Might end up being one and done ::sad face::

hepcats · March 2012

So DH asked me over the weekend if I'd be terribly upset/disappointed if we didn't have any more kids. I told him the truth: I would be disappointed but not upset since we at least have the one. I told him what I thought all the pluses were to having a second one and that there seemed to be far fewer minuses but said I'd not bring up the subject for awhile.

I'm sad. I've been jelly of all the recent pregnancies on the board, mostly because I loved being pregnant, but I know that it's not the right time yet, even if DH were on board. I just wish that he was. *le sigh*

Now say some nice things to make me feel better. GO!

chloephoebecali · March 2012

Maybe he just needs some more time? Your DS is still so young. DH LOVES having a 2.5 year old. He is just so happy and is now bugging me for another LO to keep them coming. It gets more fun/easy as they get older (in most ways), so maybe in another year he will feel different.

cassoppea · March 2012

I'm sorry But I agree with PP - I think it takes guys a lot more time to warm up to the idea. I wouldn't count him out yet.

Your LO is so stinkin' cute, I'm not sure how he could resist another one!

I'm sure my post did not help with this at all - sorry about that

magnoliablossom00 · March 2012

I'm sorry that you're feeling kind of down. On the bright side, if you only have one, think of all the ways you can spoil him! Stick out tongue

PurdueMama14 · March 2012

*Hugs* It would be a shame for a couple that made a ridiculously adorable baby to not continue to populate the world with more ridiculously adorable babies.

In all seriousness though, I agree with pp...he might change his mind down the road.

LowTalker23 · March 2012

PurdueMama14:
*Hugs* It would be a shame for a couple that made a ridiculously adorable baby to not continue to populate the world with more ridiculously adorable babies.

True dat.

PurdueMama14:
In all seriousness though, I agree with pp...he might change his mind down the road.

Double true.

maddiemoon43 · March 2012

I agree it's too soon to worry he will feel this way forever. I would leave it alone for a bit (I know with my DH bringing something up too soon would just cause him to push more against it) and see how he feels down the road.

Marcilene1 · March 2012

chloephoebecali:
Maybe he just needs some more time? Your DS is still so young. DH LOVES having a 2.5 year old. He is just so happy and is now bugging me for another LO to keep them coming. It gets more fun/easy as they get older (in most ways), so maybe in another year he will feel different.

This. In all honesty, we got pregnant REALLY soon after Lucy was born (way before she was mobile and tougher to wrangle lol). If we hadn't gotten pregnant then, I think my DH would have the same attitude as yours right now. However, I do think that in a year or two he would of thought differently. I'd be willing to bet that the same is true for your husband.

MrsCodeMonkey · March 2012

I'm in the same boat. I told DH I'm keeping the baby gear for a few years just in case. I'd like to revisit the topic and maybe he'll change his mind. Originally, I had wanted just one also, but after getting pregnant I started wanting two. Hormones are so powerful! Must obey! Must bring more cuteness into the world! Why don't men understand? Haha!

gymnst1013 · March 2012

Aw, I'm sorry Hep

I agree with the girls though. He might very well change his mind once M is a little older!

kimbo1216 · March 2012

You are not only awesome but awesomly hilarious! No matter how many kiddos you have, I hope they get your sense of humour!

RClaffee · March 2012

Maybe he just needs the time to think about what you said about the plusses and minuses. When I wanted a baby and DH said he wasn't ready yet, it was really hard because I kept harping on it, but about a month after I laid off, he said he was ready. Maybe your DH needs time. Good luck to you both. That is a really tough place to be.

ShangriLaRose · March 2012

Awww. I bet you he'll come around. it's probably just too soon for him to wrap his head around it.

Go shopping! ;-D It always makes me feel better! lol

Spartanmama722 · March 2012

I totally agree with everyone else. I bet he'll change his mind down the road when M is older! Don't worry yet!

imoverit · March 2012

He may be saying this now but theres definitely time for him to come around. Ice cream always makes me feel better. Do you have some lying around?

