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young (immature) coworker vent

racampbell1racampbell1
in Working Moms
Argh.  Maybe I'm just old, b!tchy and very pregnant, but I have a coworker who is driving me bonkers lately.  I'm almost 8 months pregnant, and just want to come in, get my work done and go home to spend time with DD/DH.  She comes into my office 4-5 times per day (even when my door is CLOSED) to gossip and tell me the latest office drama.  I'm getting to the point where I want to scream, "I DON'T CARE".  I've tried politely saying, "I'm really busy, can we talk later" or "Let's get a coffee later and we can chat" but she doesn't take the hint.  Is it time to be a bit rude?  Or is she the one being rude and I have a pass to be more assertive about not wasting my time?   Thanks for listening!
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Re: young (immature) coworker vent

  • EastCoastBrideEastCoastBride member

    "who" is she - do you care about her/ her feelings, or even in helping her?

    You could be more direct "Honestly, I'm really not interested in knowing all this" and just shut it down.

    OR "mentor" her - be careful of being getting caught up in the office gossip drama because it may make people think negatively of her.

    "Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
    ~Benjamin Franklin

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  • racampbell1racampbell1
    She's a mid-level lawyer, I'm several years ahead in terms of experience.  We aren't staffed on cases together but her office is right next to mine.  I do care about her feelings because I like her as a person - a lot, which is part of what makes me feel really awkward in handling this situation, should have said that in my initial post.  I've tried to also counsel her to stay out of office drama because it is never good to be the one in the thick of it, but she can't seem to help herself! 
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  • NicoleD0516NicoleD0516 member
    She's the one being rude. I'm surprised she hasn't picked up on your cues yet. Next time, I would say, "I'm sorry, I can't chat right now as I'm up against a deadline and really need to get xyz done". Hopefully that will do the trick. If you say the same thing often enough, she should eventually get the hint that now is not a good time to chat.
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    Julian: EDD 8/1/16
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  • campbaby76campbaby76 member
    Really I think that you could be completely honest with her and tell her that you need to get your work done so that you can get home to your family and that her interuptions are prohibiting that.  At the same time set up a coffee/lunch date with her. I think that this can be doen with out hurting her feelings. Just let her know that you are wanting to balance work life and home life a little better.
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  • EastCoastBrideEastCoastBride member

    If you don't mind her talking to you occasionally and dont' necessarily want to totally cut her off, I'd be more direct about the # of times she comes in.

    "I've got to be really honest - I'm really busy right now and I simply don't have time to talk numerous times throughout the day about office gossip.  I'm willing to go for a coffee break with you once a day, but I really need to ask that we curtail these random visits throughout the day.".

    And dropping in the "about office gossip" might also drive the point home a little more that she's TOO involved and needs to step away.

    "Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
    ~Benjamin Franklin

    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
    DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10

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  • financialdivafinancialdiva member
    Not to change the subject- but did you take that new job racampbell?
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  • racampbell1racampbell1

    imagefinancialdiva:
    Not to change the subject- but did you take that new job racampbell?

    I am 99% sure that I will, we're in the process of negotiating salary, etc.  They are slow... so the process is taking a bit longer than I thought.  I'm hoping to have some answers in the next week so we can move forward!

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