- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Blended Families
Small vent - Kids not acknowledging
My step kids are 12 and 15. Since we now live long distance we sent the kids a gift for Easter. It was a cookie basket thing for both of them. They received it on Monday and we heard nothing about it. SD was on FB so I asked her if they got it and she was like "oh yeah we did." I told her they should probably call their dad and let him know.
Yesterday they did call, but neither mentioned the gift at all to DH. When he asked SS if he had gotten it, SS said oh, yeah, but I didn't know it was from you guys. He also, immediately asked where his Bday present was from us.
He said they were saving it for Easter, which means they are bringing it to their family party to share. I honestly don't think SS knew that the gift was from us. I hate that they have to now share the gift with their whole family, instead of having it for themselves.
I'm also sad that SD said NOTHING to DH. She has become very rude to DH and it makes me sad that she didn't even to say, oh hey dad, thanks for the cookies.
I'm just annoyed and needed to vent.
Warning
No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Small vent - Kids not acknowledging
I definitely put some blame on BM, she never really tries to make DH seem good. At Christmas our presents didn't get acknowledged either.
I think sharing is okay, but they weren't even allowed to eat one! I just don't get it. It was addressed to both kids and was for them to enjoy this week or whatever. Not even letting them have one is harsh, and these kids love these type of cookies which is why we bought them.
So what does your DH do when BM does this? Has he ever contacted BM directly? Can you get her explaining why she is keeping HIS presents to HIS children from them via email?
This is all part of the parental alienation issue and I would never allow that to happen.
When he has inquired about it in the past, we get one answer from BM that is different from the kids. She tries to say that the kids choose, but the kids say that BM and their stepdad chooses. It has happened before, where the kids were told one thing, so they did say it was okay, when in reality they weren't really told the truth. I almost think they were told it was for the family, not just for them and just thought they had to share it.
I agree with Llumine. I'd say probably call before you send next time. Call and say, hey kids theres a basket of cookies in the mail for you guys.. and call me when you get them
Maybe then the kids will be excited for something coming to them and will be on the look out and will know who sent it.
Great idea. I would try this next time!
My son doesn't acknowledge gifts unless I ask about it. It is partly a teenage thing, but still very annoying!
This was a good teaching opportunity for your DH. He should have said "Did you receive the cookies I sent to you? If so, you should thank me and wife. You always need to thank people for gifts!"
DH is also responsible for their manners...not just their mom.
We actually did let SD know last week that something would be coming Monday. She definitely knew it was from us. I don't know if she told SS, he wasn't around when we were talking.
We have always been on top of their manners, just didn't think to ask for a thank you for ourselves. Anytime they received gifts we had them write thank you's or tell the person thank you. BM isn't one to thank people, so I think she just doesn't see the need for the kids too.
I don't remember your backstory, but you mentioned that you now live long distance from the kids. Is it possible that some of the behavior could be a result of you guys now living long distance? Could the kids (particularly your SD based on the comment above) be upset about the move and this is their way of dealing with it? Like I said, I don't know your backstory, but it's just a thought.
Yup, thats the LAST thing I would send to them. My SD (17 next month) did that crap all the time - and now she gets nothing but a card. If you dont appreciate anything or acknowledge it - you get nothing but a card and the money that we would have used on a gift will go as a donation to somewhere (we always do the Animal Rescue League or Leukemia & Lymphoma Society). At least they will appreciate it.