Syncronicity09 · March 2012

I agree with all the pp's. MH said the same, I responded "ok, we'll talk about it at a later date" and we left it at that. Before Ash he said he didn't think he wanted kids...before we got married he said he wasn't sure he wanted to get married again (he's divorced). I just have to be patient and wait for him to come around.

The baby phase is hard for him, but he has said many times he can't wait until he can talk and interact more. I have no doubt he will come around when he has a little buddy to play legos with!

hepcats · March 2012

@cassoppea: It's all your fault! Stick out tongue No please, don't feel bad. It's not your fault.

@PurdueMama: Embarrassed

@chrismo: OMG that new pic of Lucy is adorbs!

@ShangriLaRose: I did last weekend! lol I spent a fuuuckton lol

@imoverit: I do! Breyers natural coffee ice cream. Mmmmmmm

@everyoneelse: thank you guys so much. It's helped.

kaitylin · March 2012

We sort of have the same situation. DH always wanted 3. I was sure I would only want one. Now that DD is here I can't stand the idea of never having a newborn again or being pregnant but DH has totally switched to the one and done ship (Guess I oversold the one and done benefits before we got married...oops) I'm in no way ready now to have another LO - still don't have the PPA totally under control and not ready to face it at its worst yet (maybe never...) but I hope DH comes around so I at least have the option down the line. I think he will once DD is older and maybe I will be ready too...

Im sure your DH will come around! My sister and her DH thought they were one and done after their first was born (her DH was one of ten and did not want a big family) and they were overwhelmed with just 1. Well, guess what- now they have 4. My sister desperately wanted to adopt another after they adopted her DD3 and her DH said no way but a couple months later came up to her out of the blue and said he wanted to adopt another! Your DH may just need time and who knows! Plus, you do make uber cute babies!

mesr · March 2012

my dh took a long time to come around to having a second (considering that he didn't even want kids, having two was a big leap for him). but once dd1 got to be more fun, he was enthusiastic about having a second kid.

jkchs2003 · March 2012

ShangriLaRose:

Awww. I bet you he'll come around. it's probably just too soon for him to wrap his head around it.

Go shopping! ;-D It always makes me feel better! lol

I agree

MammaBear81 · March 2012

I know I'm no where near "one and done" but I'm here to commiserate with you... I think this LO will be our last, and seeing everyone that is joining the 2 under 2 club makes it even harder to accept. Knowing that we are done before we feel that our family is "complete" makes me feel like I've failed in some way.

On the bright side, you still have time! Your DH might come around, you don't HAVE to be 2 under 2.... and if you are one and done think of all the awesome things the three of you can do together! Your LO can do all the activities he wants to do, planning trips is easier, and you can have your body back... I haven't owned my body for the last 7 years LOL!

DramaMama06 · March 2012

aw hep! i'm sure, as pp said, he will change his mind as LO grows up. if not drug him

the world needs more of your cute babes!!!

Marcilene1 · March 2012

hepcats:

@cassoppea: It's all your fault! No please, don't feel bad. It's not your fault.

@PurdueMama:

@chrismo: OMG that new pic of Lucy is adorbs!

@ShangriLaRose: I did last weekend! lol I spent a fuuuckton lol

@imoverit: I do! Breyers natural coffee ice cream. Mmmmmmm

@everyoneelse: thank you guys so much. It's helped.

Thanks lady!

The_Birds_04 · March 2012

My DH has flat out sad he will never want another. It hurts because I would love to have as many as possible. I just hope time will change his mind. No help for your problem, just know your not alone.

pammeelala · March 2012

You could always tamper with your BC, and if you admit it, you would have at least one other bumpie to commiserate with...

But really, give him time. You are not too old (yet) to take some time.

In the mean time, RETAIL THERAPY

Brooklyn2577 · March 2012

WHen DS1 was about a year old DH said no more. (We were not getting along at all either). Then about a year and a half after that we decided together to go for DS2. So you never know!

Enjoy the time with DS. It's awesome watching them become little people without having to chase around another baby.