update from earlier vent

abakies33 · March 2012

well what i thought i was mad earlier, turns out that was just anger. i am officially pissed now. just talked to the night shift nurse, she informed me that wyatt had been doing great since his last brady. my reply was well that is just wonderful. his day shift nurse told me he did wonderful for her all day. this is the point that she tells me he had a brady at 1230 in his sleep! i spoke with the day shift nurse 2 times today ater 1230 and never did she tell me about this. is this not something that she thinks i need to know? or am i overreacitng? i live 2 hrs away from where he is in NICU so i didnt go up today, if i wouldve known about the 2nd brady he had today i wouldve got my butt in the car and drove myself to my son and held him all day. it breaks my heart to think he is up there all alone and probably scared. and here i was trying to catch up on sleep and house work....

OrganicTeacher · March 2012

Holy crap. I would be pissed off too. I would call tomorrow and ask to the head of the department and express your upset about the whole thing. That is just ridiculous and unprofessional on their side. Plus - where is the caring care? The care is not only for the child, but for the parents too - and a big part of that is allowing us to know when things are not going right for us to be there for him or her. I would honestly report this crap.

kck329 · March 2012

I know you are upset but try and see it from the nurse's perspective. Almost all preemies have bradies. If it was a quick self-recovered brady (which I think is what you are describing), it was actually not unusual for a baby at 35 weeks. Most babies don't start outgrowing their bradies until after 36-38 weeks and many not until after 40. This is probably why the nurse didn't call you. If they called every time every baby had a brady, they would be on the phone for the whole shift. If you want that kind of alert, it might help to have calm conversation with the nurse so they know what you need.

I know how scary it is to hear your LO is struggling. Take a deep breath and remember that one episode is not a big setback, its a pretty normal occurrence for the NICU even if it is a scary one. The emotional ups and downs of the NICU are really hard, but in this case I think you may be overreacting a little. I'm sorry you had a rough night, I hope today is better.

ChickensFive · March 2012

I think you are overreacting. You don't need to be called for every brady or apena because you can't do anything to stop these from happening its a part of being a preemie he has to learn to not do them and he will. Plus, the nurses would be on the phone calling parents more than taking care of the LOs if they called for every A or B. The ones that I really worried about were the ones that they needed to be stimulated (which happened a lot in the beginning) but I still wasn't called for those; the nurses gave me an update everytime I called or came in. The only thing I wanted to be called for were infections or more serious issues, like I said bradys and apenas are apart of being a preemie. Moving forward maybe ask a nurse to call in the morning and let you know how he did or maybe you can call first thing in the am or at the beginning of each shift.

ijustcantthinkrightnow · March 2012

Bradys are a common occurance in preemies. When I would call to check on my little ones I don't think I ever got a 'tally' of how many bradys they had infact I assu...med they had a few unless a nurse said 'they've had no Bradys'. I would not want my phone ringing everytime they had a Brady (sometimes multiple times an hour), the NICU only called me when there was a change in their status or stability (such as a suspected infection or going from cannula to CPAP or on the vent.)

If Bradys are something that you do want to be notified of then at your next visit or check in call I would simply ask the nurse to document that on you little one's chart so they know. Again I don't think it's common place in many NICU's to call about Bradys because they are so common and fairly harmless. Communication with the nurses is key, I even told our nurses at one point that they didn't need to call me for certain things like days when our DD was doing a cannula trial, if she went back on CPAP ok, I didnt need a call. Sliding back to the vent was a different story.

It's alot going on being in the NICU and it can be scary and stressful for us Preemie Moms. I wouldn't beat yourself up for catching up on sleep and house work, sometimes you need that break. I know in our case the twins had Bradys even when I held them or sitting right there.

njdcgirl · March 2012

If I remember your last post right, your LO was supposed to be discharged, but had a Brady which "reset the clock", right? And then this was another one later the same day? In any case, I understand why you are upset (LO was so close to coming home and now is having some small - normal - setbacks.) I do think you are over reacting a little bit though. If you are indeed on a Brady-less countdown to going home (that being the only thing keeping LO in) then I think you should have a calm, reasonable chat with his nurses that says you would like a call if another one happens. Maybe they can put it on his chart too. AND, I would be sure that I ask every time I call or come in if he'd have any. The nurses are so busy with multiple babies that sometimes they don't remember what part of LOs care is most important to the parent, and as others said Brady's are a normal occurrence in a preemie your LOs age. I'm sure she didn't NOT tell you just to keep it from you, and I don't think this situation warrants going to the charge nurse or anything. I know it's frustrating, and I hope your LO is home soon.

urbanflowerpot · March 2012

I understand how stressed you are right now but I think you are overreacting.

I've never heard of a NICU that calls for apnea/brady events. They are extremely common with preemies and while I felt like they were incredibly serious at the time I now know they weren't a big deal. Scary, yes, but nothing life-threatening.

If I'd been called every event my phone would have been ringing off the hook. DS came home before his EDD on an apnea monitor and continued having 15-20/per day (several needing stim) and then had to be readmitted. He was on a monitor for four months at home - episodes became part of our usual day.

