Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
ctbride08
member
Re: }i{ Healthy Living Check-In }i{
The warmer weather has been awesome for getting myself moving. I've gone on walks everyday this week, even if just a short one after lunch.
As for eating, I'm doing my best to only stock healthy things in my desk at work, but I have been eating so damn much lately that I don't know that it matters how healthy the stuff is!
QOTD: Nope. But I'd definitely be interested in a exercise/get healthy one!
Maybe I don't have a heightened sense of smell, but I've never smelled any vagina on my pants. -- TSD
Bloggity Blog - You know you want to...
We ate out EVERY. SINGLE. MEAL. when we were in Michigan. My body rewarded me with an extra 4 lbs on the scale upon our return. Hoping at least some of it is water weight. Eek.
Taking advantage of the unseasonably warm (hot?) weather to get in some walking outside. I also might break out my bike in the next few days, although I'm terrified of biking in the city traffic.
QOTD: My old workplace had an exercise challenge where you competed against other departments. I found it motivating, but the office as a whole wasn't that excited about it and we did terribly.
I'm interested in a weight loss challenge, but I would just have to be careful to not become too obsessive/restrictive. I've been focusing on losing the weight in a healthy way, which for me has mostly been slowly.
AMH 0.5, AFC 5-8, FSH 7ish
IVF #1 - antagonist. Empty follicle syndrome. 1 retrieved, 0 fertilized.
IVF #2 - antagonist. Ovulated early. 3 retrieved, 2 fertilized, 0 blasts
When S left town there were a dozen cupcakes in the fridge. Guess what I've been having for dinner?
Ok, well it's not quite as bad as all that (and no, I didn't eat all the cupcakes), but I did have to try on 3 different shirts this morning to find one that fit. So apparently I *am* bigger than I was last time it was short-sleeve weather. Yuck.
QOTD: Never done it. The only time I lost weight in an intentional way was leading up to our wedding, when I lost 30 lbs on Nutrisystem. The Kid Era requires a different kind of eating (and by that I mean I'm not going to eat prepackaged meals I wouldn't want them trying), so I really don't know how to go about losing weight now. With the time change I'm hoping I can get outside more after work, and I also have plans to unearth our treadmill, but so far my efforts have been sporadic.
Alllllllll that said, I would probably be interested in joining a weight loss challenge. I follow a group of bumpies who have a blog about weight loss, and I think it's neat that they put it all out there (including scale pics on weigh-in day!): https://crapcutters.blogspot.com/ I also like reading it because it's not a blog about women who are 140 lbs and trying to get to 120 lbs. Closer to my weight makes it feel more real.
I would be up for maybe having a private blog where those taking part in the challenge can do no-holds-barred sharing. I'm not so sure I would lay it all out there in a public space with check-ins here on this board (for example).
IUI #3 gave us the best 2nd anniv. gift ever: 2 babies! (born 03/09/10)
Peanut and Little Man are getting so big! 2 years old already!
finally blogging again at This Will Be: An Adventure
I'd be in for that (though I have no idea how to go about setting it up). And you've met me - lord knows I am not 140 looking to get to 120
Blogs: Our Growing Family - CT Working Moms
I think I could set up a blog and make it so we could all post if we wanted to go that route.
IUI #3 gave us the best 2nd anniv. gift ever: 2 babies! (born 03/09/10)
Peanut and Little Man are getting so big! 2 years old already!
finally blogging again at This Will Be: An Adventure
AMH 0.5, AFC 5-8, FSH 7ish
IVF #1 - antagonist. Empty follicle syndrome. 1 retrieved, 0 fertilized.
IVF #2 - antagonist. Ovulated early. 3 retrieved, 2 fertilized, 0 blasts
I love the challenge/blog idea. I've never done a challenge type thing before, just on my own or with Jen (who had much less to lose than me).
This week has gone well, although all the eating out my parents do has been a challenge. I have no problem ordering something light/healthy, but my dad always orders appetizers to share, and he is a very slow eater so I'll finish my meal and then have another 30-40 minutes to sit while he finishes - and while I don't mind the time at all, it does lead to me picking at the food I'd decided not to finish, or at the appetizers still on the table, etc. I realized today at lunch that I need to (a) bring gum and/or (b) order a cup of coffee or hot tea as soon as I finish so I have something to do besides continue to eat. I'm also trying to get Jen onboard with not eating out when we're alone, except for a special meal here or there, b/c they go out all the time and it's enough (financially and calorically!) without us going out too.
