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I found out last night that I am a homewrecker

socloudy99socloudy99 member
in Blended Families

I am starting to think BM#2 has a real mental problem. You can lie to people who were not around but you can't lie to DH and I about the past. We lived it with you. I think she believes her own lies.

Background:

BM#1 has SD and SS. BM#2 has SD and SD. BM#1 and BM#2 hate each other and always compair which kids are better.

Recently:

SS (BM#1s) and SD (BM#2s) were talking and SD told SS that DH never wanted him and her mom told her so.

The funny part is DH wasn't trying to have any of his kids. They were idiots being sloppy with there birth control. He loves them more then the world and couldn't imagine life without them but he wasn't trying to make them.

So DH calls BM#2 b/c he is mad.

BM#2 Well socloudy is the reason we got divorced.

DH No she isn't. Your repeative cheating is why we got divorced.

BM#2 No you were seeing socloudy.

DH No I didn't even have her phone number till after the second time you cheated so how would I be seeing her.

BM#2 No you guys were together.

- She KNOWS this isn't true. I had only meet DH two times before the seperate with her at a mutual friends party. We had never said more then two words to each other. It is so funny how she remembers it. Of course she has told the girls this too. It is so weird that I never realized her two boyfriends had nothing to do with them seperating then DH and I slowly talking and then dating when she moved in with her boyfriend. So I will now also be known as HW.

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Re: I found out last night that I am a homewrecker

  • CurlyQ284CurlyQ284 member
    Everything is ok with BM now but DH ended the marriage because of her cheating and she blamed him saying he was looking for a reason to leave. She was trying to get back with him when we started dating and then she blamed his girlfriend (im not sure if she knows that was me.or not) for getting in the way. Its weird how people justify things.
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  • HopeforthebestHopeforthebest member

    Don't you guys all know...it's ALWAYS somebody else's fault. NEVER their own fault or even a 50/50 split of blame.

    It sucks that any grown adult would tell a child anything about the adult issues that lead to divorce, but it tends to be a theme among a lot of divorced people. Yet another reason I sometimes think people in general should have to take classes before being able to have children. Too many people are selfish and can not put the child 1st and their well being 1st, ahead of their own insecurities and bitter petty differences.

     

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  • kali55kali55 member
    imageHopeforthebest:

    Don't you guys all know...it's ALWAYS somebody else's fault. NEVER their own fault or even a 50/50 split of blame.

    It sucks that any grown adult would tell a child anything about the adult issues that lead to divorce, but it tends to be a theme among a lot of divorced people. Yet another reason I sometimes think people in general should have to take classes before being able to have children. Too many people are selfish and can not put the child 1st and their well being 1st, ahead of their own insecurities and bitter petty differences.

     

    Yes 



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  • CFjo2010CFjo2010 member

    Wow. I can't believe a mother would tell her child that. Even if it were true, why would anyone want to poison their child against the other parent in that way?! I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. That is such crap. 

    BM has claimed that I'm the reason she and my husband broke up. We started dating 3 years after they broke up, but since we knew each other through our best friends we "obviously" must have been fooling around long before we became "public". 4 years later she still believes that and still tells everyone that is what happened. Thankfully she's never said it to K, at least not that we know of. It seems like some people will do and spin anything to make it appear that they've been wronged and are the victim. 

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  • xmaryrickxxmaryrickx member
    De
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  • socloudy99socloudy99 member

    Well at least I am not alone. Maybe we should start the fake homewreckers union to protect ourselves.

    Just to further explain:

    My DH wasn't the perfect H and contributed to the marriage falling apart before she cheated. He does a lot of things differently in our marriage then his 1st.

    BM#2 however learned nothing since she thinks she did nothing wrong. She is now remarried. She is a month away from the point in her 1st marriage that she started cheating. Hopefully she doesn't repeat the same mistake.

    BM#2 also told SDs that BM#1 was a stripper. This is true the was before SD and SS were born. They all go to school together. SD already almost said something in school when SS made her mad. I know she will slip one day. These are things they don't need to know till they are adults. BM#2 sure forgot about her 3 abortions when she was story-telling. It's funny how that missed the cut.

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  • RhennaRhenna
    People come up with the craziest things around break ups.  I'm a wedding photographer and my ExMIL told BF that she was following my blog and that all of the pictures I was taking were of the grooms/groomsmen and that I was obsessed with other men and must have been cheating on him.  I LMFAO on that one.  People are nuts.
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  • FormerlyAKFormerlyAK
    imagejobalchak:

    Wow. I can't believe a mother would tell her child that. Even if it were true, why would anyone want to poison their child against the other parent in that way?!

    I totally agree.

    My ex-h was cheating on me with his now live-in girlfriend, but I would NEVER tell ds that is why we aren't together anymore. All ds needs to know as our child is that we were married, we wanted to have a baby and were lucky to have him and we both still love him even though we decided we shouldn't be married anymore.

    I hate when people put the innocent kid in the middle like that.

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  • CFjo2010CFjo2010 member
    imagesocloudy99:

    BM#2 also told SDs that BM#1 was a stripper. This is true the was before SD and SS were born. They all go to school together. SD already almost said something in school when SS made her mad. I know she will slip one day. These are things they don't need to know till they are adults. BM#2 sure forgot about her 3 abortions when she was story-telling. It's funny how that missed the cut.

    Whoa.  Let me start off by saying that I think it's awesome that all the kids go to school together.  If only BM2 weren't poisoning her children and airing out everyone's dirty laundry, those kids would probably be able to have great relationships with each other.  Kids do not need to know about the skeletons in their parents' closets. 

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  • equinechicequinechic member
    :coming out of lurking:Just last summer I also found out that apparently I was a homewrecker too. SD was 12 at the time and asked to know what had happened. We felt she was mature enough so we told her the truth b/c that is all she deserves in our opinion. So we explain (in an appropriate amount of detail) that while Dad was working 2 full time jobs (he was 20 when she was born) to support herself, her mother, and her mother's first D (a 2y-o). When SD was about 2mo old, Dad came home to find a "friend of mommy's" sitting on the couch holding his daughter...at 7am (there were other instances too) resulting in a divorce. Fast forwarding to our convo with SD, she then responds, "oh, mom told us (herself and old sister DH raised as his own) you left us for [Equinechic]. My eyes almost bugged out of my head. I calmly asked her when her little sister's birthday is. To which she responded sometime in Oct. And I explained to her that the first time I ever met her Dad was the end of Sept (that same year). After a minute of watching the gears going I said, yes, your Mother was 8 pregnant with another man's child when I met your dad. Again processing...At this age, she is putting all of the crap her mother has put. All of us through together...and its almost like sweat revenge.:return to lurking:
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  • +j+k++j+k+

    This is so common. 

    SD's mom says all kinds of crap too. It's not even worth arguing with. SD - even tho she is much like her mother - has finally seen thru it all and has realized all these years that her mother has lied to her about DH.  SD no longer has had any real relationship with her mom for an entire year now.

    Honestly, this is not worth getting worked up over or explaining to anyone. You owe no one an explanation.  Help your kids do the math and don't put them in the middle as much as you can, but other than that - do not give this woman the attention she's trying to stir up.

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