Circumcision

trojas · April 2012

So, I know some women know from the very beginning that they will circumcise their boy(s). I, however, am not one of these women. I don't know what to do!

My DH is not, so it seems like the 'natural' thing to do. A part of me says not to do it b/c that's how he came into this world- why mess with mother nature? Another part of me says it'll save him embarrassment when he gets older. My DH's is perfectly fine and when erect it looks like all the other penises in the world.

Did you circumcise your boy?

Did you base your decision on whether or not daddy was circumcised?

cmurphy09 · April 2012

I'm having a daughter. But personally I would not.

Best thing to do is research as much as possible & make the decision yourself.

gisa886 · April 2012

We are because we want to. Either you do or don't. There is really no other reason to give.

stemms8810 · April 2012

We have decided to circumcise our baby boy when he is born. My DH is circumcised but that wasn't why we chose to do it. It is a very personal decision that you and your DH will need to discuss so I recommend doing what you both think is the right decision for you and your baby.

Patella1129 · April 2012

We did not circumcise our son, even though DH is circumcised. After doing a lot of research, we felt that it was just unnecessary surgery. It's not necessarily more hygenic/cleaner/healthier to circumcise--it's really just a cosmetic issue. And I'm not particularly worried about him "being made fun of" because circumcision rates are actually dropping in the U.S. I think that when he is old enough to be changing the locker room, there will be a lot more guys who "look like him" than there would have been when our DHs were growing up.

mrs+harlow · April 2012

gisa886:
We are because we want to. Either you do or don't. There is really no other reason to give.

This. I did defer this ultimate decision to DH , though. We are Team Green and don't know but have decided if baby is a boy he will be circumcised.

MRSR08 · April 2012

DH is circumcised so we are choosing to do the same with our son. That was one decision I let my DH take care of.

kjem182 · April 2012

We will be circumcising. Dh is, and I suppose that helped sway us. I also feel some of the stats lean towards less infections with circumcisions, but I don't feel the need to debate that. With as torturous as the name decision has been, I'm pretty glad we just both agreed to this without needing to discuss it.

KatFCo · April 2012

Patella1129:
We did not circumcise our son, even though DH is circumcised. After doing a lot of research, we felt that it was just unnecessary surgery. It's not necessarily more hygenic/cleaner/healthier to circumcise--it's really just a cosmetic issue. And I'm not particularly worried about him "being made fun of" because circumcision rates are actually dropping in the U.S. I think that when he is old enough to be changing the locker room, there will be a lot more guys who "look like him" than there would have been when our DHs were growing up.

These are our reasons for not circumcising as well. There are few studies that show it is really beneficial, and it can cause severe pain for the child--we just didn't like the whole "he's a baby, he'll forget about it" argument. For us, it was deliberately causing our child pain for no reason.

We aren't too worried about the "being made fun of" argument either, particularly because we intend to instill in both our children pride in who they are that doesn't rely on appearances. Our daughter has a large scar that goes across her lower abdomen, which, when she gets older, will set her apart from her peers, but we're not going to teach her that it is necessary to look like everyone else.

Stefaniepr · April 2012

Nope. DH is not, and there is no need IMO. None of my friends did either. It's not as common as it used to be.

EmilyXLC · April 2012

I was indifferent on the issue, but the hubby is circumcised & he said he would prefer our little one to be, too. I think it's one of those 'how do you explain to Zach why his peepee looks different than daddy's' if he sees him naked... but I dunno.

Davesgrl2011 · April 2012

MRSR08:

DH is circumcised so we are choosing to do the same with our son. That was one decision I let my DH take care of.

This. We just wanted Owen to "look like daddy" when it came time for potty training or whatever. I gave the decision to my DH.

kincaid44 · April 2012

We are most definitely circumcising. Based on my research, I do believe that it is healthier. Also, someone mentioned that they didn't circumcise, and ended up with a son who was autistic, and he wasn't able to clean it and take care of if properly by himself. I wouldn't want to risk that.

Gismo123 · April 2012

KatFCo:
Patella1129:
We did not circumcise our son, even though DH is circumcised. After doing a lot of research, we felt that it was just unnecessary surgery. It's not necessarily more hygenic/cleaner/healthier to circumcise--it's really just a cosmetic issue. And I'm not particularly worried about him "being made fun of" because circumcision rates are actually dropping in the U.S. I think that when he is old enough to be changing the locker room, there will be a lot more guys who "look like him" than there would have been when our DHs were growing up.