I went for a run yesterday in our new neighborhood, and eh, thumbs down. There are no sidewalks! The traffic isn't bad, but it's so annoying trying to dodge cars and mud. The two-mile loop I did was OK for "emergency" runs when I just need to fit something in, but I guess I will drive to a nearby trail for longer ones. Boo.
Definitely gained a few lbs over vacation but felt pretty motivated to get back to gym/healthy eating/tracking when I returned so that's good and I've done well so far this week.
I've never taken part in a weight loss challenge, although I will admit that one of the motivating factors in my weight loss was probably being in a WW At Work group and wanting to be the one who lost the most/was the most successful...a little weight loss challenge of my own if you will. It worked so I can't complain!
I find the idea of a private weight loss (and possibly weight maintenance?) blog appealing, but I am only trying to lose 10-12 lbs to get back to my goal weight (which is NOT 120!
). And if I get pregnant it all goes out the window anyway.
9 IUIs = 9 BFNs
IVF October 2012: 22 eggs retrieved, 17 fertilized, 5 frozen
ET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Blighted ovum discovered at 7w5d; D&E
FET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Missed m/c discovered at 9w5d; D&E
Karyotyping: normal ~ RPL Testing: normal ~ Hysteroscopy: normal
FET #2: 1 blast transferred 10/25; BFP 10/31!
EDD 7/13/14 ~ Induced at 37w4d due to pre-eclampsia ~ Born on 6/28/14
*Everyone welcome*
Blogs: Our Growing Family - CT Working Moms
I'm taking part in a Biggest Loser Challenge at work. It's 15 weeks long and I think we're on week 9. I've lost 5 lbs. I don't exercise though and I don't really diet. The joke in the office last week was that I ran once and drank lots of alcohol yet I lost a pound so I'm sticking with my martini diet
In all seriousness though the challenge as a whole is good. We all have code numbers and each week an email is sent out with participants weight loss (as percentage of starting weight). It's fun to see where I am in the group even though I don't know who is above/below me.
I'd be much better at this whole thing if I actually had time to exercise. Once a week isn't cutting it but I do know that come May 1st when K's dissertation is done she'll take over some night duties with Jelly Bean and my azz will be on the treadmill.
I haven't lost weight, but I've been good about going to the gym. If I go 50x in 6 months my insurance will give me $200 and I'm really motivated to get my money, sadly enough. I desperatelyy want/need to lose weight but it somehow doesnt translate to enough effort to make it happen. It doesn't help of course that my body resists all efforts I make.
Years ago when I was successfully losing weight I was part of an online forum that had a ww challenge group and a group for people with a lot to lose. I'd be up for a private blog with challenges on this topic, but I'm pretty private about my actual weight and biggest loser style photos. Also, I'm in it to lose weight until I someday (maybe, hopefully, feeling negative right now...) get pregnant. But after that I've been told by an ob that I should aim to not gain weight in pregnancy, which is of course effectively losing.
IVF Oct/Nov 2012
Beta #1 = 77, Beta #2 = 190, Beta #3 = 1044
Cautiously optimistic.
I'm just under half a pound shy of 20lbs lost since December, which is my initial goal. I've been the exact same weight all week, which I think is thanks to AF. :P so I'm hoping I'll break it this weekend (I usually only weigh once a week on Fridays but I'm SO CLOSE I just keep checking). I'll definitely hit it before my birthday, which I'm excited about. I've got more goals after but I'll be very happy to reach that. on Monday I bought a pair of pants two sizes smaller than what I was wearing when I started. I use myfitnesspal to track, but I've never done a formal challenge.
just FYI, you can set up a private blog on WP and give multiple users access to post on it, and people could choose to make their posts public or private if they wanted since WP isn't all or nothing like Blogger is. everyone using it would have to have a WP account, but they're free and it would show who was posting what.