When people think they are being judged.

ABColeslaw · March 2012

I was in Walmart the other day. I was in the diaper aisle grabbing some overnights for Asher. There was a woman pushing a child around in a cart in the same aisle as me. I wasn't thinking about her perse, but I was aware they were there because she kept sighing like she was frustrated. Anyway, a heard a huge crash and stuff starts falling everywhere, so I turn and look at the sound. At the point she starts yelling at her what looks like to be five year old and told him "If you don't want diapers, then stop crapping your pants" I turn away and leave the aisle but she comes into the next aisle and says "Don't you dare judge me"

Okay.....

1. *** fell, I looked at the sound.

2. I'm not judging you, I didn't care at all until you brought me into this

3. It is my honest to goodness belief that people think they are being judged for things that they are insecure about.

I really wasn't judging the diaper thing because her kid could be a really big three year old struggling with potty training. I wasn't judging the tantrum, because kids do that. I wasn't even judging the language she used with him, because God knows what has gotten her to the point she was at.

So I said "Sorry, I'm not judging you." and walked away

But what is the correct response, because she still seemed bullshit pissed as she walked away.

[Deleted User] · March 2012

I think you were calm & polite about it. I probably would have just rolled my eyes & left, or just left without saying anything to the super stressed lady.

BeachBum73 · March 2012

My thought....that had nothing to do with you. You were in the wrong place at the wrong time. It sounded like she was talking to whoever judges her (or she feels judges her) in "real life" and you just happened to be on the receiving end. I think you're response was fine because I don't think anything you could have said would have made a difference.

CinemaGoddess · March 2012

In a perfect world, I would've said, "I'm not judging you at all. It looks like you're having a difficult time today. Is there anything I can do to help?"

In reality, I probably would've shook my head and walked away.

crystina06 · March 2012

BeachBum73:
My thought....that had nothing to do with you. You were in the wrong place at the wrong time. It sounded like she was talking to whoever judges her (or she feels judges her) in "real life" and you just happened to be on the receiving end. I think you're response was fine because I don't think anything you could have said would have made a difference.

This. And it kind of seems like she was looking to pick a fight, so just saying what you did and walking away was probably best.

[Deleted User] · March 2012

The user and all related content has been deleted.

KJmashup · March 2012

She probably frequents sites like TB where there are people teeming with judgment at everything.

I would've done as you did and then tried to brush it off.

kerribear1717 · March 2012

Sounds like that lady needed a time out. To be so pissed in your life that you have to take the effort to find you in the next aisle over and be snarky tell you not to judge when you didn't even say anything at all? I might have asked her if she needed a hug

[Deleted User] · March 2012

KJmashup:

She probably frequents sites like TB where there are people teeming with judgment at everything.

I would've done as you did and then tried to brush it off.

LOL!

ames71 · March 2012

BeachBum73:
My thought....that had nothing to do with you. You were in the wrong place at the wrong time. It sounded like she was talking to whoever judges her (or she feels judges her) in "real life" and you just happened to be on the receiving end. I think you're response was fine because I don't think anything you could have said would have made a difference.

I agree. She was probably having sh!t for a day. I think your response was fine.

Mt2G1012 · March 2012

CinemaGoddess:
In a perfect world, I would've said, "I'm not judging you at all. It looks like you're having a difficult time today. Is there anything I can do to help?"

In reality, I probably would've shook my head and walked away.

Pretty much this

magdalina.h · March 2012

I think you had the right response. I would be shocked if someone followed me to a different aisle to "call me out".

ames71 · March 2012

KJmashup:
She probably frequents sites like TB where there are people teeming with judgment at everything.
I would've done as you did and then tried to brush it off.

Also, this.

mamabrof · March 2012

She must be either a.) sleep deprived or b.) very insecure. It's one thing to think you're being judged. It's another to actively follow someone to say something about it when you didn't say a damn thing to her.

MarSamWhitney · March 2012

BeachBum73:
My thought....that had nothing to do with you. You were in the wrong place at the wrong time. It sounded like she was talking to whoever judges her (or she feels judges her) in "real life" and you just happened to be on the receiving end. I think you're response was fine because I don't think anything you could have said would have made a difference.

This. Sounds like she was having a very bad day. Not to excuse her behavior, she was still rude..but thats the only thing I can think of!

emiliemadison · March 2012

Dude. I would've been all "I wasnt judging you before, but I am now!"

ali_bl-nov05 · March 2012

Your momma raised a very polite person. I would have told her "Well, my world does revolve around you"

scoutkate · March 2012

I would have been judging her for publicly humiliating her kid.

MamaSquish · March 2012

I feel bad for both of you! Obviously she was having a rough day, and that sucks, I've been there. That doesn't give her the right to be a b!tch to you though.

I probably would've been speechless.

ASmallWonder · March 2012

I agree with the others. What you said was fine - there really wasn't a better way to handle someone who was being aggressive about a perceived slight. Wait, my mom has a young child and shops at your Walmart? :-p

robinsokj · March 2012

There is no correct response for the crazy. No matter what you could have said it probably would have been wrong

Doodle2011 · March 2012

You handled it well. She sounds like she just had a meltdown kinda day. I still feel bad for her kid though, her reaction in the store isn't likely to instill confidence in him/her to be able to go without the diapers anytime soon.

scoutkate · March 2012

EllaHella:

::dons flame retardant suit::

I would probably judge a mom berating a 5 year old in public for bathroom accidents. I'm not going to lie and be bpc (bump politically correct.) Sure she was probably at her wits end. But I would silently think "woah. That's shittsy" as I silently fled that aisle.

And when she stalked me to the next aisle I would have resembled a possum caught in tail lights.

I feel exactly the same way.

ali_bl-nov05 · March 2012

Doodle2011:
You handled it well. She sounds like she just had a meltdown kinda day. I still feel bad for her kid though, her reaction in the store isn't likely to instill confidence in him/her to be able to go without the diapers anytime soon.

Agreed, poor kid

groovygrl · March 2012

I dont think you did anything wrong, it was very nice of you.

I would have said, no worries, we've all been there. (even though many of us keep the words in our head)

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