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ntr- 2nd wedding etiquette?

carolyn02carolyn02 member
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
Hey ladies, I'm mostly a lurker here, but I need help.  My best friend is getting married for the second time and has asked me to be her matron of honor (for the 2nd time).  First marriage for her fiance.  Are there still bachelorette parties for a 2nd wedding? I hosted the b party for her first marriage, and omg... I don't think I can handle that amount of alcohol and debauchery again! (Plus I'm now married, with an 18 mo old, work full time, and live 8 hrs away from her!)  Thoughts? 
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Re: ntr- 2nd wedding etiquette?

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    rosesandpeoniesrosesandpeonies member

    maybe you could do some sort of spa day or girls day out.  I don't think you have to go crazy with the whole alcohol going out partying thing.  I didn't even do that the first time around.

    Keep it a simple thing during the day....that is what I would do.

     

    DD (8/12/09), DD (2/8/11)
    BFP 12/16/14| EDD 8/19/15 |MMC 1/15/15 (9 weeks 1 day)
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    JaZavitzJaZavitz
    my siser in law just got married for a second time and it was her fiance's first wedding. everything was done as big as with her first wedding. but think it depends on the bride and groom and what they want
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    +SMACE++SMACE+ member

    In the past, generally all that was done was a quiet and small ceremony for 2nd weddings. 

    Fast forward to everyone creating their own etiquette rules, second weddings can have as much fanfare as first weddings.

    I would talk to your friend and ask her what her expectations are. if you are unable to uphold them, due to children/time/money/ etc then explaim that to her. Either you can politely decline while expressing excitement for her upcoming nuptials OR she'll reconsider what she wants for pre-wedding festivities. 

    Also, even if this was a first wedding all you're "supposed" to do as a MOH is stand up for her during the wedding, but let's face it, most brides don't agree.

    Good luck!! 

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    MrsMommyQMrsMommyQ member

    Maybe I'm missing something, but I'd ask her what she wants. If she wants a crazy night out and you can't (or don't really want to) do that, then maybe just go for part of the night?

    The girls day sounds like a great idea to me, but hopefully that's what she has in mind.

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    hmp1hmp1 member
    I told my MOH that I didn't want to go bar hopping for my bachelorette party. We went to a stripper class (had a pole and everything) and then a low key dinner with wine. It was such a good time, we still talk about it. And OMG my thighs hurt the next day.

    James Sawyer 12.3.10
    Leo Richard 9.20.12 
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    thedashthedash member
    Tell her you were thinking of a spa afternoon,  group dance lesson, etc and see what she thinks. I would probably just do one pre-wedding event rather than a separate shower and b party. It depends on how formal and traditional the rest of her wedding is going to be though. 
    DS: 2/17/11          DD: 9/4/13
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