Did you feel pressured

AmandaP678 · March 2012

BF or FF?

swimiz500 · March 2012

Yes. I FF, and knew I would FF. Now, I never got BM (or engorged, or any of those things), so it is a moot point, but yeah, I felt like people judged me for sure because I wasn't BFing. Even though I completely think it is my right to choose, people often made me feel so uncomfortable that I just said "yeah, I never got BM" instead of telling the whole truth. Even my ILs really harassed me about it, as if it were their business.

IlliniQT · March 2012

Yes, I felt pressure to BF, but the pressure was competely self imposed. I looooved EBF, it was the highlight of my days and nights once I got the hang out it. And it was really, really hard to start supplementing LO when I went back to work. I spent many bottle feedings with him crying. And even now, as my supply continues to drop I feel sad about it, but I know he's eating, and he's happy and healthy.

I EP now, it was soooo much work to nurse him and then go make a bottle, and then he'd fight the bottle because he wanted the boob back. I know I made the right decision, but I definitely miss nursing him.

KtGirl88 · March 2012

My mother breastfed my sister until 1 year and I was BF until about 8 months but I don't think she ever "pressured" me. I felt a lot of pressure from A LOT of people to FF when marina was a lower percentile of weight for a couple months but it was just an adjustment period. No formula and she is chunking up quite nicely ;o)

jmo866 · March 2012

I have to say I felt pressured to FF from my mom and MIL, especially since my milk was way late, and even thought the hospital pedi said it was fine, my mom (who never shows emotion mind you) was crying and all upset because I was starving the baby, and why wouldn't I just give him a bottle? It was heart wrenching and made me feel like crap, literally 5 days in, welcome to being a FTM. However, I am glad I stuck with it, because 7.5 months later I am still very happy with my choice to BF, even though he has no problems taking formula and I have no problems giving it on occasion.

Cindilouwho24 · March 2012

Nope. I BF for as long as I could and then switched. No pressure, I made all the decisions.

jlsimon56 · March 2012

My MIL has said that BFing past 1 year is "gross" so I'm sure I'll get pressure to FF once LO gets closer to 1....all the more reason to BF her as long as possible, ha!

I think I put more pressure on myself than anyone else though, really. I am a twin and my mom BFed both of us. If she could do that....I could BF a measly singleton, right?

ohdrama09 · March 2012

There was pressure, but it was NBD. It's the norm in my family. It would have been weird for us to FF.

My family of pro BF/LLL leaders/"nipple nazi" family didn't take the supplementing well at first. They didn't believe that my milk never came in the way it was supposed to. One week at my grandparents' beach house and they were believers we NEEDED to supplement. We use about 60/40 donor milk/what milk I can supply now.

starz57182 · March 2012

I pressured myself, because I really really wanted to BF. I did, and it didn't work out that well, and I probably should have stopped sooner but I didn't. My choice. I had plenty of people supporting me to switch when it came to that point, and plenty of people supporting me to keep trying while I had problems. They were all the same people, by the way

Pressure from anyone else? Not really. People made comments though, both when breast feeding and when I switched. When I was pregnant and planning to BF, I had several girls tell me it was gross and they would never try it and they were definitely going to do formula and tell me all the reasons why. Then when I switched, I had people tell me all the great reasons to BF and why they would never FF. I never listened to anyone and none of the comments swayed me in any way.

But as someone who's been on both sides, I have to say that you just can't win. No matter what you do, people are talking and judging. Sigh.

ohdrama09 · March 2012

starz57182:
I pressured myself, because I really really wanted to BF. I did, and it didn't work out that well, and I probably should have stopped sooner but I didn't. My choice. I had plenty of people supporting me to switch when it came to that point, and plenty of people supporting me to keep trying while I had problems. They were all the same people, by the way
Pressure from anyone else? Not really. People made comments though, both when breast feeding and when I switched. When I was pregnant and planning to BF, I had several girls tell me it was gross and they would never try it and they were definitely going to do formula and tell me all the reasons why. Then when I switched, I had people tell me all the great reasons to BF and why they would never FF. I never listened to anyone and none of the comments swayed me in any way.
But as someone who's been on both sides, I have to say that you just can't win. No matter what you do, people are talking and judging. Sigh.

Truth. It sucks.

