway that you could extend your maternity leave one or two months so that your son meets the age requirement for preschool?

If not, reading between the lines, it looks like if your DH would agree to daycare for all three...you would prefer that.

Mr.&MrsS · April 2012

If he misses the cut off for pre school, does that mean he cant start until next year? Or that he cant start for the 1-2 months he is early? If I could send him in a couple of months I would go with the nanny option.

But if the only option was to keep him home with a nanny and no kids his own age, I would suck it up and deal with day care. I think it would be better for him to stick with his routine, structure, and being able to socialize with kids his own age.

LVBlvd · April 2012

Having had newborn twins and a toddler in my house, I'd go with a nanny. No way would I have wanted to try and get myself ready and all the kids, be out the door, and to work at a reasonable time.

Do you have any nursery schools or mothers day outs? He could go 1 or 2 days a week, and it is inexpensive.

If not, I know I was able to entertain and teach my 2 year old while caring for new or twins. With my snap n go stroller, we were able to do lots of fun things. As they have gotten older, it's more challenging, but they are also now playmates for Paige.

I just want to give you perspective that a nanny (if you find a good one!) could totally handle it and meet all 3 of your kids' needs.

Mouseygail · April 2012

Mr.&MrsS:
If he misses the cut off for pre school, does that mean he cant start until next year? Or that he cant start for the 1-2 months he is early? If I could send him in a couple of months I would go with the nanny option.

But if the only option was to keep him home with a nanny and no kids his own age, I would suck it up and deal with day care. I think it would be better for him to stick with his routine, structure, and being able to socialize with kids his own age.

This, I think. tough decision! (((HUGS)))

naflmj · April 2012

Mr.&MrsS:
If he misses the cut off for pre school, does that mean he cant start until next year? Or that he cant start for the 1-2 months he is early? If I could send him in a couple of months I would go with the nanny option.

But if the only option was to keep him home with a nanny and no kids his own age, I would suck it up and deal with day care. I think it would be better for him to stick with his routine, structure, and being able to socialize with kids his own age.

It follows the school year so he can't start until the following year otherwise I'd deal with his break in routine for a couple months.

MonkeysGirl05 · April 2012

I think I'd go the route of all three in daycare. Eventually, that will be the easier and more cost effective route. It may be difficult to do drop of at first, but it is doable. We have a friend that lost his wife and he was taking a toddler and twins to daycare by himself everyday. Plus, I think kids benefit from socialization/structure.

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Hopefully last childcare related post: wwsaifd?

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