anyone BFing adopted baby?

vanceke08 · April 2012

please tell me about your experience.

MagickalNarwhal · April 2012

I had planned to but when it came down to it I had already experienced so many failures with my body during ttc that were really hard on my self esteem and I didn't want to spend the first few months with a baby in a shame spiral if it didn't work out, or attached to a pump. We are feeding our baby with about 80% donor breast milk though, and I am just thinking about trying to induce lactation now (son is almost 2 months).

We tried to feed with a lactaid system when we first brought him home so he could eat at the breast, but he really struggled with it and I wasn't 100% committed.

I do know at least 1 or 2 adoptive moms from another board that did it though, so it's possible!

vanceke08 · April 2012

thank you! I have not been able to find anyone who has even attempted this. I know what you mean about the shame spiral; I am so worried. my GYN said so much of it is mental and encouraged me to look in the mirror and tell myself over and over that it WILL happen. I'm nervous but excited; hoping it works, so I can at least experience this part of my body sustaining a baby, you know?

inlovewithB · April 2012

I tried! I took herbs, did acupuncture, hypnosis, met with a lactation consultant, purchased the "Lact Aid" system and pumped every 2-3 hours for 2 months before DD arrived. She latched great from day 1, but was given formula every 3 hours in the hospital. I wish I would have told the hospital staff I was trying to BF, but I was so nervous her birthmother would think it was strange and decide not to sign consent (stupid me) so I did it in "private" when the nurses weren't around and I was alone with DD.

Because we spent 4 days in the hospital on a formula schedule it was hard for me to not feed her a bottle when she would start screaming of hunger. The Lact-Aid was too much for me in those early days of no sleep and by the time I was ready to try it DD would no longer latch.

I could have tried harder!! I didn't start taking domperidone until she was 3 weeks old (it takes a LONG time for it to arrive in the mail) and I gave up on pumping once we brought her home.

I have some regrets about not trying harder, but I am so thankful for the short breastfeeding relationship we did have. That first moment she latched on in the hospital made me feel like I was FINALLY a MOM. I feel like it helped us get to know each other in those early weeks. With our next adoption I WILL try harder for now we try to use as much donor BM as possible.

vanceke08 · April 2012

I feel like the birth mom will think I'm weird too!!! I just haven't said anything about, but I know she will find out in the hospital if I try to hide it...

I don't want to freak her out.

my GYN just told me to pump every 4 hrs, and then said she will put me on reglan when the baby is born. I am not sure what to expect. I have been pumping, but I don't know when to expect something to happen. I really want to be able to do this. I am worried it won't work, just like my body never cooperates when it is supposed to do a function it was created for, but that's another story I suppose thanks for sharing, I will keep at it and try as hard as I can. I will try to think of some way to tell her and the hospital so that they don't start LO on formula. What an awkward conversation that is going to be....

MagickalNarwhal · April 2012

Have you checked out asklenore.com? There is a lot of good info there. I understand Reglan to be used a lot less for lactation these days, but I forget why. Is there a La Leche League in your area? If so definitely try and attend those meetings. There are a few different protocols that you can use to try to induce lactaion depending on how much time you have, which are listed on the asklenore site, and there are definitely things that you can do in addition to just pumping.

Jermysgirl · April 2012

Page Frklsbride on Married Life on the Nest. She has tons of information.

vanceke08 · April 2012

thanks!!

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