They grow out of them eventually but sometimes not as quickly as we'd like.

When I was sitting in NICU his micro neighbor had to be revived a few times - I've never seen so many neos and nurses run and gather. When DS had an event a nurse would walk over, touch him, nudge sometimes, and turn the alarm off. That gave me some perspective, even in the moment. I watched each and every time: one nurse would go off on a cell and call the micro's family. I fully trusted them to call if anything was serious. A's and B's - not so much.

I hope this passes quickly for you. If they can't call please try to understand why.

Natalie_may · March 2012

I agree that you're overreacting a bit here. At the NICU we were in bradys requireing stim were the only ones charted formally. If they did not require stim they were just in the nurses notes. A brady requiring stim would "reset the clock" but if it didn't and was just a quick up and down that self resolved it wouldn't.

It's tough when you're close to the home stretch but try to remember that he's still a preemie and doing awesome to be so close to home at 35 weeks.

katie4253 · March 2012

I think you are overreacting. Bradies are very common, and as long as your LO didn't need stimulation to come out of it, I really don't think it is a big deal. Even then, I think it'd depend on how much stimulation it required for me to feel I needed to be called.

I understand being in the NICU is a suckfest. But, in the grand scheme of things this is not worth getting worked up about. From here forward I'd just ask when you call to check in to see if he had any A's, B's, or D's if you feel it is really that important for you to know.

abakies33 · March 2012

just to clear things up, it didnt upset me because they didnt call. i understand that they cant call me for little things like bradys. it upset me because i had called to check on him 2 times after he had the 2nd brady and was told, " he has been fine, there is no new news." and these were words from his nurse. in the part of nicu he is in there are 2 nurses and only 4 babies. in my opinion, i shouldnt have been told nothing new had happened. i shouldve been told, your son had a brady and is doing fine since it. i also will add that this is my 1st and only complaint with all the nurses and doctors. i love the care he gets, and the compasion they give to him is unbelieveable. i was just in such shock that i was livid. this being said, we are so lucky that this is the only issue we are having and it is a blessing. many of you are going through so much more than we are and i have no clue where you are pulling the strength from. i honelsty feel that i did overreact and went a bit drama, it was a very long day filled with alot of emotion... i also feel a bit ashamed that i, as my momma wouldve said "showed my ass" lol. please forgive me ladies.

katie4253 · March 2012

abakies33:
just to clear things up, it didnt upset me because they didnt call. i understand that they cant call me for little things like bradys. it upset me because i had called to check on him 2 times after he had the 2nd brady and was told, " he has been fine, there is no new news." and these were words from his nurse. in the part of nicu he is in there are 2 nurses and only 4 babies. in my opinion, i shouldnt have been told nothing new had happened. i shouldve been told, your son had a brady and is doing fine since it. i also will add that this is my 1st and only complaint with all the nurses and doctors. i love the care he gets, and the compasion they give to him is unbelieveable. i was just in such shock that i was livid. this being said, we are so lucky that this is the only issue we are having and it is a blessing. many of you are going through so much more than we are and i have no clue where you are pulling the strength from. i honelsty feel that i did overreact and went a bit drama, it was a very long day filled with alot of emotion... i also feel a bit ashamed that i, as my momma wouldve said "showed my ass" lol. please forgive me ladies.

You don't need to ask for forgiveness. We've all been there. We were just offering you a little perspective. How was your LO today? Are you feeling any better?

haziedaze · March 2012

abakies33:
just to clear things up, it didnt upset me because they didnt call. i understand that they cant call me for little things like bradys. it upset me because i had called to check on him 2 times after he had the 2nd brady and was told, " he has been fine, there is no new news." and these were words from his nurse. in the part of nicu he is in there are 2 nurses and only 4 babies. in my opinion, i shouldnt have been told nothing new had happened. i shouldve been told, your son had a brady and is doing fine since it. i also will add that this is my 1st and only complaint with all the nurses and doctors. i love the care he gets, and the compasion they give to him is unbelieveable. i was just in such shock that i was livid. this being said, we are so lucky that this is the only issue we are having and it is a blessing. many of you are going through so much more than we are and i have no clue where you are pulling the strength from. i honelsty feel that i did overreact and went a bit drama, it was a very long day filled with alot of emotion... i also feel a bit ashamed that i, as my momma wouldve said "showed my ass" lol. please forgive me ladies.

I'm sorry it's been a long day. Being away from your baby is very stressful. This happened to us several times. They would forget to tell us that he had several sticks for a new IV, had a bloody stool, or had A&Bs. I also called several times a day, or sometimes I was even there and they would forget to tell me about things that happened while I grabbed lunch. For them, these things were standard NICU operating procedure. I understood because I had worked in NICUs, but it was different for me because it was MY baby.

I would be livid too, but it was really about so much more. I'd be mad at the nurses, but I was really mad because I was tired, strung out, and worried about my baby. I think all NICU moms have shared that experience. Perspective helps, so I'm glad you got a little from everyone today, but everyone understands too and we're here to listen! Hope that baby gets home really soon!

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