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NICU mamas--Let's Chat. (longish)
DD is almost two years old and while I'm fine with our circumstances, the memories of those two weeks in NICU still haunt me. Well, now I have an amazing opportunity to work in the very NICU where DD was (I'm an RN). I've applied for the position and I'm cautiously excited about it. I've always wanted to work NICU, but after DD was there I was sure I could never do it. But then the desire started coming back, and lo and behold, there are now 7 positions there. I'm a spiritual person and I believe that God is leading me to work there. I feel like I can easily relate to those parents and it would give me an opportunity to share our testimony. But I'm so scared that I'll walk in DD's room to care for a baby and I won't be able to function.
So I guess my question is this...Would you be able to do it? I know it will be very hard at first, but do you think it'll get easier with time?
I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. 1Samuel 1:27
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Re: NICU mamas--Let's Chat. (longish)
I could do it. We were there for 9 days and went through pretty much everything (he was full term so while his weight and growth weren't a concern everything else was).
However, being pregnant with a baby who has a 50/50 chance of being there has prevented me from being able to go back just now. We went back to visit some friends and drop a car seat off for them and about 30 seconds after we got to the baby's bedside I was swallowing back tears. DS and I gracefully left.
However, DS is doing very well, and while the NICU was an awful experience we've had so much growth and good times since then. The part most upsetting to me was the way I was talked to, or the times I let the nurses be rude and I didn't say anything, or not standing up for DS to the nasty nurse who didn't want to take out his NG tube, etc.
I worked as administrative support for hte NICU and Family Birth Center before my kids were born. I didn't have a horrible NICU experience. My children were born a bit early but they were in no danger. It was a very positive experience.
I will say that before my daughter was born, I left my position there because I had multiple miscarriages. Because I had a positive outcome and my daughter and sons were born, I feel like I could return there.
I think that being a former NICU Mom would make you a valuable employee. : )
Our LO was in the NICU for 27 days, after being born at 39 weeks, 3 days. We had NO idea we were going to wind up there. His stay included emergency surgery, the "incident" as everyone referred to it, when he stopped breathing, a sleep study, on and on.
I went back there on Christmas Eve last year, to bring goodies for the families there. We came home on 12/23/2010, so I'm especially aware of how difficult it is to be there during the holidays. For me, it was very cathartic to go, and I found that as LO wasn't there, I didn't have the same emotional tie to that room as I did before.
One final thing, our LO's primary nurse had been a NICU mom. For me, that was a huge help because she knew exactly what we were going through.
It takes a very special person to be a NICU or PICU nurse and they can make a difference in the life of the child and the entire experience for the parents.
I came very very close to specializing in Neonatology during training. I had some scholarship obligations which prevented me from doing so and now the thought of another 3 years of training is somewhat unbearable. I have always loved the NICU, the rhythm, the science, the families. Loved it more before DS spent 111 days there amd DD passed away, but whatever. It was very interesting to be on the other side. In some ways is was hard for me to just be mom but I also was able to anticipate things and not get to crazy. I also had to try really hard to focus just on DS and not wonder what everyone elses story was- hard to do in a small open unit.
Going into the NICU now does not phase me. We bring DS back around holidays and his birthday. I am considering looking into doing NICU follow up or some other NICU position at some point.
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