These are our reasons for not circumcising as well. There are few studies that show it is really beneficial, and it can cause severe pain for the child--we just didn't like the whole "he's a baby, he'll forget about it" argument. For us, it was deliberately causing our child pain for no reason.

We aren't too worried about the "being made fun of" argument either, particularly because we intend to instill in both our children pride in who they are that doesn't rely on appearances. Our daughter has a large scar that goes across her lower abdomen, which, when she gets older, will set her apart from her peers, but we're not going to teach her that it is necessary to look like everyone else.

I agree with both these statements. DH is not circumsized and he survived just fine and is very sanitary. The reason circumsition is on the decline is because a lot of insurance companies are no longer covering the procedure. IMO it's nothing but cosmetic surgery....no proven health benefits from having it done.

JaiMacreiberts · April 2012

I'm having a girl, but I wouldn't have had a boy circumcised. It's his body and he can make that decision latter on when he's old enough and can have pain meds -- why should I take that away from him? Also, from talking to my uncirced friends, they've never had problems with infections and they think they enjoy sex more than their circed friends.

Of course, there is some condition that only circumcision can fix (can't remember what) so that would be an exception.

Punken13 · April 2012

MRSR08:

DH is circumcised so we are choosing to do the same with our son. That was one decision I let my DH take care of.

. This exactly for us

Timeg · April 2012

We will circumcise our son when he is born. His daddy is, but we also did our own research and came to the conclusion ourselves. It is a personal decision either way.

KrissyMiss · April 2012

I've researched the issue and have found arguments for both sides. I told DH it was up to him, so we are getting our son circumsized. The decision doesn't bother me in the slightest.

BarefootRI · April 2012

We are Team Green so I have done a ton of research on this topic in case we have a boy. We have decided against circumcision if it is a boy. DH is circumcised but agrees that it is unnecessary and not something we want to do. I don't judge those who decide to do it, but it's not for us. FWIW, I learned a lot from The Whole Network. They have a website and a facebook page that I would suggest checking out if you're still on the fence about it.

I would also recommend watching a video of the actual procedure. That is not something I want to put my brand new baby through for purely cosmetic reasons. I can't get on board with the whole "he needs to look like Daddy" argument. As a young child, he won't care and it can be explained very simply that everyone looks different. By the time he would actually understand the difference, I would sure hope he is not comparing penises with his dad!

I also don't like the "hygiene" excuse. America is one of the very few countries that performs routine infant circumcision. Most men in the world remain intact and I highly doubt they are all "dirty". From everything I have read, there is no extra work to cleaning it before the skin is retractable. Just wipe it clean like you would a finger. When he is at the age where it is retractable, all he has to do is pull the skin back and give it a quick wash. Nothing complicated!

If we have a son and he ever decides he wants to be circumcised when he is older, that will be his choice and at least he can have pain medication. It is much different as an adult when the foreskin is retractable. As a a baby, the foreskin is still fused to the penis so it is ultimately being ripped off much like having a fingernail ripped off the skin of your finger. I can't imagine!

Again, we are Team Green so I may have done all this research for nothing, but I have found all the information fascinating. I always just assumed boys were circumcised and that was that. I have never seen an intact penis in person and I honestly never thought there was an "option". I just thought it was what all boys had done at birth, until I started looking into it. I'm so glad I did my research! But like I said, I truly don't judge anyone at all who chooses to have it done. I have lots of friends with baby boys and it's split about half and half with who did and did not have it done for their son. The above reasons are just why I would never do it for my own son.

BarefootRI · April 2012

This is a good read from The Whole Network if you are still deciding.

https://www.thewholenetwork.org/14/post/2011/08/50-reasons-to-leave-it-alone.html

smacb · April 2012

We circumcised our son and will circumcise this baby. The whole procedure didn't seem to bother him and only took a few minutes. My DH is and we wanted them to match. I read a lot on the topic for and against. It can reduce infection, make the penis easier to keep clean and reduce rates of STDs.

trojas · April 2012

BarefootRI:
This is a good read from The Whole Network if you are still deciding.

https://www.thewholenetwork.org/14/post/2011/08/50-reasons-to-leave-it-alone.html

Thank you!

trojas · April 2012

I just looked it up on Youtube and honestly, I couldn't finish watching it.

