I'm 24 weeks pregnant today, and we haven't bought anything for our baby yet. We have six onsies and three pairs of socks that we received as a gift, and I'm making two quilts, but that's it. I'm wondering if I should be freaking out about this. Because...
The reason we haven't bought any of the 'big things', like the bassinet, is because we're moving tomorrow. We didn't see the point in getting something like that and then having to worry about moving it. Same with our changing table: DH is making it, but where we are now he doesn't have space to work, and again it would be one more thing to move.
The other big one is money. We've had some serious financial problems recently and are only just getting back on our feet. Still, DH's next paycheck, which will be here in about a week, is 'already spent' (because of security deposits etc on our new place). It won't be until the end of this month that we'll have any money left over.
Also... I can't help but feel like all of this is too good to be true. I have so much. I have an incredible husband; two beautiful and loving pets; amazing friends; a roof over my head; food on my table; and although money is tight we can get by. I wouldn't say I'm not a nice person but plenty of my friends are the most wonderful people in the world and life keeps dealing them really terrible s**t. I know this is going to sound morbid, but I'm so scared I might lose the baby. I have no 'reason' to think that I might; I just don't feel like I deserve her.
Do I need to start buying things now? Can I put it off a little longer?
(I know that cribs tend to take a looong time to ship, but we're having a bassinet stroller which baby will be sleeping in at first. We won't even be buying a crib until after baby's born)
Re: We haven't bought anything for baby yet...
Are you having a shower? Then I would say you can wait. What do you mean bassinet stroller? Something like the Baby Jogger City Select or Uppa Baby Vista one? Your LO cannot sleep in that ... it is a SIDS risk.
I would say get a Ikea crib/Target crib (cheap and excellent saftey ratings) and everything else can wait for a bit.
Even the carseat can wait b/c even if your LO comes at 30-34 weeks they probably will be in the NICU for at least a week.
Well first, congratulations! I'm 30 weeks pregnant and I haven't bought anything either except a few outfits because a lot of the big ticket items that are on my registry may be given to us at the babyshower. At least you have a bassinet that the baby will be sleeping in when it comes home. The crib can wait a little longer.
I would start looking at carseats, strollers, ect. because that's what you will be bringing the baby home in. Also, you might want to start buying stuff before you hit your third trimester and have no energy left to do it all.
You have time. Are you going to be having a baby shower? A lot of people don't buy anything significant until after that occurs. Even if you're not having a shower, you still have two or three months before you really need to start getting the basics in place. As long as you have a car seat, a safe place for the baby to sleep (crib, bassinet, or pack-n-play), and a few diapers and sleepers when the baby arrives, you'll be fine. You can buy what you need as you need it.
The cribs that take a long time to ship are usually the more expensive, special order ones. A lot of the less expensive cribs can be had immediately or within a couple of weeks from places like Babies R Us, Walmart, or Target. I did a special order crib for my first child and ordered it at 22 weeks pregnant. It was supposed to come in 12 weeks and got delayed and delayed...I didn't end up with a crib until DD was a month old. She slept in a pack-n-play until then. No big deal.
We had basically nothing until our shower when I was 33 weeks. We got the furniture and room ready at 35 weeks. It was a lot later than I imagined we would finish all these things, but we were completing other projects around the house (bathroom remodel and new carpet). Our furniture came from BRU and came in one week after ordering. You have plenty of time.
Thanks for the reassurance, ladies. Yes I am having a shower, I forgot to mention that!
But time out....
Whoah. Whoah whoah whoah. Problem. Yes, I am talking about the Uppa Baby Vista. I thought it was ok for baby to sleep in, since it comes with (well, doesn't come with, but you can buy) a stand to for the bassinet part...? If it's not, I need to know now so I can make other plans!
This is also a major reason why we aren't buying the crib yet: the UBV is so expensive that we can't afford it right now. I know that I want baby to sleep in a bassinet and I know that I want to use a pram/bassinet stroller (so baby can lie flat) at first, but the only separate bassinets I can find cost more than the (Graco Lauren) crib!
Looking at the manual for the vista, it doesn't explicitely say not to use for sleeping, but I agree with others that it shouldn't be used. Personally, I chose not to use a bassinet for several reasons: 1) there are no safety standards in place for bassinets (unlike cribs), 2) I did not want to deal with a transition from bassinet to crib, and 3) there were other things that I would rather spend my money on.
You really only need a carseat, a place for baby to sleep, and some diapers and clothing to start with. Everythig else (even changing table) can wait.
If money is a concern, you might want to reconsider the uppa baby vista and the bassinet stand. You can get a ton of other baby items for $800. There are cribs ad car seats available for $100 or less each.
Also, I don't want to scare you or anything, but don't wait until the very last minute to get the essentials. My water broke at 36 weeks (on labor day lol) and my DD was born the next day (i had a totally normal pregnancy and no complications, she just decided she was ready I think). Everyone always says that with your first you'll go late, but that was definety not the case for me.
I think you are fine! I'm 24 weeks and the ONLY reason I bought the stoller and furniture last weekend was to take advantage of 20% off discounts at REI for the stroller and BBB for the furniture. The furniture will take 8 weeks to arrive, but 2 of the 3 pieces were available now; I just asked them to hold them so they could deliver everything at the same time.
Get an inexpensive, yet highly rated, IKEA crib ($70-$140) and a carseat ($100) which is required for the hospital to release your baby if you are driving anywhere.
Read Baby Bargains to help sort out what you need and how to avoid spending money on non-necessities.
Also, make sure you tell EVERYONE you are expecting your first child. Sometimes people are happy to literally give (not sell) you stuff they just want to get rid of.
My DD slept in the Rock N Play for the first 5 months (about $60 full price) So I would say a crib isn't even necessary right away.
I love the UBV, but (trying not too judge) they are very spendy so I'm surprised that you are purchasing it if you are on a super tight budget.
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We had the BJCS bassinet and used it for our little one to sleep in for the first few months (my SIL now uses it for her baby at night). The only SIDS guidelines I could find that seemed relevant to the bassinet were that bumpers shouldn't be used, but I don't see how that is any different to some other bassinets you can buy that are specifically designed for nighttime use.
One SIDS guideline also mentions having a nice firm mattress and I found the BJCS bassinet one to be a bit flimsy, but if you wanted you could always have a new one cut for around $10.
As for your other concerns, of course purchases can be put off longer! You're only just over half way, you have plenty of time to buy things. I know what you mean about none of it feeling real, but you might find as you get closer to the due date you start getting excited and really want to buy more things and set up a space for your bub. Just enjoy your pregnancy for now and don't worry, the rest will come later.