How do I go about this?

noffsinger · March 2012

My husband and I watch a womans two children on a regular basis at least every weekend if not more. The mother and the two fathers are not exactly the best at showing good examples to the children. The live with their mother and occasionally see their individual fathers. Their mother drinks, smokes, and does marijuana. She also has a habit of bringing home men to sleep with. We don't want the children getting lost in the CPS system and a lawyer to get custody of them will cost $200/per hour/per child, which we cannot afford. We can't have children and love these two very much, we do our best to show good, healthy, examples. The oldest, a boy age 9, recently asked my husband about a sex toy he found in his mom's room, and mentioned a cousin at his dad's house showed him porn. What are your suggestions on how to respond? Also, his sister is 6, when should I talk to her about things. I worry about what choices they may make when they are older, I also worry about their current safety. Any suggestions? Hopefully this is clear enough.

J&A2008 · March 2012

-auntie-:

Why on earth do you think you'd be awarded custody of some other family's children? It's not how this works.

Not sure anything her rises to the level of abuse or even neglect- if the cousin who shared the porn is a minor CPS isn't going to get excited. Ditto sex toys unless mom is using them on the kids.

Drug use could be enough to get CPS involved in most areas unless they're overloaded.

And, auntie, babysitters or other caretakers who regularly see the children and know them are frequently asked to take them in if they have to be removed from the parents' home. It's in the best interest of the children that they have the stability of being with someone they know.

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