Mason&Mama · March 2012

I did everything I could to BF as long as I could. My Ex's family made many passive aggressive comments about Mason's high-maintenance personality having to do with BF. It pissed me off so much. It made me doubt my parenting. They also compared him to his FF cousin (who SSTN from birth) all the time. Well I am sorry if that barely 18 year old mother was so much better than me to FF. I guess I was a bad mom. They were so happy when I told them I had to start supplementing around Christmas.

AmandaP678 · March 2012

jlsimon56:
My MIL has said that BFing past 1 year is "gross" so I'm sure I'll get pressure to FF once LO gets closer to 1....all the more reason to BF her as long as possible, ha!
I think I put more pressure on myself than anyone else though, really. I am a twin and my mom BFed both of us. If she could do that....I could BF a measly singleton, right?

My MIL flat out told me I was a bad my for BF and that it wasn't working for Timmy! She fought me tooth and nail to ff, needles to say that wasn't a fight I was going to lose. She made me that much more determined to bf

AsOctoberFalls · March 2012

I was under tons of pressure to BF, mostly from my mom. She still makes comments about it even now. It sucks because I really want my mom's approval. But no one is as hard on me as I am on myself. My failure at BF is a huge source of sorrow and regret.

Stellar1 · March 2012

No not really. I always knew I would breastfeed both of my children. I nursed and supplemented my dd and we stopped nursing at 15 months. I am still bf'ing my 8 month old and he gets supplemented because I am a teacher so I'm not with him all the time. I have gotten a few comments on how long am I going to continue nursing. Bothers me a little but I will continue nursing for as long as my DS and I are still happy. My dh totally supports me and that is all that really matters.

LnR70707 · March 2012

I put pressure on myself. I had a very hard time getting my supply up. After all the IF stuff I went through and the high risk pregnancy it just felt like one more failure.

katiewhompus · March 2012

I didn't until I made the commitment to ebf. Then I got all kinds of shiit about fow ff was healthier, I was being selfish, I was hurting my daughter's growth, blah blah

FutureMrsWittig · March 2012

I BF, always planned to. But my MIL overheard me one time saying that if I had to supplement or just go with formula that I wouldn't fight it. She got SOOOO mad. Said that there was NO REASON that I wouldn't be able to breast feed. She jumped me again when my supply dipped and I went out and bought some formula just in case (never even used it). B!tch, give me a break...

dairygirl19 · March 2012

Honestly, no.

I don't know a soul in real life that cares one way or the other. Where I live, the people I associate with will discuss but I've never felt attacked over my choices one way or the other. Both are pretty well supported. I have friends that have done all sorts of combinations so they get it.

My Mom ff me. My MIL bf'd six kids. Neither have ever said a word. I think the only thing my Mom ever said was, "EPing is a lot of work." She didn't say it in a bad way, just more commenting. And yeah, it is.

I didn't pressure myself either. When pregnant that was the one thing I said I wouldn't do to myself and I held true.

I EPd for 5 months and told myself when it got to the point of stressing me out I'd move on. I started having supply issues and decided I wasn't going to "waste" time pumping and "waste" money on formula together. It had to be one or the other.

I moved onto formula right after Christmas. We're all here and fine!

chynadiva · March 2012

Ooooh yes, at the beginning & sometimes am still judge by my mom because I chose to EBF & pump. When DD was born and being a FTM I had latching issues and DD really laserated me. It was painful, but I remained strong continued to BF. I did for like 2 -3days combined FF with BF, only until I got better. My mom would say I was starving her, blah. blah! I remember would cry everyday because I had so bad. Then she started hounding me about whenI was gonna introduce solids, because BM isn't enough. I will never regret my decision to EBF and I introduced DD to solids at 6 months. It's my child and I will do what I think is right for her. Today my DD is big, beautiful, healthy and has only gotten sick once, at 2 months. No complaints here

jesstellina · March 2012

I have EBF/pumped at work and never felt pressured. I always knew I would BF and didn't even consider formula feeding. My mom, sis, and SIL's have breastfed, so it's just the norm in my family and no one gave it a second thought. In DH's family most of the babies have been formula fed. I don't talk to the FF'ers (not because of that - just not close to them/don't see them), but the older ladies like his aunts are strangely awed at how well breastfeeding has worked for us. They saw how healthy and chubby she was around Christmas and were like "Wow! There must be something in that milk that's really working for her!"

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