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November 2011 Moms
No-Cry Sleep Solution vs. Sleep Lady
For those of you who have done/are interested in doing gentle sleep training, I'd LOVE to hear your thoughts/experiences about these two approaches.
Like a lot of you (from recent posts), we're also exhausted and needing to rethink our sleep routine. Thus far, we've been very wimpy about letting LO cry much - and unfortunately that means he gets nursed to sleep every.single.night. It's getting hard. My husband rocks him to sleep during the day, and this works sometimes at night, too - though I usually just nurse him b/c it's easier and DH works more than I do during the day so I'm up more. He wakes at least 1-2x/night; last week he was going through a phase where he woke 3-4+ times per night which was so tiring..but sounds normal. This morning he was "up for the day" at 4 - kept talking and smiling and would not go back down. I was so tired I could have cried. My own fault for not going to bed earlier myself!
So - LO is swaddled, nurses to sleep, is deposited (very) carefully into the Rock n' PLay around 7 - 7:30 p.m. I feel like we are lightyears away from putting him down in his crib and letting him fall asleep. I guess I should begin with unswaddling; he rolls over so this seems like the first hurdle before moving to the crib. Though - honestly I think it's time - he gets really mad when he wakes and can't move his arms and also seems to be filling out the RnP - he's 18 lbs and long. He has *never* fallen asleep drowsy but awake and I'm so afraid he never will. He also used to just hate being on his back. The RnP was a lifesaver but now I feel like it's going to be so hard to get out of it. My husband actually asked me the other day if they made extra-large Rock n' Play contraptions. 
We are not a CIO family and we're also not a cosleeping family; just isn't what's right for us. Have either of these books/methods been tried or worked well for you?
Thank you thank you thank you from another tired Nov. mama.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: No-Cry Sleep Solution vs. Sleep Lady
What did you elevate it with? Our daughter will only sleep in her bouncer at night and I'm ready to transition her to her crib but feel like she will need to sleep at an incline in order to sleep good.
We did this when DD had a really bad cold. We used a pillow and blankets under the matress until it was inclined enough. It worked really well for us.
BFP #2 March 2011, Baby Girl born November 2011!!!
I've read both of those books as well as several others because I'm slightly over the top when it comes to this kind of reading. It's been a long time since I read NCSS, but I found it minimally helpful (I might take it back out and skim it again now to see if there's anything I missed the first time). I remember it being a lot of try white noise, swaddling, different environment kind of stuff and yes, I think you should try all those things, but I don't necessarily think advice along the lines of "experiment a lot to find something that works" really needs a book. Good Night, Sleep Tight (the sleep lady book) has a solid plan to follow.
Whatever you do, co-sleep vs. crib vs. NCSS vs. Sleep Lady you can expect there to be night wakings at this age. Even those that sleep train will likely have to re-train after illnesses and teething. To some degree you have to accept that this is part of life with a baby, realize that it's normal and try not to get frustrated.
You're over thinking this a little bit. It's totally normal for a baby this age to not put them self to sleep. They learn with time and will be able to do it eventually. We taught DS using the sleep lady techniques (which she will tell you not to use until 6 months at a minimum) at 14 months and it was really, really easy because he was ready. If rocking and swaddling is what's working for you, keep doing it until it's not working any more. There is absolutely nothing wrong with nursing and rocking a 5 month old baby to sleep. That is absolutely the natural thing to do and if it works for you, there is no reason to second guess yourself.
~Working Mom~Breastfeeding Mom~Cloth Diapering Mom~BLW Mom~
Blog - No Longer on the DL ~ The Man Cave
Shawn and Larissa
LO #1 - Took 2 years and 2 IVFs ~ DX - severe MFI mild PCOS homozygous MTHFR (a1298c)
LO #2 - TTC 7 months, surprise spontaneous BFP!
DD started sleeping better when we moved her to her crib. However, she always liked laying flat on her back from day 1, so she didn't seem to mind being in the crib vs. the RNP.
I haven't read either of those books, but I think it sounds like you're a long way from doing any kind of formal sleep training. I would try getting rid of the swaddle first (maybe use a sleep sack or something like that?), then try moving to the crib.
FWIW, DH and I tried letting DD CIO the last week or so. It was horrible and felt so wrong to me. We didn't make any progress, and I was really starting to hate being a mom. All I wanted her to do was shut up and go to sleep. On Sunday, I decided I didn't want to continue with sleep training and I went back to rocking/nursing her to sleep. She is now sleeping better and I love the cuddle time with her. If she wakes up when I put her in her crib, she's usually okay if I hold her hands until she falls asleep. I feel like our bond is back and we are all happier now!
I guess my point is that I agree with Smilelari about continuing what works for you right now and not worrying about sleep training too much yet. I do think this would be a good time to wean from the swaddle and start working on moving to the crib.
ETA: Two more thoughts-
Even though we're not sleep training now, I don't pick up DD at the slightest whimper. Only if she's crying. Sometimes she will just lay there and babble, or fuss a little and go back to sleep.
Also, we tried elevating DD's crib mattress when she first moved to the crib because she had a cold at the time. Totally didn't work for us because she'd just wiggle her way sideways and down to the foot of the crib. But, it sounds like it has worked for others.
Thanks for your ideas, everyone. I should mention that the primary reason I'm concerned about him falling asleep by himself is because we might soon to have to have him daycare; they obviously won't have the time/resources to do 1:1 sleep soothing for his naps and I'm worried he'll never nap and be cranky and overtired all day. If it wasn't for the daycare/nap issue, I'd be fine nursing him to sleep as long as he needed it.
And yeah - his wakefulness isn't bad for his age, normal I know but still tiring. It's mostly been hard going back to work because I feel exhausted before I even get there. I think we are going to try unswaddling next week since I have a couple of days off, and go from there...
I had the same issues. We were having him sleep next to us in the RNP and every little movement would wake me up and I would take him into bed with us. Then I decieded that he was going to sleep in his crib. What I do is around 8pm I rock him to sleep after feeding him and then put him on his belly in his crib. He is over 4 mths old and can roll himself over so it is safe to put him on his belly without risk of SIDS. He does not like sleeping on his back.. Then if I start hearing him cry on the monitor I give him 5 or so minutes and most the time he goes back to sleep. I have started to recognize the difference between sleepy cry and "I am awake and come and get me cry!" It isn't quite the CIO method, but a slight variation. Even if you hear LO crying you can go in and soothe him in the crib, but don't pick him up. Sometimes if I lay him down and he is squirming a bit, I put my hand on his back until he settles down and his breathing evens out.
Good luck!! It is hard...