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Two Under 2
Bubsie1020
member
Honestly, those who are preggo with toddlers...
Bubsie1020
member
in Two Under 2
Seriously, how hard is it? We are contemplating trying again, but L is such a handful, and I just wonder how the he77 we'd do it. What do you find hardest? Just looking for input from those who are going through it.... Working moms especially.... (posted on 12-24 too)..
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Re: Honestly, those who are preggo with toddlers...
Its harder now with two of course, but I would say it was a heck of a lot easier with the age diff I had before. DS was 9 months when I got pg and walked at 13 months, so by then I was done with all day sickness.
Thats the hardest for me...being sick and feeling like a bad mom cause I am not taking them out a lot. It doesnt last long. I also have it bad since DH is gone for weeks at a time. Its all very worth it, and having them close is something we are always happy about.
It depends on several factors:
Pregnancy symptoms - I get really sick when pregnant. It's like 1st tri the whole time. I throw up every day and am really tired all the time. Throwing up every day while taking care of a toddler is not easy. I also have to eat frequently or I get sicker so that's hard to keep up with. Also, depending on how you carry the pregnancy it can be challenging to carry the toddler.
Toddler - I have a toddler who is just now becoming a slightly normal sleeper. He takes super long naps but only sleeps from like 9-10 pm until 5-6 am at night. When pregnant I'd like to sleep longer than that and depending on your partner and your toddler that may not be possible. I also have a very active toddler so that's a factor as well. If your toddler is not independently mobile yet that's another factor.
Schedule - I was a working mom during this pregnancy. For me it was challenging because I have a demanding job (teaching) and often brought work home. I also (as I mentioned) have a child who goes to bed late so when I brought work home it meant I was up really late. I also didn't get to nap when he was napping. Other working moms find it can be nice to get a break and be able to sit all day, go to the bathroom when needed etc.
I'm sure there are other factors too but those are the ones I was able to think of. It's all worth it in the end though
This pregnancy has been more difficult because I can't just relax and put my feet up whenever I feel like it. It's more tiring not having that time to relax and also chasing my 18-month old ds around. However, I've been fortunate to have a fairly easy pregnancy and a DH who helps out a lot so it's not terrible. The other challenging thing is that ds has been sick quite a bit this winter (picking up colds at daycare) and he doesn't sleep well when he's sick, so getting up with him at night definitely wears me out. I've relaxed my standards as far as less working out and being lazier about making dinner because I've been more tired, but I think overall it hasn't been too bad.
Well, I have two toddlers and will share both of my experiences with you. My second pregnancy, DD1 didn't walk yet, so that actually wasn't that bad. Believe it or not, it's way easier to have to carry a baby around during pregnancy than chase a new walker, or when you need to carry (aka: restrain) a walker who is struggling to get down and away from you.
I worked full-time throughout my first and second pregnancies, and it was doable. Going back to work after #2 was born was harder than going back after #1. I found it easier to leave a newborn, who mostly slept and cried, than to leave my then 17-month-old oldest child, because she was at a such a fun age and I was really seeing all the fun stuff I was missing out on due to be a working mom. Plus, I tried EBF #2 whereas by the time I went back to work after #1, she was all formula-fed. finding time to pump was HARD. I only made it to EBF for five months before I gave up on pumping and starting giving DD2 formula while I was at work.
My third pregnancy, I have a two-year-old and a one-year-old. It definitely wears me out chasing my one-year-old and keeping her out of trouble. My two-year-old knows what she can get into and what she shouldn't, so when she is the only one awake, it's not that difficult to watch her. I would say that while both kids are up, the hardest part is making sure #1 doesn't hurt #2 (intentionally or not) and breaking up fights over snatched toys. So, I do think it would be a bit easier to be pg with a mobile one-year-old if I didn't have to worry about my 2yo horse-collaring her, etc., but it still would definitely be harder than having a non-walker.
I worked four days a week (32 hours) throughout the first half of my third pregnancy, before I got laid off. It was hard, but doable. There are perks to working while pg, IMO. I was much better hydrated when I was working, because I sipped water all day. Now I have to keep a drink out of reach of grabby toddlers, and get too distracted to keep re-filling it so I do not drink nearly as much water as I used to, and I notice the difference. Also when I worked, I could snack whenever I needed to. I can't always sop and get a snack now while chasing my kids, and it's annoying to try to eat around two toddlers when I don't want them to have what I'm eating, etc. I get sick a lot during pregnancy too, which is easier at work even though it's gross to puke in public. It's nice to run to the bathroom without worrying about sticking kids in their cribs first to keep them safe.
For me the pregnancy part has been easy with a toddler, however, I was really only sick and tired during the first tri, which I was still off work, by the time I went back I was 12 weeks, feeling much better and because of our schedule DS is in bed by 630, so I can go to bed pretty early too. Most of the time I feel like I forget I'm pregnant, not in a harmful to the baby sort of way, just that I'm busy with work, DS and housework, I don't have a whole lot of time to think about it.
Our hardest part is the couple hours in the evenings, because DS just wants to be held or played with and I have to make dinner and DH is at work, but I haven't been back all that long, so hopefully that will get better.
DD2 October 2010
DS September 2012
It's tough for me!
DD is 16 months, I'm 11w pregnant, and I work full time. I feel a bad mom because it's hard for me to play with DD when I have all day m/s (which is finally starting to go away--yay!), I spend little time with DH becaue I go to bed when DD goes to bed (9pm), and I can't stomach it to cook meals so we're eating out a lot right now or making easy meals. I also don't have the energy to clean so DH is doing everything. He is an absolute saint.
Even though I'm making it sound awful, I wouldn't change it. I wanted DD and #2 to be close in age and I'm so happy that it's going to happen. I imagine that it would be just as hard if I had say a 3 year age gap.
I think that I'm more terrified of when I'm pregnant with #3...then I'll have 2 little ones to entertain instead of 1!
Good luck with whatever you decide!
I am just over 7 weeks with #2 right now and I am just as tired as I was with #1, but there is nothing I can do about it.
I work full time and then rush to get DD to spend time with her. By the time she is in bed, I've fed myself( she eats way to early for me), cleaned up the house, and get ready for the next day, it's 9PM and I'm ready to drop.
I miss my naps from my first pregnancy.