Seriously, I almost threw up. It is so inhumane! (IMO). And to think, its not medically necessary!!! I"m in shock, I really am.

brideofscowboy · April 2012

Patella1129:
We did not circumcise our son, even though DH is circumcised. After doing a lot of research, we felt that it was just unnecessary surgery. It's not necessarily more hygenic/cleaner/healthier to circumcise--it's really just a cosmetic issue. And I'm not particularly worried about him "being made fun of" because circumcision rates are actually dropping in the U.S. I think that when he is old enough to be changing the locker room, there will be a lot more guys who "look like him" than there would have been when our DHs were growing up.

This. and well said.

DH and I thought we were decided on circumsizing DS...until he was born. We did the research but I wasn't completely sold. I asked for the info binder one last time while we were still in the hospital (Day 2) and we decided against it with no regrets.

For us, hygiene is a hygiene issue and has nothing to do with excess skin; the rates in Canada have pretty much flip-flopped..more boys are not circ'd; mental illness can happen at anytime (head-injury, etc) so doing it 'just in case' our son was autistic etc, didn't seem rational; and to look or not look like someone else just doesn't make sense b/c everyone is different...besides, I'd hope my son isn't flashing his penis to everyone anyway. I also work in healthcare and have seen both sides of the spectrum: Uncirc'd boys who have issues and end up getting circ'd, and circ'd boys who have problems from batched circumcisions. Some need further surgery, others don't.

I guess what I'm saying is, it's a personal decision and for us circumcision is unneccessary. We won't be circumsizing DS2 either.

BlackWolf89 · April 2012

My husband and I are planning on circumcising our son. My husband is and that seems like the natural thing to do for us. However, my sister had her son in October, and hes not circumcised but his daddy is. She decided to just leave it alone and hes a perfectly healthy baby. Either way, I don't think you can go wrong.

theone07 · April 2012

We are not doing it. DH is one 1 of 3 boys in his family and the only one not circ'ed. He had a bleeding issue at birth so my IL's decided against it. He grew up looking different than both his brothers & dad and turned out fine. He says he never had anyone in the locker rooom say anything. It never bothered him.

I really don't see a need for it anymore. As long as you teach your LO as he grows how to clean himself properly. On a side note, my friend has 2 little boys, both are circ'ed. Her oldest had a bad circ that had to be redone at 18 months and he still has trouble and complains about it hurting him. He's now 3. She strongly wishes she hadn't had the procedure done on him.

wheelsonthebus · April 2012

KatFCo:

Patella1129:
We did not circumcise our son, even though DH is circumcised. After doing a lot of research, we felt that it was just unnecessary surgery. It's not necessarily more hygenic/cleaner/healthier to circumcise--it's really just a cosmetic issue. And I'm not particularly worried about him "being made fun of" because circumcision rates are actually dropping in the U.S. I think that when he is old enough to be changing the locker room, there will be a lot more guys who "look like him" than there would have been when our DHs were growing up.

These are our reasons for not circumcising as well. There are few studies that show it is really beneficial, and it can cause severe pain for the child--we just didn't like the whole "he's a baby, he'll forget about it" argument. For us, it was deliberately causing our child pain for no reason.

We aren't too worried about the "being made fun of" argument either, particularly because we intend to instill in both our children pride in who they are that doesn't rely on appearances. Our daughter has a large scar that goes across her lower abdomen, which, when she gets older, will set her apart from her peers, but we're not going to teach her that it is necessary to look like everyone else.

This for us too. DH felt very strongly that he did not want our son circed even though he is. He said he always wished he wasn't. I am very happy with my choice not to circ my son. I don't even think about him being made fun of. More and more boys are not getting the procedure done these days. I plan on teaching my son to be proud of his penis and proud of his body.

wheelsonthebus · April 2012

trojas:

I just looked it up on Youtube and honestly, I couldn't finish watching it.

Seriously, I almost threw up. It is so inhumane! (IMO). And to think, its not medically necessary!!! I"m in shock, I really am.

This is what really sealed the deal for me too. The males in my family are not circed, while my H is. I watched a video of the procedure and it made me cry and I had to shut it off. It was then that I knew with complete confidence that it was NOT the right choice for us.

JNoelleE · April 2012

I think basing it on whether the father is is silly. And I don't think it will save him from embarrassment later because more and more people are realizing it is not medically necessary, and its about 50/50 right now. Meaning just as many men (if not more) will not be circumcised when he is older.

tessatewks · April 2012

I made the awful mistake of circumcising my first son. That is a mistake we will not be repeating.

