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Blended Families
BF won't work with us, 4 years is too long
My son's father has half custody (DS is with him about 40% of the time, enough to really cause problems) For 4 years he has tried to get full custody, made false claims about abuse and/or neglect (he picks different stories as it suits him) he's called the police, I've been investigated by CPS twice, just on and on. We have spend $16,000 in the last 4 years with legal fees, psychological evaluations, etc. All I want is peace, to work together to raise our son. I can't stand the man but I can be civil, I can work with him.
Last year we had psychological evaluation (myself, DH, my ex, his wife and our son) The psychiatrist said that dad won't work with me, and when he does deal with me it is always accusatory, etc. He recommended co-parenting counseling and weekly counseling for our son. I thought this was great. Maybe dad can learn to work with me better, and we can resolve these issues to better raise our son. I also thought that having my son in counseling would make the mental abuse stop (I call it abuse to brainwash a child, tell him lies, make him lie, etc. Apparently the court doesn't.) But my thought was, either the mental abuse would stop, or I would finally have definitive proof against my ex and get full custody. Either way, my son would be freed from the hell he's been forced to live.
Problem is, it's been a year now. The trial date keeps getting pushed back and now we don't go until May. Is there anything I can do to move some things along? Counseling or something? Do I have any options here or do I have to wait for a court date (which seems to resolve nothing. Like I finally got child support a year ago but he rarely pays on time and skipped 2 months and still no one has done anything about it)
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Re: BF won't work with us, 4 years is too long
do you have a court order? from everything I have read on this board the more detailed the CO the better. get into specific dates and times. also, agree to only communicate in writing, via text or e-mail so you have documentation. I would make sure your son is still in counseling so he has a "neutral advocate" in the courtroom.
unfortunately I don't think your BF is going anywhere, seems like you are open and he is not. how frustrating. good luck with your court date
Thanks. It's so frustrating. And every time we add more details to the custody agreement, my ex gives me 10 more issues that need to be adjusted.
I hate that I have to wait yet again. But I have a running list of the things I need the court to handle for us. And most of all I want my son in counseling and I want co-parenting counseling. I don't have much hope for co-parenting but I have tried everything else, and at least this way the court will be able to see that I AM trying. And my son really does need his own advocate. The court doesn't listen to me and I get it, lots of parents go in a lie to get what they want. So having an unbiased 3rd party seems like the only way.