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What do you wish you knew/asked?

GusGus80GusGus80 member
in Adoption

H and I are just starting to explore international adoption.  It is definately a little overwhelming, but we are very excited.  Any tips?  Anything you wish you had known or asked when you first started?  We are trying to get all our ducks in a row before we 'officially' start the process.  

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Re: What do you wish you knew/asked?

  • srmmm09srmmm09

    I don't think this exists, but I WISH there was one chart or grid or something with every country and its specifics. If there was some sort of excel sheet or menu where you could put in your ages, the age and gender and wait time and cost and everything else that factors in... So many decisions!

    I mean, for us the biggest thing was the age of the child, even more than the health level. Second to that is the cost; some countries are tens of thousands of dollars more or less expensive.Also a big factor is wait time. We actually aren't in a rush, but many people just want to get in the shortest line (which is totally fine; if I didn't have DS, I'd be in that line too, probably!).

    The thing about agencies is they will probably only suggest programs that they work with. Which makes sense, but you know, there are a hundred countries out there with orphans who need parents.

    Oh, another thing we just found out is stability can be a factor. If y'all roll with punches (or can dance on a carpet that's being pulled out from under you), you will be able to handle a newer program or country whose requirements change frequently.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Lilypie Waiting to Adopt tickers
    Application approved Dec '11
    Mar '12: Homestudy interrupted by change in Uganda requirements - where do we go from here?
    After searching and searching, back with Uganda but with our homestudy agency's program.
    Homestudy complete July 19
    USCIS I-600A submitted July 20. Biometrics appointments arrived Aug 17; fingerprinted Aug 21; 171H received Sept 25th. On the wait list Oct 1st: #18. By Jan 25th, we're #13!
    Come home, baby A!
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  • GusGus80GusGus80 member

    Thanks!

    So far we have been trying to just narrow down our options.  We know we can't do the countries with lengthy travel requirements, so that has actually helped narrow down our choices quite a bit.   Then I've been trying to work the numbers out as far as costs.  I'm working with the numbers they give you (I know travel is not included), but I honestly have no idea if the number they give you is accurate.  You hear so many stories (friend of a friend stories, of course) of people going through the process and they keep needing to come up with more and more money.  At the moment, we are looking into Bulgaria.    

    By nature, I'm very detail oriented and a planner.  So I'm trying to not let excitement get the best of us and just jump in without a good grasp of what we need to know.  

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