Please check out The Whole Network.

A large (nearly half or more) percentage of Americans are saying NO to circumcision. Soon, circ will NOT be the norm and in some places it certainly is NOT the norm anymore. Unfortunately where I live (Ohio) it still the norm, but I hope to see that change over the years.

I'm not at all worried about my intact son getting teased. Truly, boys do not go around commenting on other boys' penises in the locker room. Not even sure how the locker room argument ever came about. If a boy commented, THEY would be teased for being gay. Not only that, but my sons will be raised to know intact is best and all the benefits. If they were ever teased, they'd have some pretty awesome comebacks saying how they'll be better in bed.

DH is circumcised. When he learned it was an unnecessary, purely cosmetic procedure and all that he lost through the procedure, he felt robbed and extremely angry. Much of how he felt resembled the symptoms of a child who has been molested - he was stripped naked, strapped down without his consent an sexually assaulted. It makes him so angry to think the did that to his first son and enrages him when people turn a blind eye to the educuation he tries to provide expectant parents about the harm of circumcison.

Circumcision is EXTREMELY painful. Many babies go into shock. Over a HUNDRED babies die every year from the procedure. Another good site is Drmomma.org It interferes with breastfeeding too.

It's just plain not worth it. I wouldn't give my baby girl a boob job (or if you want to argue "medical" reasons - girls are MUCH more prone to UTI's but it is illegal to circ them!!!! talk about DOUBLE STANDARDS!) and I'm not giving my son a penis job for purely cosmetic reasons. Besides, now that I'm informed and have more knowledge than the average person, CLEARLY an intact penis is more cosmetically appealing anyway. A penis with a big scar and a dry, calloused glands (head) is not more attractive at all! It also doesn't perform as well.

monkeyqueen · April 2012

trojas:
BarefootRI:
This is a good read from The Whole Network if you are still deciding.

https://www.thewholenetwork.org/14/post/2011/08/50-reasons-to-leave-it-alone.html
Thank you!

Yeah......that's not even remotely close to how my son was circumsized......

BelleWithABlade · April 2012

monkeyqueen:
trojas:
BarefootRI:
This is a good read from The Whole Network if you are still deciding.

https://www.thewholenetwork.org/14/post/2011/08/50-reasons-to-leave-it-alone.html
Thank you!
Yeah......that's not even remotely close to how my son was circumsized......

Yeah I can tell you as a physician that's not how it's done lol. How come these circ threads always end up with someone posting some stupid, inflammatory video. At least this thread has avoided the equally dumb statement comparing male circumcision to female circumcision lol.

There are proven health benefits, one can't argue that (a quick pubmed search will give you unbiased, peer reviewed literature). They just aren't earth staggering. You need to decide if the benefits and change in cosmesis is important to you and your family. I think people that try to sway you with biased websites and inflammatory videos are trying to make themselves feel better about their choice more then they are trying to help you.

Pachita · April 2012

I am circumcising my boy. For one, his dad is, but also, my DH's brother was not circumcised when he was born and he had to get circumcised at the age of 10 for medical/health reasons. It was a really painful experience for him at that age, and I would rather have my child circumcised when he's born rather than when he's older.

Julia_JJ · April 2012

EmilyXLC:
I was indifferent on the issue, but the hubby is circumcised & he said he would prefer our little one to be, too. I think it's one of those 'how do you explain to Zach why his peepee looks different than daddy's' if he sees him naked... but I dunno.

Seriously? You just say everyone looks different. What will you do when he asks why you have breasts? Or why daddy's penis is so much bigger? It's not a big deal.

Blue Pansy · April 2012

cmurphy09:
I'm having a daughter. But personally I would not.
Best thing to do is research as much as possible & make the decision yourself.

Same here. We agreed before we knew the sex that we would not be circumcising, because a) we feel it's an unnecessary procedure that is not in keeping with our parenting philosophy, and b) it has a high error rate in my region, which necessitates secondary procedures -- so I'd rather take the risk that our sons might need a circumcision for medical reasons down the road rather than have it done twice.

Butterbrot · April 2012

We will most certainly not circumcise. It never even crossed our minds. I don't understand why people think they need to "fix" something that's completely natural.

crlacey · April 2012

DH is circumcised, but he decided not to do that to our DS. Since there is no medical benefit to it, he decided that he would never cut his DD so why would he do that to his son?

But really it's a personal choice that you and DH should research the pros and cons for and then decide.

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