I bought everything for Chase's b-day party before all of this came up, and if I'm still going to have it on the 21st as planned, I need to get the invites out in the next couple days. It's a circus party theme, mostly family and about 5 friend with kids. I'll be out about $100 including perishable food/custom invites, etc. if I postpone/cancel it, but to be honest the thought of germs potentially coming into my house getting Grant sick again is making me nervous. Would you go ahead and have on the 21st so Chase doesn't get the shaft (and ask people not to touch/hold the baby), postpone it a month or so until after Grant's surgery, or just scrap it until next year? We could always just have a small celebration with just us, I guess. ETA: just remembered the circus-themed outfits for both from etsy that I ordered that won't fit next year. Make that $200. Crap.
Re: B-day party advice. Cancel/postpone?
I went ahead and had Betsy's party the year Carly was born. Carly was 5 weeks early and I was supposed to have her party the week Carly came home from the NICU. I postposed it by 2 weeks, mostly because I hadn't been home in 2 weeks and I knew my house would be a disaster.
DH's aunt held the baby almost the whole time and kept her away from the little kids that were there. She didn't get sick (it was during the swine flu hysteria).
I'm not sure what he is having surgery for, but depending on what the docs say, I might postpone it a month or so. But I would still have a party for him, even if it's just immediate family and the only picture you get is him blowing out his candles with his circus shirt on. You only turn 2 once!
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I would postpone it. You aren't shafting him at all! I like to have Reed and Penny's parties on the same day and their birthdays are 6 weeks apart so he has to wait:) He doesn't really care as long as he gets to eat cake.
And I saw your edit about the outfits...not wasted money at all! Do a little photo shoot with the boys in their outfits ahead of time. Super cute!!
Could someone you trust watch the baby outside of the house during the party? Maybe a grandparent and then have that person come for the last few minutes, or for cake or something? I'm sure it would be a hard call b/c that trusted person would probably want to be there for the older one's party.
Whatever you decide it will be the right thing for you!