Grad school with a newborn? Anyone work/school with new baby?

sunshine715 · March 2012

OK, I am due on 8/9. All of my other children have been early (not saying this one will, but we'll see).

I have a one-time opportunity to take an assistantship in the fall (starting 8/20) where I was accepted into an M.A. program. I had planned on attending and worked my butt off for this for the past year - not planning on having a fourth baby. But life happens - surprise! To keep the assistantship (no more than 10-15 hours per week, mostly working from home), I have to take 2 courses as well. The courses are one evening per week for three hours, and I have the option to take only 1 course and 1 independent study, because of my circumstances.

Has anyone attempted grad school or work or anything with this young of a baby? What did you do, how did you manage? I'm trying to balance what I really really want for myself, knowing that it's going to be really really exhausting ... with my brain telling me that it's going to be too much. I know if I don't take it now, it will be given to someone else and I can't get the funding back later on.

WWYD? Thanks in advance

annibes · March 2012

Yes- though it was my first baby. I started my grad program when he was 3 weeks old. I was so lucky- the women's resource center was in the next building over, so I had a pumping room really close by.

DH's job allowed him to be home during the day when I was at school, so we were able to stagger our schedules to avoid daycare. This was an enormous plus.

As for getting work done, I turned it into a job. I got up super early (430) to pump and start studying everyday. That way I was studying while baby was sleeping and I didn't feel like I was missing time with him.

It was tough, but worth it. In fact, we are ttc and I am starting a phd program in the fall- so the experience did not scar me enough to keep me from going back and planning for more babies.

Classmates and profs always made comments about how they didn't know how I did it and it was amazing- but it didn't feel like a huge task at the time- it was what it was. I'm pretty sure anyone with the drive can get through it- you just have to be crazy enough to get started! Good luck!!

warriormomerin · March 2012

I was in grad school when my youngest was an infant. I didn't work during that time, but my personal life was falling apart and I was raising two kids on my own. It was hard, but not impossible.

I actually think that the younger the child, the easier it is to a certain extent. It started to get much harder to get everything done once DS became mobile and needed constant entertainment. Those first months when all he did was eat and sleep were pretty easy.

My advice is to find a routine that works and stick with it as much as you can. The nights that I wasn't in a class, my kids were fed, bathed and in bed no later than 7:30. My work was done from 7:30-11:30 p.m. Most of my time during the day was dedicated to the kids and housekeeping, but I would sometimes manage a few hours of homework during the day while DD was in school and DS was napping.

I often felt guilty that I would have to read or do homework instead of play with the kids, but I kept reminding myself that I was setting a good example and showing them how important an education is.

Good luck!

tarat3232 · March 2012

You can certainly do the classwork. My only concern would be making sure you have adequate childcare for a newborn. If you have an assistantship that is teaching and not research, you will have at least 5 and as many as 10 face to face hours a week with students. If the semester starts the 3rd or 4th week of August that leaves you with a 2/3 week old who will have to be with someone else for those hours. As well as the 2 courses which may be 2-2 1/2 hours each. If you can work that out, then it is doable.

I will say that starting grad school is a total shock to some people's system. I think having a family helps that, but it can be very overwhelming.

asyph107 · March 2012

It is a lot, but worth it most of the time. I am going for my masters right now, was when I was PG with number 2 and now still doing it that he is little. I wont graduate until the end of 2013. I work full time, go to grad school, and take care of the boys when I am home. We have an awesome nanny, and when DH is home before 7am and after 7pm he is somewhat helpful.

SweetBaby2004 · March 2012

I worked and started grad school when DD#1 was 2 and DS was 6 months old. It was hard but I am glad I got it done when they were small. DH is a SAHD so that helped in that we didn't have daycare and there were nights when I barely saw them or had assignments to finish and couldn't play. It was worth it though!

Kadyra · March 2012

I had DS when I was a resident, and I had to go back to work when he was 6 weeks old. I worked 80-90 hours a week at the time. He went to daycare during the day when he was 8 weeks (MIL was there until then and took care of him). Sometimes he was asleep by the time I got home. I pumped as often as possible and DH was extremely understanding and helpful. It was hard, but we did it. This time around, I only work 40 hours and DH is a SAHD instead of working full time. So it should be a lot different. Anyway, if it's a great opportunity, go for it. Your kids will still love you-- and it will only make them prouder of your accomplishment.

PhDMomma · March 2012

Yes, I'm doing it right now. I started my doctorate Fall 2011, and LO was supposed to be a finals week baby, but he had other plans and came around Halloween. That said, in order to keep my funding and finish my courses (I was taking 3), I only took 1 week off (yes, I know that was insane). That said, I just did the essentials and let my research slack a bit. So, that I could finish my courses without taking extensions (which were important for me to keep my research funding).

It can be done. But it will be insane. Adequate childcare is a large issue. LO goes to daycare 5 days a week, and I more or less treat my courses and research hours like a job. That said, if I don't get everything done during the "working day" then I often stay up late at night doing it. It's not easy, but in the end I hope that it all will be worth it.

Good luck

trackchik6 · March 2012

I went to law school with a baby. we had full time daycare during that time.

simplaw215 · March 2012

I'm a little late to the party but I am in my last year of law school and my daughter is turning 1 in a month or so. She was born during finals of my 2L year and I was able to spend the summer home with her and then return to school in the fall. For me, I have enjoyed starting my family in school because of the flexibility. This semester I have been able to schedule my classes for only two days out of the week, so that I can be home with my daughter on the other days. It is definitely doable but I would recommend finding childcare that you are comfortable with. My mother in law watches DD while I am at school. The peace of mind that I have from that arrangement has been crucial in making this year successful. HTH and good luck with whatever you decide!

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Grad school with a newborn? Anyone work/school with new baby?

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